intimate update

this is insane. this site started out as just something where i could post things i love, which was mostly assassin’s creed. then i started making ac gifs for a couple years and it was such a big part of my life... i mean my first ac post was in 2010!!!  i met amazing people on here and my followers were just the best. i have the fondest memories of falling in love with the game and the creative process of creating on photoshop and a lot of who i am today still involve the two. i honestly had the happiest times updating this site. 

then i just slowly let go. a little bit before i “disappeared,” i had to move across the country and during the process i got into a nasty car accident. this site just reminded me of everything that i had lost and all my pain. ac was a lasting link to what i considered home at that time, which is probably why it still holds a special place in my heart, but it just made me hurt so much. after i moved, no one there seemed to understand my adoration for the game. as stupid as it sounds, i was identified as an ac lover where i used to live and losing that made me feel like i lost a part of myself. who i was on this site just wasn’t enough to keep my emotionally afloat at that time. eventually, opening up photoshop became a chore; i was forcing myself through each gif. i tried really hard to keep it going as long as i could but updates became so sporadic, i kept making excuses to prolong posting, and i knew i was being disingenuous to my past self and this site. i even thought just creating another new ac gif site would solve the problem... it did not. 

however, within these 6-7 years i have grown so much and learned how to accept what has happened to me. i fell deep into depression, and even now i’m still slowly crawling out, but i was, and still am, fortunate enough to have people who cared about me to nudge me towards therapy. i got the help i needed and took the time to heal. i let the pain this site gave me happen; i did not try to avoid it. it stayed for a long time, persisted, and finally it calloused... it doesn’t hurt like it did before but i will always remember how it did.

currently, i am in rome, a place i chose because of my love of ac. i never felt so rejuvenated and motivated to come back to this site. just seeing the places where i virtually did missions but in person... it just... really makes me feel some type of way. to be completely honest, i don’t think i will ever feel the same happiness i felt back in 2010, but that means i wont feel the pain i had before either. it’s just during all these years, ac has been so important to me and i think i finally feel that i am in a good enough state of mind where i can enjoy coming back and updating. hopefully, that feeling lasts. 

i know this post might not matter to many because i have no idea if anyone still remembers me back in 2010. but... i don’t know. i felt the need to explain myself and i am comfortable enough to do so. but on the matter of if i was articulate enough... who knows, haha.

anyways, maybe i’ll be back soon... or not. 

how to summon asscreed syndicate

Assassin’s Creed Syndicate

Uncharted 4: A Thief’s End

I went the third and final day and it was such a great experience. Aside from all the cool photo opportunities, it was so exciting to see some exclusive content... that I have to wait about a year to play. 

Sony had a 3 in 1 experience where people were able to see an extended version of Horizon, The Last Guardian, and Uncharted 4. Horizon: Damn, that main character is so cool. I loved how they played with a post apocalyptic setting from our time period. The animals, Grazers, have biofuels on them that tribes use but I was wondering who or what is making those mechanical animals??? You get to use three types of arrows: electrical, explosive, and amour piercing. There’s also rope darts that can hold larger animals dow. You can also use weapons that you shoot off of them, like disk launchers. The physics of the game is very realistic as well; you can feel the weight of each different type of weapon. I’m super excited because it’s just such a unique game that leaves you, or at least me, contemplating about the dynamics between humans, technology, and the natural world.  The Last Guardian: The little boy finds the creature locked up and it starts off like a “pull the thorn out of the lion” archetype. You feed it and have it follow you and well... there wasn’t much more than what was shown in the conference. Uncharted 4: My favourite game!!! There were about 15 times that I wanted to cry. So after the car chase Nathan continues on ... another car chase to get to his brother. Then he almost dies because a car crashes into him and flips it over, gas is leaking, a fire starts (I almost start to cry), but he escapes. Then him and his brother meet up with Sully and talk about their treasure hunt. He talks about an island where hundreds maybe thousands of pirates sought refuge and shared everything, even their money. They pooled all their gold into one central location. Then, then, then, omg, as they walk into where they’re staying Elena is there!!! She was made to believe that Nathan was in Malaysia and the look she had was so sad and disappointed. Wah, I just love them together. 

Ubisoft also had many things going on as well, as you can see in the photo. There were different stations around a central location where there was like a dancing panda... Assassin’s Creed Syndicate: People were able to watch a mission in Westminster and the rope darts were used in action. It had a heavy influence of trains because the developers felt it was important because it was the Industrial Revolution (y’all probably know that but it was emphasised during the gameplay). Hm.. Jacob gave his hat to a little boy Rook. The assassination was brutal as ever--all close and personal--hidden blade through the head. Then it cut to Evie standing on top of a building and she does a leap of faith. I think to make up for the lack of her, they showed her character trailer after. Outside, people were able to have the opportunity to try out the game. I believe I saw people playing the mission of assassinating Bloody Nora and then, I don’t know so many people were stuck. People also got an Assassin’s Creed backpack if they tried it out. 

Overall, it was fun. I took pictures with a giant cow for Harvest Moon, Fallout, Ratchet... ah, it was great and I can’t wait for all the games to come out. 

If any of you went, how was your experience?

May 22, 2015 // Disneyland’s Diamond Celebration

“Because thou hast offended against our sovereign the King’s Grace in committing treason against his person, and here attainted of the same, the law of the realm is this, that thou hast deserved death, and thy judgment is tis: that thou shalt be burned here within the Tower of London on the Green, else to have thy head smitten off, as the King’s pleasure shall be further known of the same.” -- Thomas Howard, Duke of Norfolk and Uncle to Anne