happy ?/!

everybody go home this is the best tweet of the day

9:21:21 pm today will be the 21st second of the 21st minute of the 21st hour of the 21st day of the 21st week of the 21st year of the 21st century

Arrgh! I missed it!

me @ myself: why are u like this?

hello 911? hi yeah omg sorry i know it’s late and this is probably so annoying like i hell don’t wanna bother you haha, like i know you’re probs mad at me, are you mad at me? actually don’t answer that it’s okay haha. omg this is so stupid like i sound like such a crybaby right now, like for real i’m listening to myself talk and i’m like “aaahh you’re so embarrassing!!” haha like … omg haha i’m so… anyway. what was i saying? oh right. so i was just stabbed in the chest and

cant stand time zones. i want to experience time together 

happy annoy squidward day

I can’t do this anymore bestie [continues to do it]

“i expected better from you” well that was your fault lmao I got nothing to do with that

[on a date]

me: it really blows my mind how so many languages and cultures coexist within this soc-

JFK: blows your what

me:

JFK: say it

i’ve been having way too much fun on twitter lately

Wow

🤔 But then how did she read the comments.

When you tell your friend a really bad pun;

people who think a zombie apocalypse would be cool