me: “I have social anxiety”

what people hear: “I am a bit shy”

what the internet reads: “OwO cute shy boi,,must protecc!! hehe so quirky!1!!”

what social anxiety really is: taking months of knowing someone to feel comfortable enough to have a real conversation, your mind going blank during small talk, inability to participate in groups of more than three people, mentally rehearsing “simple” tasks such as ordering food or making a phone call and your heart racing anyway, constantly feeling watched, being afraid of getting places too early or too late, fear of being judged over the most random things (”is this a socially acceptable ice cream flavor to buy?” “what if they think my shampoo is weird” “will they hate me if I get up to throw my trash away?” “what if I emptied the dishwasher wrong!”), having panic attacks when you have to ask a teacher for help, constantly feeling left out or excluded even with friends, your hands shaking when you get called on in class, being overwhelmed in crowds and public transportation, disliking being touched, perpetual fear of disappointing those in authority, overall difficulty forming relationships, missing out on milestones or social events because you either have no friends to go with or know it will be overwhelming, preferring to be in groups of three so that conversation isn’t solely up to you, making so many everyday tasks so much more difficult than they need to be due to a crushing fear of being judged by random strangers you will literally never see again and needing to be seen as flawless

10 Kdramas I Recommend part 1

Hi ^^.  This is a series thing I’ll be doing every once in a while to keep you guys up to date on kdramas I have been watching or watched that I think you should watch too.  Since this is my first one, I’ll be doing some of my long time favorites to start.  Also, I’m really bad at synopsis’s so don’t give them much weight and listen to my thoughts more (though they might be rambles)

In no particular order~

1.  Hello, Monster (I Remember You)

Year of Release:  June-August, 2015

Stars:  Seo In Guk, Jang Na Ra, Park Bo Gum, and Choi Wonyoung.

Short Synopsis:  Lee Hyun (Seo In Guk) lost his brother and his father to serial killer Lee Joonyoung when he was a child.  After spending the rest of his childhood in America, he returns to Korea as a profiler and begins to work with a police team (special investigative force one I think?), as well as elite detective Cha Ji An (Jang Na Ra).  Along the way, Hyun becomes involved with lawyer Jeong Sungho (Park Bo Gum) and Doctor Lee Joonho (Choi Wonyoung). 

My Thoughts:  This is a great psychological/serial killer drama!  The bromance is absolutely heartbreaking, and the whole character development is so well woven.  It leans a lot on the Nature vs. Nurture debate, and it’s just so good.  I mean, there were twists and turns and it was all so heartbreaking and sad and twisted.  The ending was so unsatisfying, but it was such a good ending too ;_;.   

2.  Black

Year of Release:  October-December, 2017

Stars:  Song Seunghoon, Go Ara, Kim Dongjoon, and Lee EI

Short Synopsis:  Kim Moogang (Song Seunghoon) is a detective.  Kang Haram (Go Ara) has the ability to see shadows of death-if people are going to die, she can see how they will die.  They run into each other and start to work together on a cases that all lead back to a 20 year old mystery.  Moogang gets shot on a case and dies, but grim reaper 444 (sa sa sa) possesses his body for a reason he cannot figure out and has to live as Moogang.  

My Thoughts:  This drama was simply amazing!  It was dark, like Save Me level dark, and the plot is so intricately woven.  There seem to be hundreds of plots, all layered on top of each other with the same root cause.  This drama has so many twists and turns that you can’t even see coming-each episode has you holding your breath.  It’s painful to watch as well, how knowing about death can tear people apart or make people do crazy things.  I loved how much it related back in the most obscure ways, so many kudos to the writers of this.

3.  Duel

Year of Release:  June-July, 2017

Stars:  Yang Sejong, Jung Jaeyoung, Kim Jungeun, and Seo Eunsu

Short Synopsis:  Jang Deukcheon (Jung Jaeyoung) is a police officer who’s daughter is kidnapped.  In his chase to catch the suspect, he arrests Sungjoon (Yang Sejong), who has a case of amnesia-can’t remember anything.  He looks identical to the real culprit, and Deukcheon chooses to believe he is not guilty.  They become fugitives together to find his daughter and the real culprit.  It is revealed that Sungjoon and Sunghoon (also played by Yang Sejong, the real culprit) are clones. 

My Thoughts:  Like Black, this was another OCN drama-they had a great run of these in 2017.  I completely fell for Yang Sejong in this, for a rookie actor he was extremely talented, especially having to play two roles/characters who may look exactly the same, but are definitely not alike in any other way.  The bromance in this is sooooo, well, bromance-y (can you tell I am a sucker for bromance, it tops romance for me) and it’s also so sad, still.  There’s not much romance, but it’s not a drama that needs romance to make it good.  There were hardly any slow moments in it for me, and I found myself eagerly awaiting each episode.  It seems like a happy ending is possible yet impossible, so you are never sure what to spot.  Also, Yang Sejong’s smile is a million dollars!

4.  School 2017

Year of Release:  July-September, 2017

Stars:  Kim Sejeong, Kim Junghyun, Jang Dongyoon, Han Sunhwa, and Han Joowan

Short Synopsis:  At a school, there is a mysterious person called X who creates havoc and trouble.  Due to an incident, Eunho (Kim Sejeong) is going to be expelled.  The principal makes a deal with her: she can either catch X or get expelled.  Eunho becomes involved with Taewoon (Kim Junghyun) and Daehwi (Jang Dongyoon).  The two boys have a history together and now dislike each other. (akhjkahjsjkadshljsd this is the worst summary ever)

My Thoughts:  I love the School series, but this one has been my favorite so far.  Not only was it the one where I discovered Jang Dongyoon (fantastic actor ya’ll), but it was also a good mix of fluff with underlying seriousness.  I expected it to be funny and all, which it was a good amount of times, but it also had some heavy emotions and all in it.  The teachers also added in a good dose of that cheesy stuff you like to see every once and a while.  But honestly, I liked how it had very realistic themes and how it all placed them in the high school environment.

5.  Solomon’s Perjury

Year of Release:  December-January, 2016-17

Stars:  Seo Jihoon, Jang Dongyoon, and Kim Hyunsoo

Short Synopsis:  A student commits suicide at a school.  Ko Seoyeon (Kim Hyunsoo) receives a letter of accusation that states Choi Woohyuk (Baek Chulmin) as the perpetrator of the crime.  Hyunsoo decides to hold a school trial to decide what really happened.  She and a team of students run it.  Han Jihoon (Jang Dongyoon), a student from another school, steps in to be Woohyuk’s attorney.    

My Thoughts:  I absolutely lovvedddd this drama.  It’s only twelve episodes, but I watched it in less than a week.  It’s so…well, it’s everything that you don’t see in your average drama.  It was surprising to see a drama revolving around the idea of suicide and depression, and all this other stuff, even if they changed it and tweaked it and did whatever they did.  And everything’s so mixed up and messed up,,,I wanted to cry half the time, really.

6.  While You Were Sleeping

Year of Release:  September-November, 2017

Stars:  Lee Jongsuk, Bae Suzy, and Jung Haein

Short Synopsis:  For as long as she can remember, Nam Hongjoo (Suzy) has dreamed of how people will die.  She tries to stop her dreams from happening whenever she can, despite not knowing the time they will come true.  Jung Jaechan (Lee Jongsuk) is a new prosecutor.  At his new office, he runs into Lawyer Lee Yoobeom (Lee Sangyeob) his old friend turned enemy.  Jaechan dreams of Hongjoo and stops an accident that would have led to a string of terrible events.  With the help of Wootak, a policeman (Jung Haein), the three work together to prevent their dreams from coming true. 

My Thoughts:  The main leads were absolutely stunning in this.  They all worked really well together and had great chemistry.  I’m a little bit in love with Lee Jongsuk, but I also fell for Jung Haein too, and his charming nature.  This was a really enticing drama, with how all the dreams connect, but it’s more focused on reality as well, so it’s not entirely a fantasy drama.  It’s hard to explain the level of amazing this was on, but it was a pretty high one.  The other characters were all stars in their own way as well, and it could be funny and romantic and nail biting all in one. 

7.  White Christmas

Year of Release:  January-March, 2011

Stars:  Sungjoon, Kim Woobin, Baek Sunghyun, Kim Youngkwang, Kwak Jungwook, Han Jonghyun, Esom, and Lee Soohyuk, plus Kim Sanghyung.

Short Synopsis:  At a reclusive high school in the mountains that only the top 0.1% of students can attend, eight students stay behind during the break because of a letter they received.  When they let in a psychologist who is really a famous psychopath, it quickly becomes a horrible game.  The students are stranded in the middle of a blizzard, turned against each other as the psychopath uses them to figure out the answer to; Are monsters born or created?      

My Thoughts:  If you love psychology (like I do), then you’ll love this drama.  It was only eight episodes, but the faster to watch it, you know?  It really shows how, if under the right circumstances, people’s worst sides come out.  How they can be monsters.  This was a mix of satisfying and unsatisfying, mostly because of the ending (you’ll see what I mean if you watch it), but it was kind of a sad truth.  The characters themselves were really nicely crafted, and I liked watching how they reacted in the situation, mentally and physically.  It’s a great thriller to watch.

8.  Hwarang

Year of Release:  December-February, 2016-17

Stars:  Park Seojoon, Park Hyungsik, Go Ara, Choi Minho, Do Jihan, Kim Taehyung, and Jo Yoonwoo.

Short Synopsis:  In olden days, set in the Kingdom of Silla, the Queen decides to start training a group of young men called Hwarang (boys as pretty as flowers).  In the group is Dogbird (Park Seojoon), who has snuck into the city, and Jidwi (Park Hyungsik, also called Sam Maek Jong, but I just call him the Prince because why not), who is really the Prince.  Other trainees include Ban Ryu (Do Jihan) and Sooho (Choi Minho), who are enemies, as well as Yeo Wool (Jo Yoonwoo) who is the prettiest boy around.  Hansung (Kim Taehyung) is the son of a rich man who signs up because he thinks it will be fun.  

My Thoughts:  Hwarang was the first kdrama I ever watched, well, I guess it’s technically not, but it is the first kdrama I ever finished.  I have to admit, parts of this were dull and boring (like all the talks the old people nobody cares about had), but otherwise it was fun.  I mostly watched it because of Taehyung and Minho, but I stayed for the Prince and Ban Ryu and Yeo Wool, who really deserved more screentime.  The romance was…well, it was a definite love triangle, I can tell you that, and it was a little annoying at times, but mostly kind of funny to watch.  If you like historical dramas, you’ll probably like this, and even if you don’t (like me), you’ll probably still like this.   

9.  Sassy Go Go (Cheer Up!)

Year of Release:  October-November, 2015  

Stars:  Jung Eunji, Ji Soo, Kim Wongeun, Chae Soobin, and Cha Hakyeon.

Short Synopsis:  Yeondoo (Jung Eunji) is the leader of a dance team at a high school that focuses more on academics than it does sports.  Their enemy is the other dance/cheerleading team, lead by Kim Yeol (Kim Wongeun).  When an accident causes both team’s to be dismantled, they come to a compromise to combine teams to perform at an upcoming competition. 

My Thoughts:  This is a really good drama about growing up and making new friendships while keeping the old.  It’s really touching, with a good amount of nostalgia and bitter sweetness mixed in.  This was also only twelve episodes, but you never wanted to miss a second of it.  The way the characters are built is something I feel a lot of high schoolers can relate to these days, making it more real to watchers.  

10.  Shut Up! Flower Boy Band

Year of Release:  January-March, 2012

Stars:  Sungjoon, L (Kim Myungsoo), Kim Minsuk, Lee Hyunjae, Yoo Minkyu, Kim Yerim, Jo Boah, Jung Euichul, and Lee Minki (cameo)

Short Synopsis:  Byunghee (Lee Minki), Jihyuk (Sungjoon), Hyunsoo (Kim Myungsoo), Doil (Lee Hyunjae), Hajin (Yoo Minkyu), and Kyungjong (KIm Minsuk) are in a self created band together.  When their school closes down due to redevelopment, the five are transferred to a high school where there is a rival band lead by Seunghoon (Jung Euichul).  Seunghoon’s friends is a girl named Sooah (Jo Boah), who is Byunghee’s friend.  The bands enter a fierce rivalry.

My Thoughts:  Sorry that the synopsis is so vague, I had to avoid a spoiler (which happens in episode two but who cares).  Though points of this show could get a little boring, Jihyuk and Sooah are really sweet together, and the whole band’s dynamic is really great.  All the actors did a good job, and the bromance is a mix of sad and funny (but only funny at times).  It does a good show of growing up and what fame can do to people, also how people grow apart or grow closer.  I personally loved Hyunsoo and Yerim’s relationship the most (maybe I just love L a lot, but he is a talented actor).

Alternative 2018 Year End Kpop Awards

ᴮᴱᶜᴬᵁˢᴱ ᴬᵂᴬᴿᴰ ˢᴴᴼᵂˢ ᴬᴿᴱ ᴼᵛᴱᴿᴿᴬᵀᴱᴰ

Bisexual Icon Award Nominees:

Step on me unnies Award Nominees:

Finna Woke Award Nominees:

“This is a cute song but I can probably twerk to this” Nominees:

Comeback that saved 2018 Nominees:

Comeback that made me bald Nominees:

2018 Hoe Anthem:

Sarangeul haetda uriga manna Nominees:

Made my heart bust a nut Award Nominees:

Top Iconic Icons of All Time Nominees:

Girlgroups That has a lot in store and you should stab homie Nominees:

Solo artists that give me will to live Nominees:

Thirdwheel of the year Nominees:

Comebacksthat sent my wig to Jupiter and Back Nominees:

Debut that made me thankful I’m alive in 2018 Nominees:

People that deserve to get smacked the fuck up :

181112 Spotify KPOP’s Twitter Update

Article 13 has been approved by EU. It’s worse than Net Neutrality has ever been. I don’t even know if we will have any access to Tumblr, Pinterest, Ao3 or even Instagram. Memes are probably dead, just like reactions, fanfictions and gifsets. Everyone in EU is in danger that they will not have access to their favorite sites. But I haven’t seen a SINGLE post about it on my dash because Americans doesn’t give a damn.

Also, I’m in Europe and ngl, had no idea this was even an article up for debate let alone it being fucking passed.

Don’t panic! This was expected at this stage and it is only the beginning. If you are a European and feel passionate about this, please keep on reading and help!

So what has happened so far … the Commission has drafted up a long overdue copyright reform. https://eur-lex.europa.eu/procedure/EN/2016_280 It contains a lot of good, and some bad: mainly Article 11 and 13.

This was put forward as a whole to the European Parlament, where it was voted down on the 5th of July 2018

This meant, this will not go through the fast way, and will be subject to scrutiny and change. 

The Commission made some alterations https://eur-lex.europa.eu/procedure/EN/2016_280 and put it forward again. If Parlament would have voted it down again, it probably would have meant back to the drawing board, but most people (including me) agree that Europe does need copyright reform, so on the second vote it passed the first step:

So what happens now? 

This will now go into what is called the Trilogue, where Commission, Parlament and representatives of all national governments will sit together to make alterations until everybody is happy implementing the regulation.

This means we can now influence this via our MEPs and our National Government!

In countries that are red, your government is likely to support Article 13.

What to do now?

There are a lot of organisations that organise actions against article 13. Check out their websites and get in touch with your MEP or local government and let them know you are unhappy about this.

… and many many more, just google to find one in your country.

Also, as @asthesea-breezehitsmylungs pointed out, a lot of people are not aware of this going on. So make them aware! Share the memes and point them to the petitions. And don’t just complain how shit this is, get in touch with your politicians!

and here we have han jisung accidentally turning on a loud toy, trying to hide it and being caught by felix

Master Post of Calming Gifs

I can’t believe I forgot all about this episode!

There is a real legend about the Boto (freshwater dolphins) who show up on summer nights at parties, looking for and flirting with potential friends, to take them down to the riverside. Now, in many versions of the legend, the Boto takes the form of a man on the hunt for women (in some cases looking to impregnate the women before returning to the sea), as is often the case with trickster shapeshifters…

…but the Wild Thornberrys interestingly chose to make the Boto take the form of a woman instead! The script is couched in 1998-Nickelodeon-coded language so that it avoids saying what it actually is, but yep, you can’t convince me it wasn’t about Debbie being gay for a dolphin girl.

Headcanon accepted!

i’ve never seen this episode but it looks… really gay… oh my god

I loved this episode, because dolphins

Sketchy commission of Mikasa for Selena 🖤 @micasaas

You are like little baby watch this

Ghost of you

Anna O. Photography

 (“This cute little star constellations edited onto something that is usually said to be ugly can make you feel better about your body image. This series is about taking a negative and making it positive. ” - Constellations by Jamie Rose, view the full project here)

Melissa Acedera