@sexual-texts (via sexual-texts)

yas im on a roll 😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊

Someone stop my father

November 8th, 2016 or as i like to call it

the biggest and longest panic attack of the year

(via custom-cruiser)

Ricky Gervais (via unzo)

"You only follow hockey for hot guys," says male.

As we get closer to the return of hockey season, once again this refrain starts to show up more and more. So watch your toes while I drag my soap box out, kids.

Hey dickbag dudes who have this attitude, put down your NHL 16 game controller, pull up your pants, and listen up.

Sure, there are ladies who like hockey only for the eye candy. I’m guessing, however, that the ice girls aren’t there for the benefit of female fans. So glass houses and all that.

HOWEVER,

I know women in this fandom that have been miles ahead of the official announcement of a player as injured because they study the way a player skates, shoots, shifts his weight, his response times every game, and how he speaks to the media post game. Probably just because he’s cute though right?

I know women in this fandom that can tell you stats for players from the nineties and can describe every goal of the USA vs CANADA game in the Vancouver Olympics. They can also spout off who had what draft picks in a given year, who signed those picks, and how many goals those players retired with. Boys, can you tell me who the losing goalie was in the 2010 Cup Finals Game Six? Take your time - I will wait.

I know women in this fandom that absolutely dominate and humiliate males in fantasy hockey. They put together teams so amazing that it is kind of just embarrassing. I’m sure they just picked based on dimples and eye color though.

I know women in this fandom that not only can explain Corsi better than most male sports reporters, but actually know where an individual player stands. These same women understand and could maneuver a salary cap better than Stan Bowman. Coincidence right?

Girls/ladies - don’t ever hide your knowledge and love of this sport just because a man wants to minimize you. You are the reason this sport is growing in popularity and good for you if you also happen to think Patrick Sharp is beautiful. That doesn’t mean you don’t know his stats for the past five years and where his weakest spot on the ice is.

And with all do respect, if you are one of these guys, you should be mortified by your ridiculous dismissive crap. But that’s okay. You go on back to reading through your highly educational and not at all double standard Maxim and Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Editions – female hockey fans will continue to do the heavy lifting.

Ever talk to someone and you just

sexual texts on your dash?

HELLO ALL!!! FALL IS JUST AROUND THE CORNER AND YOU’LL GET TO WEAR JEANS AND LONG SLEEVE SHIRTS AND SWEATERS!!! YOU WONT GET ALL HOT JUST WALKING OUTSIDE FOR 3 minUTES!! THE LEAVES WILL BE CHANGING AND COFFEE WILL BE APPROPRIATE AT 10AM AND 10PM!! THERE WILL BE BETTER DAYS AHEAD. I’m exited for us!