The Universe is in us

People without glasses are really out here seeing for free

Oh my god I really do have to pay to see what the fuck

hope your pets stay healthy in 2017

I almost didn’t blog this and felt guilty

Not risking it

I didn’t reblog this earlier this year and my dog is unwell, don’t risk it

yes I am fully aware that I’m The Worst™ but I still wanna be like……. loved and stuff

basically

me throughout the year: if only i could justify buying this Thing :/ Maybe christmas or my birthday.

my mom: give me a list of things you want for christmas/your birthday

me: i have never wanted for anything ever in my entire life

Why can’t I stop watching this

I swear to god I’ve watched this like fifty times and I can’t stop laughing

He l p m e

I forgot I reblogged this to my main and I’m dYING

I ghostwrote this

me while i’m just living my life: yeah.. i don’t get it. just don’t understand any of this. like i just………………………………… don’t get it

This is the money Patrick. Reblog so money will come your way

“I’m getting back in line.”

OKAY but i just reblogged this last night and guess what i got today from my workplace’s self-audit!

THANK YOU PATRICK FOR FREE MONEY

BLESS ME PATRICK

PATRICK I HAVE NEVER STRAYED YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVED YOU

@billshitposts

*rolls sleeves* aight dude lets get me some money

Can i just *Gets in line*…there

Y'all I reblogged this and got $240 in tips in one day at work so 🤔🤔🤔

im going to bed for a week

Straight boys be like

Breaking news: Straight men tell girls to smile because they hate to see a sour face. Same straight men pissed as fuck when you don’t smile at them because they interpret every nice gesture as an invitation for sex.

The reason I stay up late is because I don’t want my free time to end and tomorrow to start

my favorite part of the little mermaid is at the end when triton turns ariel human and he also magically whips her up this slinky lavender sequin dress with the cowl neck detail 

because she’s couture, serving tuna serving fish.

i love the internet