Pig #1: *Wakes up*

Pig #2: Hey, you're finally up... I have an idea

Pig #3: Let's run around Mama

amen brother…

Yeah man last time i went on spotify they were straight up out of music

if i was famous id make it my hobby to search for every celebrity x reader about me just so i could comment “i wouldnt do that.”

DONT CLICK ON THAT!!! whew. sorry. just be careful.. many people dont know that .pdf stands for “poison dart frog.”

me after smoking half a bowl and drinking one bourbon on a weeknight

me after taking Yak tranquilizers in a berlin warehouse

you need to change your life styles or you might pass away .

"A rare photo of a telecom technician hatching. He even still has parts of the eggshell on his head."

Last night I had a dream I woke up to find that my house had been turned into a Smart House with every wall being a digital screen including the roof so I could see it even laying on bed and the Siri voice said “Don’t worry. You are perfectly safe in your Apple Smart Home™️” knowing I have a BIG phobia of intruders especially at night and it continued with “Let’s explore the neighborhood from the comfort of your home” so it opened google maps and accidentally zoomed past a shitty jpeg of the girl from The Ring standing outside my house and it said “ignore that”. woke up laughing

complaining is literally step 1 of unionizing your workplace. not many understand this

that medieval peasant you’re trying to kill with hyper-pop is gonna make you clean and butcher a chicken and you’re gonna throw up.

HDOFJFOGNOGEPFGKKFMDORNGOGNPRJEOFNVOVJPENR

BAPPY LOBTER

if you hear someone havingng an emotional moment in the bathroom and crying in a closed stall the best thing you can do for them in that moment is shake the door really loud and growl

and I don't want the world to see me cuz I don't think that they'd understand when everything's made to be broken I just want you to know who I am

Sadako, the female ghost from The Ring, appearing at a japanese baseball game between the Hokkaido Nippon-Ham Fighters and Yakult Swallows.

i think there should be a several thousand dollar fine for making a wojak

tumblr 2016: what if a tapir sold sand, or a proboscis monkey sold fruit

tumblr 2023: what if prototype jack from tekken had the personality traits of two specific twitter users from new york