me: IM SO DONE WITH OUAT

*sees a swan queen post on my dash*

me:

this is so apt i could cry

Ｃｉｎｄｅｒｅｌｌａ Ｒｏｌｅｐｌａｙ

|✻| Iɴᴅᴇᴘᴇɴᴅᴀɴᴛ Lᴀᴅʏ Tʀᴇᴍᴀɪɴᴇ Rᴏʟᴇᴘʟᴀʏ Aᴄᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ

|✻| Pᴀʀᴀ/Mᴜʟᴛɪ Pᴀʀᴀ Rᴏʟᴇᴘʟᴀʏ

|✻| AU/OC Fʀɪᴇɴᴅʟʏ

|✻| Mᴜɴ ﹢ Mᴜsᴇ ₂₃﹢

ʜᴏᴍᴇ ▪ ᴍᴇssᴀɢᴇ ▪ Gᴜɪᴅᴇʟɪɴᴇs ▪ ʙɪᴏɢʀᴀᴘʜʏ ▪ ᴠᴇʀsᴇs

They have Lana play young Regina to make it more acceptable for the audience to stomach what happened to her. If there had been a real eighteen year old girl like Lily or young Emma play her god knows people would be up in arms about her marriage to Leopold or about her being manipulated into magic or about her losing Daniel. There would be none of this anti-Regina crap. She was a girl, barely an adult, and what happened to her was not alright. Protect Regina Mills at all costs.

My response to the many SQ brotp #nohomo posts:

I want to start off by saying that the amount of privilege heteros are afforded is staggering and I say this as a straight person. LGBTQ representation is so fucking important, so when y’all coming prancing in with your ‘Why can’t these two just be gal pals?’ or ‘Why do you gays have to make everything romantic?’ it makes me want to weep at this level of hypocrisy, because heteros do EXACTLY the same thing.

These days all that needs to happen is for a boy and a girl to share screen time, where invariably people are going to ship it and I assure you fewer people will bemoan others for seeing romance where they only see a platonic relationship simply because the pairing is hetero. But as soon as this equation changes, suddenly a sub-set of people are up-in-arms over how a relationship has been ruined by romance.

A&E said so themselves that a LGBTQ romance had to be ‘earned’. Like everything LGBTQ people isn’t fought for tooth and nail as it is. Like the power imbalance between straight and LGBTQ people isn’t still so vast. Straight people are so heavily steeped in privilege that sometimes we don’t see how important LGBTQ representation is.

I get that we’ve been conditioned to think in strict heteronormative terms and it’s very difficult to see past the structure that’s so heavily ingrained in our society, but if you’ve been informed and educated, if you know that there’s a faction of people out there who perceive a non-hetero relationship as romantic where you only see friendship and ask ‘Why can’t you see they’re just friends?’, this is a form of erasure. If you say that LGBTQ people should be happy with what they’ve got, this is a form of erasure. If you tell them that OUAT isn’t the show for them because they’ll ‘never go homo’, this is a fucking form of erasure. STOP IT and NO you don’t get a free pass if you happen to have a friend who isn’t straight.

So before you make another indignant post shaming others for supporting a pairing with two women that you only perceive as platonic, think again because it makes you look like a homophobe or an asshole or both.

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"I think that in all life, there are the people who are right for you and there are the people who are wrong for you, and then there are the people you just c h o o s e." - Edward Kitsis

EMMA SWAN IS NOT GAY

EMMA SWAN IS NOT GAY

EMMA SWAN IS NOT GAY

By calling Emma gay you are erasing her actual sexuality. She has had four canon relationships with men, meaning she is both sexually and romantically attracted to men. This doesn’t mean she couldn’t be attracted to a woman, but if she was, she still wouldn’t be gay. 

Bisexuality, Polysexuality, Pansexuality.

Learn them, live them, love them. 

hmmm, not necessarily how things work. Lesbian erasure is what happens when writers deliberately interject, in every scenario, with a cis male ‘partner’ (just to quiet the critics). It’s also what happens when people who have had an experience in which they were involved with cis men because the pressures to do so are overwhelmingly coercive, at times violent, and insidious, and then have a need to see ourselves reflected in the mainstream, becomes NOT about our diverse coming out stories but instead this divide and conquer thing whereby bisexuality/polysexuality/pansexuality become set up as oppositional to Lesbian lives and WE somehow become the enemies rather than the heterosexist writers who caused the problem in the first place. 

You don’t get to smash ‘NOT GAY’ over my head without some chat about what that means:)

Emma Swan is not gay because she has had canon relationships with men. Knowing Emma’s character, if she was gay, she would let everyone know because that’s how Emma is. At this point in the show, Emma would never hide something like that. 

Let’s think about this for a minute. Dreamlight claims that Emma would let “everyone know” if she was gay or was attracted to women. However, that would be erasing the reality of her foster child existence because anyone who has either been in or around foster/adopted kids knows that only the “perfect” kids are adoptable. The more perfect you are, the better your chance of being fostered and then adopted. I don’t have time to go look up the statistics, but gay kids have a hard time being adopted. Emma may have expressed herself early on and maybe that’s why she connected to Lily so quickly, but she was never adopted, never in a home for longer than 6 months. This is incredibly odd for a blonde haired, blue eyed (?) female child. They’re usually the FIRST to be adopted. However, after Lily, Emma also just as quickly erased that star on her wrist and turned away from Lily, and I wouldn’t be surprised if she psychologically erased in her mind her own identity in order to never be hurt again.

Many of us (lesbians) have been down similar roads, even without the adoption/foster child factor. I knew from the time I was about 10 that I was gay, even though I didn’t have a word for it. I just knew that I fell in love with my best friend and that simple affectionate gestures like running my fingers through her hair got me reprimanded by my extremely religious conservative mother (I was adopted as well so I tried really hard to be the perfect child, just saying). I wasn’t attracted to guys but I dated them. I was nearly engaged to one but he was a good option up to that point because he was respectful and not handsy with me, plus he was a decent guy, smart, and my parents liked him. He was more of a friend than anything. But when he started hinting at getting married, I had to call it off. I got quite physical too with some guys, but I wasn’t attracted to them.

Again, physical BEHAVIOR is not indicative of sexual orientation. Throw me on an abandoned island with a man and I’d probably eventually have sex with him. Not because of love or attraction but just for human contact and because sex is a basic human need. I can close my eyes and imagine any woman I want in his place. Having sex with a man wouldn’t negate my lesbian orientation. One of my gay male friends had sex with a girl once. He’s still very much gay, but he was horny and wanted to put his penis inside something. She was available. That’s all it was. Just sex.

So yeah, look at the situation Emma is in. Think about her life and her experiences. How she had to probably do some extreme things to survive. But now she’s learned that she’s not only Snow White and Prince Charming’s True Love child, but also the freaking Savior, a princess and future queen of her people. In our world, when has a gay woman ever been able to be all those things. Exactly! Never! She’s trying hard to be so fucking perfect, just like when she was in foster care, so she will be loved by her family and friends. She’s doing whatever it takes to get that.

So, it’s not far-fetched to consider the possibility that Emma is gay because many of us have had experiences that mirror Emma’s life in its simplest form.

Interesting you say this because I first started noticing feelings when I was four but never had a word for it until I was ten when I suppressed it because my friends acted like it was a bad thing, and I came out when I was 14 when I met a girl who was already out & I fell hard for her & my friends made me feel safe enough to admit it. (And it was something I thought about all throughout my childhood but I wanted to fit in and I didn’t know anyone else having these feelings, especially since it was something I strictly didn’t talk about.) I didn’t date boys when I was that young but there were boys I had crushes on who were really just very good friends and celebrities who all the other girls gushed over so I did too.

I don’t think sex is a basic need, but human contact & intimacy are important and something people crave. And many people who are denying their feelings or women often try to make themselves feel something with men. So it could be a “just sex” kind of thing, or a denial thing, or a whole multitude of reasons other than actually being attracted to men or a specific man.

So I get that a lot of people think “lesbians sleeping with men” is a very tired trope, but it is so accurate for so many women. It is just as valid as women who are bisexual and their experiences. They’re all valid and shouldn’t be shamed, nor accused of erasure when it’s head canons & interpretations and has not been strictly stated in canon. And even then, there are things that we could say directly defy what they tell us. Especially on Once Upon a Time where we have this issue with so many things, especially relationships already. I also just think everyone is doing what they’re meant to - interacting with & interpreting the characters/show.

is the difference…between telling our own stories and having them told (poorly and using tired tropes) for us? I often wonder this. but yeah. policing how identity works is exactly what the power system gets off on. 

this is just generally an awesome set of meta. i think it’s all really been said, but  here’s the nutshell:

we know Emma has had romantic and sexual relationships with men. we don’t know why (choice or trying to be who she thinks she should). we don’t know what identity she uses for herself (because it’s not in the text). assuming that those textual relationships with men mean she’s heterosexual is heterosexism.

we don’t know if a sexual relationship with a woman has already happened. if one hasn’t happened, we don’t know how she would think about herself afterward (queer, bi, pan, or realizing that women are really where it’s at for her and identifying as a lesbian).

if and when that happens in the  text, we have to see how they play it out. media is impressively bad at coping with bisexuality AND lesbianism, so somebody’s probably going to get erased. but it hasn’t happened yet one way or the other.

and so conversing about “Emma is so gay” isn’t about putting a label on her, and certainly isn’t comparable to imposing an idea on a real person, so much as it’s about “this feels familiar” to people. “i’ve had that facial expression about a friend that i realized later was more.” “i’ve had those sorts of intense relationships to women” etc. whatever. 

"the swan queen fandom had the sweaters and a selfie, now we deserve something too"

no. no you don’t. because you know what the swan queen fandom had in the past three years? absolutely nothing. because while your ships were acknowledged, the swan queen fandom was being ignored and poorly treated. the swan queen fandom has been through some shit, man. the swan queen fandom faced hatred and homophobia. the swan queen fandom was attacked and minimized by other fandoms. and the fact that your ships are canon and acknowledged and you have everything you could possibly wish for and still want to make one of the only times the swan queen fandom was even mentioned about you and your little ships is wrong and selfish. fuck that.

The only thing this awesome set doesn’t show is how she put her arms out for him and let him choose whether or not to walk into them. Which wow.

Sassgina Mills, everybody — (x)

I an still dying of laughter over this bullshit.

i actually screAMED WHEN HE SAID IT I WAS LIKE NO FRIKKING WAY WILL THEY PLEASE GOD NO AND THEY DID OH MY GOD

White Out

Young Charming’s hair :

Hook attacking the ice wall with his hook :

Hook’s vocabulary reduced to just one name :

FrozenSwan brotp :

Elsa / Anna portrayals :

Almost no Regina :

BUT Regina/Henry last scene :

Snow BAMF again :

Elizabeth Mitchell :

But really tho’, Hook attacking the ice wall with his hook :

Several times :

This post is flawless

Sometimes I really wish Once Upon A Time was The Regina Mills Show. Cause her and her relationship to others is literally all that I care about; everything else is kind of just

Additional Admin Required

Now more than ever this blog is needed within the ouat fandom and I would like it to be active again but to do that I need help!

If you’re interesting in becoming an admin just send me a message with why you would like to get involved and any ideas you have. I will chat to each applicant before making a decision. Thank you!