I made this note. To remind myself to accept the heartache and accept someone else's decision. Acceptance, the last thing you do after going through all the different steps. I want to and I wish I will be able to skip all this steps and go straight to acceptance. I know I shouldn't, but I can't even imagine going through the whole process. I just want to sleep and wake up when I'm over the heartache.

Him: *laying in bed because he feels sick* “Babe when you’re done wrapping that gift can you come feel my forehead I think I’m hot”

Me:yea baby hold on.

*i head over to him and crawl on the bed to reach for his forehead and feel if he has a fever*

Him: *Smiles* “it was a trick, I just wanted you to come over here and cuddle with me” *wraps me in his arms and cuddles me for 3 straight hours*

Ok but why do I have such a sweet man? I sent him a link to a Historic home with koi ponds and waterfalls that I really liked and would want to spend a weekend at if it wasn’t so expensive, and he booked it for us right away. 😭 I told him I thought the rates were too expensive and he said “well you wanted it right? I just want us to enjoy it” 😭 I love him. ❤️

“You are my world ❤️” (an old message on my bathroom mirror left by my boyfriend

My love is so sweet. Although we live together, and are constantly around each other he still finds new ways to make me feel. He's been out on the driveway most of yesterday and today fixing his truck and when he comes back inside he tells me he can't stop thinking about me, he said even when he's fixing his truck he finds himself thinking about me and how much he wants to marry me 😭😭 I love him so much. I go outside here and there to check on him and to give him water and he's just like "I was just thinking about you baby" and a day doesn't go by that he doesn't tell me how beautiful he thinks I am or how much he appreciates me. 😭😭 I want him forever.

The day I had been dreading for the last months finally got here. After putting off your departure date more than twice, you’ve finally left. I know, I know… it was something inevitable and I understand that which is why I have been super supportive about the situation, but that doesn’t mean I can downplay my feelings. I’m glad we got the chance to spend a lot of time together, I cherish every second I have with you, I take no moment for granted. I’m glad I got to run errands with you yesterday, I just love your company. Never have I felt bored with you. When you sent me the picture of the Uhaul, packed to its full capacity, reality hit me. Tonight you’d be driving down the highway and I wouldn’t be able to just call you in the morning to take you breakfast and give you besitos. You came over today to say goodbye and when you walked in you held your army dog tags in your hand. You told me you’ve had them for well over 8 years and you wanted me to have them as a reassurance for myself to know that you’d come back for me. I know they mean a lot to you, from the 10 years you were in the army. I told you I couldn’t possibly take something that had so much sentimental value to you, you told me to please take them and to take care of them til I see you again. I put it around my neck along with the diamond necklace you gave me a year ago. We hugged, embraced each other, made love. As hard as I tried not to cry my tears didn’t dry before they hit my eyes. We spent a good 20 minutes or so saying goodbye, I love you , I’ll miss you, over and over again. As soon as you started your engine and drove away and disappeared around the corner, I was already missing you. My heart feels heavy, I hope 🤞🏼 we are able to reunite with each other soon. I love you amorcito corazón. I hope the journey to reconnecting with your kids is powerful and wonderful.