is jihoon okay…

Cassandra Cain appreciation post bcos she deserves it.

i have such a wide range of emotions, including

Don’t forget deeply, existentially sad.

Also: “sickening paranoia based on nothing”, “sudden pent up aggression you weren’t aware you had” and “guilt guilt guilt guilt guilt”

It’s amazing that being ignored can send me into such a depressive spell

Gomez gives out better relationship advice than like 90% of dudes.

Gomez Addams is a suave motherfucker who loves his wife more than his own life.

Everyone should want a Gomez. He’s p cool.

Gomez and Morticia Addams actually have a very loving and extremely healthy relationship, both in the old TV show and in the more recent movies. They were also one of the first television couples to be shown to have an active (albeit offscreen) sex life. Their frank attitude towards sexuality was shocking in its’ time, but their relationship and their family dynamic is actually more functional and more…dare I say it…sane than most families portrayed on TV.

The comedy in the show came from the family’s “odd” lifestyle, rather than from infighting and petty bickering, or worse, as was common on other shows of the time, thinly veiled references to spousal abuse. They didn’t make fun of each other or act like their children were creatures from another world. Were they strange and outside of social norms? Yes. Were they united in creating a loving home and being good, supportive parents? Absolutely.

These two support and adore their children, care for an aging mother and an estranged brother, put family before everything, and they love each other, wholly, fiercely, without reserve. They are every bit as much in love after at least a decade of marriage as they were the day they met.

Relationship goals. LIFE goals.

Just remembered in the second movie when their third child became “normal” for a period and although they were shocked and didn’t know how to handle it, they didn’t mistreat the child or love it any less. They accepted the difference, even though it was hard for them. 

Reblogged for truth.

Posts about Gomez and Morticia Addams are almost always uplifting and I’m happy to have them on my dash, but I think my favorite bit about this conversation is what Gomez is actually saying to Fester.

It’s nobody’s surprise that many of the aesthetic and thematic elements of The Addams Family in its various incarnations are influenced by Gothic tradition (not goth, that mostly came later. And not Goth, that was much much much too early), and I think Gomez’s words are a dead bullseye in terms of Gothic mentality.

The sublime is a recurring theme throughout Gothic literature. Although the word (like “awesome”) has lost a lot of it’s original luster over the intervening decades, sublime doesn’t really mean elevated and lofty (or even heavenly) as it’s often used today, but rather something possessing the power and grandeur to induce awe and veneration in the mind of the beholder. Although less than divine, something sublime possessed a wildness and power that transcended human ability to control…or even to comprehend.

Sublime is standing at the edge of the Grand Canyon leaning as far as you dare over the railing and still not being able to see the canyon floor below. Sublime is warrior-queen Galadriel being tempted by the One Ring. Sublime is waking up in the middle of the night in the heart of a wild thunderstorm.

Gomez isn’t advising Fester to treat a woman he fancies like a princess, or even elevate her to pedestal of angelic nature (who’s idea was it to equate femininity with purity anyway? What a laughable and historically damaging idea. Shame on whatever dead (probably) white dudes promoted that!)

Gomez is advising Fester that if he truly loves a woman he must do everything he can to remind her of how she’s an untameable force of nature who’s grandeur brings him to his knees in awe and terror. Just like Morticia, for Gomez.

I’ll sign off with one of my most favorite quotes of all time, because it feels suddenly very relevant:

Lavender Lemonade

My friend actually made lavender lemonade before and it’s delicious. Not sure if this is the same recipe, but stillllll

reblogging for the recipe

dealing with the worst case scenario

I feel like this could be useful in my future

BEKKATHYST SUMMER 2017 GIVEAWAY

~This giveaway is in no way affiliated with Tumblr.~

Please read thoroughly before entering!

Hello lovely Tumblr folk! It’s that time again- I have a giveaway for you all. Summer is quickly approaching, and I know a lot of you are getting ready to relax and vacation! So in celebration, I’m giving you the chance to win this large collection of items.

All these items came from my shop (minus the sage!).

What you get:

Rules:

Hey Tumblr fam, I need some help

I created this anti-hangover popsicle, have tested the crap out of it, and yes it works amazing. My friends love it, but I’m struggling with sales. Just being honest here. 

Anyway, if you get a chance please check out our website Lushzie.com I would love your feedback.

So for all my tumblr fam we are offering the popsicle that will literally end your hangovers for just $1 (to cover shipping) use code “TUMBLRFAM” at checkout. 

The popsicle contains coconut water, electrolytes, and nutrients to protect your liver and help your body metabolize alcohol faster preventing a hangover.

👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾SUPPORT BLACK INVENTIONS!

Thankyou!!! 😍😍

I don’t even drink anymore and I’m gonna get some

Thistle’s Beltane Giveaway!

Prizes

Rules

If you have any questions or concerns, please message me. Good luck everyone! Also, sorry for the poor quality photo haha 🌿

5 more hours left 🌿

This is the lucky clover cat. reblog this in 30 seconds & he will bring u good luck and fortune.

This is the money nigga.

It only appears every 587,432,258,943 posts. Reblog in 12 minutes, and money will make its way to you in the next 48 hours.

if you not black and you reblog this you 100% going to hell

Exactly

idk why i laughed so hard @ “money nigga”

deathly afraid of three things

never doing anything remotely successful again

never falling in love again

and stagnating forever, just living to die like my italian neighbors who keep fighting, they got nothing for them, just existing until it ends

5 Do’s and Don’ts of Splitting

(For the person splitting):

1. Do: check in with yourself

Don’t: ignore the other person on impulse

The difference:

(checking in) ask yourself what you feel and why. “Ok, I know I’m angry and not thinking clearly. Why did that comment upset me so much? Has this situation upset me before?”

vs

(impulse) leave the vicinity in spite, hoping they feel just as bad. delete them from social media hoping they feel just as bad.

2. Do: express yourself

Don’t: use self-expression as a means to blame

(Self-expression) “I feel frustrated.”

vs

(Blame) “You make me feel abandoned when you forget.”

Pro Tip: take responsibility of your emotions; try your best to change the use of the phrase “you make me feel..” in any scenario.

3. Do: Acknowledge urges

Don’t: Talk about urges with the intention of guilting

(acknowledgment) “I don’t know how else to feel better other than to relapse.”

vs

(guilting) “Now I want to relapse because you forgot about me.”

4. Do: apologize when you are wrong

Don’t: apologize profusely, or use self-deprecating language.

Pro Tip: putting yourself down is not an apology and makes this about you.

(warranted) “I’m sorry I lashed out. Next time, I will say it differently.”

vs

(unwarranted) “I’m sorry I’m so stupid. You probably want nothing to do with me.”

5. Do: set boundaries

Don’t: give ultimatums

(Boundary) “I won’t continue this conversation because I’m upset and need to leave for now.”

vs

(Ultimatum) “If you can’t respond the way I’d like, then there’s no point in talking anymore”

Support someone splitting: read the second part of this post here.

To learn the 5 misconceptions about splitting, click here.

To learn how to set boundaries, click here.

More advice from me here.

New Site: bpd4bpd.org

Coming Soon:

5 Ways to Repair a Relationship After Splitting

5 Misconceptions About Dialectical Behavioral Therapy

ok, this stuff is really hard to do when you’re feeling all those intense emotions!. don’t feel bad if you can’t always get it right (i sure as hell can’t). use this as a quick cheatsheet for when you’re going through the whirlwind of emotions and are about to say something you’ll regret!

-Mod K