he is not midas, you have always been golden

happy birthday to football for all who celebrate 🫶

I am not the divine masculine or the divine feminine I am the divine comedy and you will address me as such

pronouns: hee/hee

not ignoring you not replying to you but a secret third thing

forgor

dentists will splash some water in your mouth and youll think "oh a nice drink of water i was parched" just for them to suck it back out with their wretched little tube. disingenuous behavior

I put a smell on you

cats when they headbutt you

can’t trust anyone who criticises the mamma mia movie. like wtf are you even criticising. the plot?? the characterisation?? my brother in christ they put meryl streep, colin firth and amanda seyfried on an island, got them drunk and asked them to sing abba songs in the campest way possible that’s LITERALLY. IT. by this point you have to just assume that you’re the problem.

bitches be like "but we never learn who her father is!!" uh yeah we do she has Three??

Sucked into…a bagel

being in a completely normal nonthreatening scenario & environment and thinking “i have GOT to get the fuck out of here” with the intensity of some trapped neurotic prey animal

i am. inconsolable

dom who sticks their fingers down your throat, asks you a question, and laughs when you try to answer

Yes, yes, the dentist.  We’ve all been there.

group gentle weeping begins in 6 beautiful minutes

when derry girls said “when i woke up this morning i had a feeling something terrible was going to happen, and also that essentially, deep down, i’m quite an evil person.” and when they said “it’s called a hangover, clare. you’ll be grand.”