Russian pranksters strap giant wooden penis to anti-Putin satirist’s car

This is a story that involves Vladimir Putin, a Stephen Colbert-style satirist operating under a Twitter alias, and a giant wooden penis.

Since 2010, the satirical Twitter feed @KermlinRussia has gained over 700,000 followers by mocking the official Kremlin account that was first used by former president Dmitry Medvedev. @KermlinRussia’s voice is that of a childish and stupid “Persident of Ruissia,” poking fun at government corruption and incompetence. A typical tweet: “As punishment for missed deadlines, Putin will make Yakunin [a Russian official] buy several palaces in Sochi and live in them.”

For a long time, the two authors of @KermlinRussia remained anonymous, occasionally granting a rare interview via Skype. Then last year they decided to come out with a bang, revealing themselves in Russian GQ to be a pair of photogenic twenty-somethings named Arseny Bobrovsky and Katya Romanovskaya. Now known simply as “the Kermlins,” they are Russia’s most well-known political satirists (possibly Russia’s only well-known political satirists, when it comes to viciously lampooning Putin’s government), and enjoy a certain amount of celebrity.

As of yet, the Kermlins haven’t faced much serious retribution—until last week, when Katya Romanovskaya, fresh from a trip to France, woke up to discover that someone had chained a gigantic wooden phallus to her car… [READ MORE]

Of course, you haven’t been alive for 150 years, since, you know, DYING and going to the Soul Society, so clearly you mean something else.  Anyone know the actual Japanese here?  

According the version I have, the word used is 生きていない (ikiteinai). Roughly speaking, the ない (nai) at the end makes the word negative, and 生きる (ikiru, the dictionary form of the verb) broadly translates into living one’s life, so I guess you could argue that rather than saying she’s not alive, Rukia’s saying she’s not living - which is a bit pedantic, but considering the word can also carry overtones of function rather than form, I’m thinking it might be a scrap for accurate for what she’s trying to say. YMMV of course.

That is pretty much the same as the word "living" in English. The negative "nai" + living = not living. The "te i ru" conjugation is explicitly a state of being.

In other words: "I am not in a living state of being."

There really is not an extra layer of meaning here. She is literally saying she is not alive. It makes sense because even shinigami would refer to themselves as being alive. They are conscious, they consume, transform and expend energy and they react to their environment. Saying they are dead because they do not have a physical form in the sense of flesh and blood is the real misnomer here. We have been considering them "dead" because they are spirits who have separated from their flesh and blood body (or in some cases never had one, which has always been some point of curiosity in the fandom).

What she is saying here, which is part of why her explanation is so frankly strange, is that she cannot feel fear because fear is the emotional reaction of a living being. The implication is that the Rukia that is talking is not the Rukia that is conscious and alive. It is, instead, a frozen "body". A puppet in stasis, in a way. I believe the best parallel would, actually, be Ichigo in his human body. The chain that connects his body and soul was broken, meaning he is technically "dead." However, he can still consciously use his body. In both cases the implication is that there is a will acting over the body - one which is flesh and the other which is spirit formed. 

Rukia is implying that her will is not connected to her body (now? any longer? when fighting? idk). The other properties she gives of the state of her body and the world around her are examples of this, since the list is of states in which it is supposedly impossible to function as a living organism of either flesh or spirit. Both are some manifestation of energy, after all, and the cold she speaks of is to the negation of energy as we understand it.

This is part of why I said this section steps outside of Kubo's usual fare, because while bringing up more questions with each explanation is a thing he does, it is usually in reference to how things work in his world or according to his system of magic. Instead, here, we are questioning the laws of the universe. It is interesting, but it needed more relevance earlier in the story to be less jarring now. Now, the question of will, consciousness, physical and spiritual forms, etc... is being raised awkwardly and abruptly without meaning to the greater plot or even an implication that it will be relevant. He is literally just using it to explain what she is doing and while it is an interesting idea, it is a bit ridiculous compared to the rest of the world and people around her.

can someone bring capes back into fashion

we could all start wearing capes starting in march. and see where it ends up

Journalists at Sochi are live-tweeting their hilarious and gross hotel experiences

Less than ideal, I’d say.

This may become a Sochi bathroom mishaps blog for a bit. I hope no one minds.

Ahem, let me take you all the way back to these panels …

I do get what you mean, the idea that she’s manipulating Reshi, not Reiatsu is pretty weird, and the idea of her being able to function at absolute zero (even if only for 4 seconds) is, completely odd. But I think it may lay more in the idea she’s a soul, not a human. 

She’s already breaking the laws of physics (as is any character, really) by merely existing. Granted, that’s not the best excuse, but maybe it’s something to do with Reiatsu? What if ‘Reiatsu’ is the person? - Like when Ichigo ‘discarded’ it to make himself stronger, all he did, I guess, was absorb it - maybe the reiatsu people sense is merely the (metaphorically) smoke of the fire? It’s just a bit extra that floats around - the condensed reiatsu is their body, so to speak? 

The idea of damaged reiatsu too - back in the hotspring, the water gets rid of bad reiatsu and replaces it with better stuff, maybe that’s a clue?

Therefore, by manipulating her reiatsu to manipulate reishi to make her ice make her body move (if I’ve got that right O.o) that’s how her power works??

I'm sure there is a suitable explanation somewhere - although I would not necessarily base it on the idea of the existence of souls going against physics in general, because I have seen this debated quite well :)

I think my primary struggle is that Kubo has never really gone into that amount of intense detail all that frequently and often seems to leave it entirely alone in most cases. If he had made a habit of examining the fundamentals of his universe, this whole section would not stand out quite so much for its uses of them. I mean, at least her opponent is like "???? WTF" about the whole thing, because, well, valid. 

It's just that I think this could have used more thorough explanations earlier on to back up this revelation now. Also, given Kubo's tendancies, this is more than likely the bulk of what we will ever know about it, lol. So we are left with a lot of the questions you brought up and just vague sort of hope of getting a halfway understandable explanation. Ah well.

PLEAESE GHELP THIS IS ALL I WANT

lmao this is great

And for those who may find Rukia's power 'Trolly' . . .

Ahem, let me take you all the way back to these panels …

My point is, it’s been hinted at (Rukias latent/the ‘real’ power of Sode No Shiraiyuki from around 300 chapters ago, this is not just some asspul move Kubo’s decided to give her - And it’s not Just the room she’s in, I put up the Hanataro one, because it’s ALL of that building that’s been affected by her reiatsu like that.

So, aye, Rukia’s power, to me, makes complete sense :)

Here's the thing about Rukia's power that I know at least made me kind of pause: it requires a different suspension of disbelief than the other powers in the world around her.

For me, it has everything to do with the kind of explanation her powers get. Why? Well, because while every other ability triggers my "eh, it's magic" button and more or less follows the rules Kubo established for his system of magic, Rukia is straight up breaking fundamental laws of physics. 

Is that necessarily bad? Well, no, not really, but it would be more readily accepted in, say, a sci-fi series, for example. If I were watching, idk, Diebuster, I'd just look at this like I would the bullshit that happened at the end of that series. But it isn't in Diebuster. It's in Bleach. 

So is it "trolly"? Well, I think most people are going to consider that to be different things. If one of those things happens to be "jarring because it seems out of place" then that's valid. It's pretty nice to see her have such a complete fucking trump card like that, though. I have to say, though, concerns about power creep are hauling themselves back real quickly.

LoL - Avatar Lux Design by cubehero

Moonlight Densetsu by Clementine for the 20th Anniversary Tribute Album I can listen to this all day` —-

Edit: Added lyrics and translation, posted by @violettajones here, thank you! French: C’est difficile pour moi d’être sincère Mais dans mes rêves parfois je me libère Mes pensées se bousculent en moi souvent J’aimerai tant te voir maintenant

C’est le clair de lune qui me fait pleurer Il est minuit, je ne peux pas t’appeler Tellement perdue, je ne sais plus quoi faire Mon cœur est fragile comme du verre

Mais le clair de lune me fait penser à toi Tu le regardes autant que moi

Les étoiles scintillent, quelle merveille Comme notre amour qui brille dans le ciel  Nous deux réunis sur la même planète  Quelle romance, quelle merveille J’aime partir avec toi en week-end  En espérant avoir une happy end  Pour toujours maintenant et à jamais De tout mon cœur je t’aimerai Je n’oublierai jamais quand je t’ai rencontré Ton regard sur moi s’est posé Même perdue dans un milliard d’étoiles Je te retrouverai toujours sans mal On ne s’est pas rencontrés par hasard Moi, je ne crois pas au hasard Une étrange magie m’a guidée vers toi Elle nous réunis chaque fois Les étoiles scintillent, quelle merveille Comme notre amour qui brille dans le ciel Nous deux réunis sur la même planète Quelle romance, quelle merveille Quel miracle, quelle merveille Quelle romance, quelle merveille

English: It’s hard for me to be sincere But in my dreams sometimes I free myself My thoughts often jostle within me I’d like to see you now so much  It’s the moonlight that makes me cry It’s midnight and I can’t call you But the moonlight makes me think of you My heart is fragile like glass

But the moonlight makes me think of you You look at it just as much as you look at me

The stars glisten, what a marvel Like our love that shines in the sky The both of us reunited on the same planet What a romance, what a marvel

I love leaving with you on weekends Hoping for a happy end Forever, now and evermore I’ll love you with all my heart

I’ll never forget when I met you Your eyes fell on me

Even lost among a billion stars I’ll always find you with no trouble We didn’t meet by chance Me, I don’t believe in chance

A strange magic guided me towards you She brings us together every time

The stars glisten, what a marvel Like our love that shines in the sky The both of us reunited on the same planet What a romance, what a marvel

What a miracle, what a marvel What a romance, what a marvel

Https://twitter.com/shingeki_B/status/430726071743303680

Sergeant Stubby, so named for his lack of a tail, was a stray pitbull found wandering Yale campus by some soldiers there during drill.

"He learned the bugle calls, the drills, and even a modified dog salute as he put his right paw on his right eyebrow when a salute was executed by his fellow soldiers."

He was smuggled into WW1 by a soldier, and allowed to stay when he saluted the man who would later become his commanding officer.

He was sent to the trenches where he was under constant enemy fire for over a month. He was wounded in the leg by a German hand grenade, sent to a hospital to convalesce, then returned to the front lines…

After being wounded in a gas attack, Stubby developed such a sensitivity that he would run and bark and alert the other soldiers of incoming gas attacks AND artillery attacks precious seconds before they occurred, saving countless lives. A canine early warming system.

He would go into no man’s land, find wounded men, shouting in English, And stay with them, barking, until medics arrived.

He once captured a German spy. The spy, mapping out Allied trenches, tried to call to Stubby, but Stubby got aggressive and then chased down and attacked the spy when he attempted to flee, allowing Allied soldiers to capture him.

For this he was awarded the rank of Sergeant- the first dog to do so.

After helping the Allies retake Château-Thierry in France, Sergeant Stubby was sewn a uniform by the women of the town, on which to wear his many medals.

He went on to meet multiple Presidents, dignitaries and ambassadors and become the mascot of Georgetown University football.

There is nothing about this that is not magical.

"Helga’s a blonde, like her mother and sister, with her hair in pigtails and a thick black unibrow. Every day she wears a pink dress, which matches her huge pink bow which alights her dainty head. Her room is full of frills and pink hearts and a happy doll very similar to Raggedy Ann. Just from these simple descriptors, one would assume that Helga would be a sweet as pie, all American girl. That’s her sister, Olga. Helga, on the other hand, is a true tomboy. Occasionally violent but a born leader, Helga makes herself known amongst the 4th graders to be the one kid you do NOT want to mess with. However, as her mild-mannered half-Japanese best friend Phoebe knows and understands well, there is a lot of tenderness in Helga. While being tough, she’s rarely mean for the sake of being mean. She doesn’t steal, she doesn’t cheat and doesn’t lie about anything except Arnold. […]

Helga is a well-crafted individual and shows just how NOT to judge a book by its cover. Just because someone is a girl, wears pink, or wears dresses doesn’t mean anything one way or the other and this back story is significant to how we consider Helga within feminism. Helga does not love Arnold because that’s what girls do; she loves him because he showed her kindness. She loves him obsessively because he continues to show her kindness even if she tortures him. However, due to the fact that she does not want to become the butt of anyone’s jokes, she maintains this iron-clad reputation of the tough leader and keeps her love hidden from everyone; that one moment of swooning at 3 years old was seen as weakness. This is a girl who makes her own decisions, does things on her own terms and refuses to conform to anyone’s expectations”. x