**eats three raspberries* I can feel my cells multiplying. my blood is cleaner, safer. my skin……less dry. I am well. I am nourished.
Effective counter-protest.
From now on if anyone asks me why I am randomly sad…instead of saying “I don’t know” or something I’m going to look them dead straight in the eyes and say “I’ve been assigned to mourn the death of a stranger” and just walk away
HEY. HOW DID YOU GET SO BIG.
WHAT KIND OF DOG ARE YOU.
I HAVE QUESTIONS FOR YOU.
ask your doctor if shutting the fuck up is right for you
Say it ain’t so!!
i work as an actor at a haunted house and this little girl who was dressed as a cat came through she saw me and was like “no thank you please dont get closer i am already scared” and i was like alright i appreciate the good manners ill back off. so her dad picks her up and starts going down the rest of my dark hall and i just hear her yell “everybody wait! i dropped my ears” so i find them and give them to her dad and she goes “thank you but i hope i never see you again goodbye” and waved over her dads shoulder. i waved back and she gave me a thumbs up. honestly this kid has a lot of guts props for being so polite when shes terrified i hope she gets a lot of candy this year
Ravioli are just spaghetti gushers
whoever has my voodoo doll please put more stuffing in the ass
Wet baby
I’ll punch the next person that says pitbulls are dangerous
Look at that smile
They are like furry hippos
Hippos are one of the most violent and dangerous animals on earth.
same energy:
7 billion people, 14 billion ass cheeks