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everything i know is being with you

@whiskers-archive-blog / whiskers-archive-blog.tumblr.com

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I don’t know if the update has hit me yet, or xkit’s editable reblogs extension is still working from when Tumblr fucked things up last time. BUT, either way, I am now over at this new blog. This blog will become an archive. Naturally, most of my old threads (save for a few with a couple people) are being dropped, but pleaseee come follow me over there! All of my bios haven’t been transferred over  yet, but I’m working on it and if you’re already follow me here theen pff you already know who my muses are? So yeah.
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I don’t know if the update has hit me yet, or xkit’s editable reblogs extension is still working from when Tumblr fucked things up last time. BUT, either way, I am now over at this new blog. This blog will become an archive. Naturally, most of my old threads (save for a few with a couple people) are being dropped, but pleaseee come follow me over there! All of my bios haven’t been transferred over  yet, but I’m working on it and if you’re already follow me here theen pff you already know who my muses are? So yeah.
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a thank you card for cypress_tree, my internet-fandom-writing friend, who has been a source of creative inspiration and Hufflepuffian support since our happy online meeting, and who gives possibly the most wonderful birthday presents I’ve been lucky enough to receive

and I thought maybe ‘net friendship was sentiment other people might share <3

one morning reblog~

Yesyesyes

This is so accurate and true.

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PSA to ALL followers

Okay So if ANY OF YOU THAT I RP WITH leave to go rp else where please let me know. I don’t want to throw away what we have because of internet running jerks <3 <3 Please tell me. I have Skype, Email, and Kik for a reason okay

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I go on a quick hiatus to get used to my school schedule, then decide I’m going to move blogs and then...just as I’m ready to post a link to said blog and encourage all you lovely people to follow me and come love on me there, staff decides to roll out a new update that will, as usual, make life difficult for 50% of their users: the roleplayers.
So, for the time being, I guess I’m going back on hiatus and will pray that the xkit people can come up with a way to fix this because this new update will make roleplaying impossible. At least impossible in the capacity that we in the community have become accustomed to. I’ve sent my complaints to to support and got back a nifty little automated response telling me it’s been sent to their engineers (proof that they really don’t listen) and signed a couple of petitions So all I can do is wait. If you’re interested in getting a hold of me, my kik is royalyashley and my skype is whiskersrps.
And, once again, staff, thanks for bestowing upon this glorious bullshit that we so totally asked for.
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Naomi wasn’t sure if that was a terrible reaction or a good reaction. She just wanted to know what he thought. She didn’t want to make him run away as she gave a worried look. The crowd was happy, but if Ryland wasn’t then it was pointless. Seeing him come around the counter she felt nervous as she shifted a bit before she felt him hug her. She relaxed as she hugged him back before she was taken off her feet and she squealed a bit. Feeling his hand on her stomach she smiled widely. That was what she was waiting for. She was waiting for him to be happy about it as she felt like everything was falling into place. Hearing that she giggled a bit as she nodded her head. “Yes please don’t.” She teased to their child growing inside. “I’m so glad you’re happy. I thought you might not be ready, or think it’s a bad time, or I don’t know. I just didn’t want you to hate me.” She admitted as she nuzzled into him. “Apparently I’m three weeks in.” 
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It was hard to find words in his mind to describe how he felt. It was more than happiness, it was more than excitement. More than fear, more than uncertainty. A well of unnameable emotions was forming in the put of his stomach as he gently rubbed her stomach, turning his gaze up to meet her’s, “How could you ever think I’d hate you for getting pregnant? I don’t know if we’re ready but we don’t really have a choice other than to get ready do we?” Everything about life felt so real all of a sudden. He wasn’t a kid with a shop and a girlfriend anymore. He was a grown man with a business, a wife, and a child. It was scary and exciting and indescribable all at the same time, “Well, you should take a break form working. It’s better if you don’t push yourself.”

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Letting Simon kiss his head made Felix feel better as he looked at Simon carefully. “I just…I’m fucked up you know? I mean Lydia tells me I’m not but I’m just sort of am. I’m afraid I’ll fuck up my kids too. I just…I don’t know I don’t want them calling me a monster. And you’ll be a good dad Simon. I know it. You’re kind and understanding and patient. Being scared of holding a child is natural. You don’t want to let them go in case they get hurt.” 
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“They are not going to call you a monster.” Simon said firmly, holding the other’s hands tightly, “And you’re not going to fuck up any more than any other first time parent would. What we’ve both been through in our lives isn’t going to rub off on them. We’re going to do everything in our power to do better by them.” He explained, both to reassure Felix and himself.

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“I know but I changed my mind and if I did then Felix did too.” She didn’t want to talk about how their last home visit seemed to trigger both of them. She still had a few bruises. “Those two are quite cute aren’t they?” She laughed as she smiled a bit. “Well be prepared to be out coupled by Naomi and Felix then. They are so sickeningly cute and sweet together it should be illegal.” She mused as she looked at him and nodded her head. “I trust you on that. Just know that I’m the type that doesn’t care if it’s your family or not, if they hurt Felix I will punch them.” That wouldn’t change for anything. Felix was her main person and she knew that everyone knew it too. She was good in crowds though and generally a good person to be around, so as long as people were nice she was as well. “Why do you think I’d like your mom especially?” She asked curiously as she looked at him. “I thought she was. I was just gonna make this easier on Felix and have him meet her there too.” She shrugged her shoulders. “Although you’re gonna have to convince Felicity to meet her by yourself bub.” Thinking for a moment she looked over to Simon for a moment. “What are you going to do if Felix doesn’t like your sister? I mean I doubt that since Felix trusts my judgement, but still.” If that did happened Lydia wouldn’t talk to her either. The twins were still close as ever. 
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“I see.” He responded somewhat absentmindedly. And his response to the next statement, about Felix and Naomi, came out just as passive and absentmindedly as the first, “Whatever makes him comfortable.” Simon leaned back on the couch a bit, shaking his head “No one would hurt Felix. My family has sort of an ‘us against the world’ mentality. Once you’ve been inducted into the family either by marriage or unofficially, you become one of those people they’ll fight for. Trust me, Ly, you won’t find a safer family than mine.” And such had been true for as long as Simon could remember. Even when he was younger and issues in high school happened, his mother and father--and aunt--had gone to extreme lengths to get the offender locked away. They protected their own, “Because she’s like you in some ways.” He answered simply. When asked about what he’d do in such a situation, he shrugged, “Then I wouldn’t pressure him to talk to her anymore. And visa versa. I’ll still maintain a relationship with her because she’s family, but Felix doesn’t need to have a relationship with her if he doesn’t want to. I was hesitant to have them meet before because I was afraid a new person would break us apart, but since it’s not, I’m not that scared anymore. If he likes her, that’s great. If he doesn’t...he doesn’t.” It didn’t seem so complicated to him. 

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Before Felix could even say something Amelia had stomped her foot on the ground. “No you’re tired so you must sleep! It’s a rule Mr. Harris! You can’t just not sleep. That’s silly how are you going to dream about beautiful castles and princesses?” She pouted as Felix tried not to laugh. “Really Simon you look exhausted yeah? Why don’t you take a nap. I promise I won’t do anything and Amelia and I can just work on drawing some things.” Felix said kindly. He didn’t want to force Simon but he certainly wasn’t okay with Simon working if he was this tired. 
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Simon shut his mouth almost instantly at Amelia’s defiance and stern tone. Sure she was a little kid, but he was’t interested in making her more upset by crossing her. Though a small smile peeked out, turning up the corners of his mouth, as he was forever amused by her, “I don’t think you would do anything, Felix, It’s just that, I know I’ve been over here a lot lately, but isn’t it a bit...to familiar, for lack of a better term, for me to just sleep at your house in the middle of the day?” He said with a small laugh, feeling as though he was gradually losing this battle. A one on two fight wasn’t exactly fair. Running his fingers through his hair, Simon could feel his own warmth--it was almost feverish and he knew if he didn’t get some sleep soon it would result in one. But damn was pride and determination getting in the way of reason. He was here to teach, and so teach he would--or try to anyway if he could get through the door and past the father-daughter tag team.

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“Well I mean if you both think so I guess I should get to know her.” Felix said softly. He knew that if they both thought that then the girl must be really good. Letting Simon intertwine their fingers he looked at him and nodded. “That’s good.” Naomi was always better in crowds and he just felt safer with her. Most of the time he could be more social if she was around, because unlike his sister he couldn’t just hide behind her. “I know it’s a family gathering thing…but Lydia and I both discussed it and we both thought now was a good time to try.” Especially with what happened with his parents. Hearing that Felix shook his head. “You don’t have to go in a hotel if you don’t want. I think that Lydia and I will probably rent a hotel room together.” He wasn’t sure what Naomi and Felicity were doing, but Felicity already seemed to be family to Simon and Naomi was no doubt going to stay wherever Ryland was. 
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"Or at the very least meet her. You don’t have to be her best friend--she wanted to know who this amazing boyfriend I talk about all the time was, is all." He said with a small smile, confessing to the fact that he really did talk about Felix quite a bit, “Well, my parents will be happy and excited to meet you both after almost a year. My mother especially.” Simon’s mother was most invested in her son’s life; not to say his father didn’t care he just had a tendency to be more busy with his shows, “Well, Ryland and I usually sleep at the house for these things just for convenience sake, but if you and Lydia are going to get a room, that’s okay.” It’d be nice if it could be just them, Simon admitted to himself a bit sadly, but it was about Felix’s comfort, not his. He was taking a huge step--and not for nothing, Lydia would end up in the room with them anyway because where else was she going to stay?

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“Facebook is even worse.” Felicity scrunched her nose at the though. Huffing she decided to let it go since Simon did have a point. Then again when didn’t he? Hearing the next words made her smile a bit as she sighed. “You’re the only one who thinks that.” Shaking her head she looked at Simon tiredly. “I’m pretty plain.” 
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"I’m not the only one who thinks that, Fel. A lot of people ask you out, thus forcing me to worry about you.”  He reasoned with a small smile, standing to his feet and stretching before moving up behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist. He placed his head on her shoulder, looking into the mirror with her, “...I need to talk to you about something. A couple of somethings, actually.”

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Felix felt hands on his and was about to pull away when he realized they felt nice. Hearing Simon’s voice Felix felt himself automatically lean into Simon as his breathing started to even out. Hearing Simon was almost like a bell in his mind. Telling him that it was okay and things were fine. He wrapped his arms around Simon’s back and squeezed tightly. He didn’t know what he was doing but it was comforting. It was like everything was going to be okay as long as Simon was holding him. “I want to go home. I want to go home. Too much. Everything is too much.” His voice was slightly hysterical still as he just kept clinging to the other as if Simon was the only way he’d live. Looking Simon in the eye tears were falling out as he didn’t know what to do. Half of him wanted Simon to stay, this was Simon’s job, but the other half wanted him to be selfish and make Simon come back with him. Have Simon cuddled up against him while they ate Oreos until Felix felt better. “But you have to stay here. You have to leave with Bryce.” His voice gave away his confusion as everything was just too overwhelming. He bottled everything up too much. “Don’t want to go home alone.” He whimpered helplessly. 
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Attention was gradually shifting to the two of them as Felix’s voice cut through the crowd. Anyone else might’ve found this embarrassing or tried to avoid having anything to do with Felix acting like this, but Simon wasn’t the slightest bit ashamed to be called called out for taking care of his friend.  Holding him tighter as the other wrapped his arms around his back, “We’ll go home then. I don’t have to stay or leave with Bryce. It’s more important to me that you’re okay than that my reputation is okay.” He could recover from an image problem. Paparazzi pictures and rumors were nothing out of the ordinary and he would approach it like he did any other issue.

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I know I’m gonna heal and I’m always looking up Even if it’s dark, I’m gonna find the light I will smile, I will keep smiling I’m a fighter, I won’t ever give up I’ll keep flying,  I’ma just be me…  I can fly even in darkness… Any kind of scar is beautiful to me. I’m just happy, happy to be myself

Beautiful (Amber Liu) 

Sometimes I put Amber’s CD in the player when I feel like nothing else is ever gonna be good again and by the time this song is over and shake that brass comes I can just smile and dance. This song means the world to me. thank you, amber.

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