Man it really tickles me how many years women were banned from fighting in the military and now men are turning around and blaming the fact that only men have to register for the draft on feminists
Like??? Buddy…
You’re never gonna believe who set that system up
I can’t believe there are people out there who just like…… don’t care about the welfare of others. Completely unaffected by the knowledge that people are out there suffering. Don’t give a shit that there are children who will be hungry and starved because of their choices. Unbothered that there are people who won’t be able to afford medicine because of their choices. People will die and people will suffer horribly. How can they just not care?????? Or even support those choices?????? I cannot wrap my mind around how it is even possible.
there is no magic "the new generation will be more progressive as the old one dies" btw history has only had things get better because of people who didn't act like it was inevitable and acted like things needed to get better here and now and that will always be true
there was a whole generation of boomers who fought for a better world, not as many of them survived as the ones who shaped a worse one. generation warfare is not real. they are not , and have never been your enemy for simply being born before you, and as you get older the youth will not be yours because the enemy has always been the ones holding power and abusing it
“if you’re worried that you’re a bad person, don’t be! bad people don’t worry that they’re bad” <- seeing this a lot lately and i find it so goofy lol. it’s always a waste of time to categorize anyone as an essentially good/bad person but also like. you can be a “good” person who agonizes over their choices and still end up making choices that are careless or cowardly or even deliberately harmful. the act of worrying doesn’t absolve you of shit bro
imo it is one more thing in a long line of this site setting people with anxiety up for failure. there's an obsession with treating the symptom rather than the cause and just making blatant sweeping statements to assuage fears. "don't worry the cashier isn't judging you they have better things to do!!! don't feel anxious!!!" instead of "a cashier might judge you and you shouldn't care because a stranger's opinion on your groceries should not impact your self-esteem". pack it up class i'm assigning you all introspection on patching together your own fragile nerves instead of relying on the quick bandaids of ignorance and absolution
what's wild is already in the notes of this post some people are trying to argue that anxiety or worrying about "being bad" is in itself inherently harmful.
people need to stop attempting to flip mental illness symptoms back and forth in discourse from Inherently Morally Good to Inherently Morally Bad. symptoms are not moral. someone with an anxiety disorder or OCD or certain manifestations of PTSD or personality disorders or other trauma-caused disorders that cause rumination and intrusive thoughts relating to one's moral worth or goodness etc. is not inherently good OR bad for having these symptoms. they are literally just a person experiencing a symptom. everyone constantly trying to argue over whether experiencing the emotions of worry/shame/guilt is an inherent virtue or an inherent evil is literally one of the reasons these symptoms develop.
someone's emotions are not a moral issue. emotions are not actions. there is no emotion you can feel that makes you a good or bad person. your emotions do not hurt or help people. your actions do. please understand this.
My coworkers complain when we can’t assign homework over Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. As if somehow this interferes with their ability to teach their classes.
My coworkers complain that our Muslim students get to leave class to pray Salat at noon. Like, we have maybe one Muslim student every two or three years - thus far, all extraordinarily respectful and lovely kids! - and they slip quietly out of class to pray.
My coworkers find all this infuriating. “Imagine,” they cry, “If a Christian kid asked to do that.”
I calmly explain, every single time, that a Christian kid would never HAVE to do that, because every single Christian holy day is a day off school. Good Friday. Easter Sunday. Christmas day. Our entire country interrupts its financial and educational systems - schedules its WEEKS - around the Christian prayer customs and seasons.
God forbid we temporarily unclip the rope barrier and leave an opening for someone whose religious traditions vary from our own.
"In a bar, the cool blokes wear t-shirts and jeans, perhaps even with a casually unbuttoned shirt or jacket. Women are expected to wear as little as possible.
The skin gap, coined by Allison Josephs of social media non-profit, Jew in the City, is the difference in the amount of skin men and women are expected to show in the same social setting."
I think for a lot of white people, when you call them out on their casual racism (microagressions and non-overt things), they see it as a case of hurt feelings from your point of view as opposed to a discussion of harmful practices that aid the vehicle of racism. So in response, they take it as a personal attack, rather than a learning experience, and go on the defensive by bringing up a time that you made them upset as leverage. Or they defend their actions by doubling down on the behavior at hand and dismissing your criticism as over sensitivity and emphasizing their “harmless” intent. And I think that is one of the reasons why it’s so hard to address casual and interpersonal racism with the general white population (and also other poc tbh).
This whole obsession with wheelchair users struggling on foot down the aisle at their wedding or across the stage for graduation is 100% powered by ableism.
“The heartwarming story of how one woman worked for 8 months straight so she could escape the horror that is being in wheelchair for a few short minutes to struggle slowly and painfully down the aisle on her special day.”
“the horror that is being in a wheelchair” bitch it’s hella better than struggling slowly & painfully down the aisle ffs
“Despite being permanently paralyzed, her one goal since her accident has been to walk across the stage for graduation. The whole crowd gave her a standing ovation and broke into tears when she dragged her paralyzed legs across the stage with the help of leg braces and a walker to collect her diploma, after which she immediately sat back down in her wheelchair, which she will use to move around for the rest of her life.”
How the hell is this an inspirational story? This person needs better goals. And a therapist.
They’re toxic in an even greater way because as a disabled person, I didn’t realise till I was reading this how much I had internalised that. I genuinely have had feelings of fear and shame about using a chair or a walker if I get married. And why? Because I’m constantly seeing “heartwarming” stories about disabled people who shed their mobility aids for that moment. Why the hell am I afraid of using them to get married? Anyone who marries me or attends the wedding will know I need them and love me regardless.
Bless this post for making me realise I’d internalised that shit.
These types of stories teach people, both abled and disabled, that using mobility aids, especially wheelchairs, is inferior.
here are some beautiful brides in chairs with dresses they ROCK. I know a lot of disabled ppl with internalized ableism think they “won’t look good” if they use their chair, but here’s some literally gorgeous gals for ur consideration
(that last ones cute as fuck and i teared up at it)
Who needs a bouquet when you can be a bouquet?
I made my addition to this post in June 2019. Its now January 2020 and I no longer feel guilty about the idea of going down the aisle one day with mobility aids.
God bless the disabled community, y'all saved me from some internalised bullshit
This post floated by a few months ago, and I remember something to effect of there’s a difference between recovery and refusal. That is, like, I have a friend that suffered an incomplete spinal cord injury. He can walk again now, and I don’t think I’ve seen him use his chair in a few years. When he walked at his graduation, it was to show off his recovery. That he wasn’t quite ready to go through a full day upright, but he could walk across a stage, unassisted, and soon he would be able to do that every day. There’s also a difference in someone like me choosing to not use a mobility aid. My mobility is intensely fluid, especially seasonally. So, I would plan a summer wedding. And while I love my cane it can also be the biggest pain in my ass, so I’d want to just go unassisted. But that’s normal for me, at least right now. I can walk without an aid during about half of the year. It’s reasonable to assume I can make it through one day without it. All of that is different than someone that is fully and permanently paralyzed, that will never walk again, dragging themselves along because they feel that’s somehow better. Overall though, my biggest takeaway is fuck the media. Because disabled people should be able to make whatever decision they want without the media turning it into this grand inspirational story.
Disabled people should be able to make whatever decision they want without the media turning it into this grand inspirational story.
THIS.
Couldn’t pass up the opportunity to add my disabled joy to this post. Look at this love!
Taking the opportunity to add these photos of Jessica Kellgren-Fozard and her wife Claudia, from this twitter post. Jessica also has a youtube channel that’s primarily about disability and chronic illness and LGBT stuff (it’s amazing!)
I also wanna add these pictures of Ade Adepitan fucking rocking this badass suit at his wedding! Give my fellow disabled mascs some love too
look how much fun they’re both having! yes!
and also this couple, who are both wheelchair users
this is from their beautifully coordinated wedding!
This parts so important to me; I’m disabled tho not in a chair—sometimes I feel like there’s no disabled masc people at all, at least on tumblr.
My partner and I are both masc non-binary physically disabled people!! This is really nice to see <3
The thing people need to realize is that what the author intends is not the same as what the reader interprets.
Fans are absolutely capable of finding meaning and substance to thing the author didn’t add consciously.
Imagine your 10th grad English teacher telling you that the use of the colour blue represents depression. The author didn’t do that consciously, but contextually? It makes fucking sense.
Maybe the author didn’t explicitly say a character wasn’t white, but white readers always assume they are. That doesn’t mean they can’t be coded as, and interpreted as people of Color.
Maybe the author didn’t explicitly say the character was disabled, but context and sustained injuries made them disabled even if the author never conceptualized them in that way.
Maybe a character isn’t specifically said to be mentally ill, but they’re written to have experienced trauma and they’re interpreted by readers as mentally ill.
Authors have no control over the interpretation of their novels, and the argument that it wasn’t consciously and canonically written is ridiculous. Any author will tell you that half the details that emerge are subconscious.
If your subconscious is racist or sexist or transphobic, and in any other way bigoted? It will come out in your writing. And your readers will pick up on it. Which I think is why it’s so important to have marginalized people’s voices involved in editing and publishing.
Just because an author doesn’t mean something to be specifically offensive? Doesn’t mean it isn’t.
Guerrilla Girls posters from 1989, 2005 and 2012.
I know the point, this is why I’m reblogging this, BUT! in the other side, woman nudes are beautiful, men nudes… Eh… Eh…. Ew
Ever stopped to consider why you think women’s nudes are beautiful but men’s are gross? I know a lot of people who have the same mindset. When I was in college I remember a guy who was an associate saying he was watching a movie with a lot of female nudity in it and he was fine with it but got so weirded out when there was male nudity that he had to stop and turn off the movie. And do you think it’s a coincidence that most sex scenes in movies have the woman’s body on full display while most of the man’s body is clothed or off screen?
Do you think humans are born finding women’s nudity beautiful but men’s nudity gross or weird? No, it’s patriarchal socialization, female nudity is EVERYWHERE and we see it everywhere from the time we’re babies, in art, in film, in advertising. And who does this cater to? Hmm? It’s normalizing straight men’s sexuality by prioritizing their gaze and putting images that cater to their gaze EVERYWHERE while censoring images that sexualize them because heaven forbid we cater to the female gaze for once or ever dare sexualize men for any reason other than a joke.
This is also exactly why I can’t get behind how many people think peak feminism and “liberation” is sexualized female nudity and that liberating women means MORE sexualized female nudity everywhere, it’s not breaking any norms or gender roles, female nudity is already more normalized and acceptable than male nudity and that’s because guess who female nudity pleases and caters to?
There is no fat phobia without an underlying hatred of BIPOC, poor people, disabled people, mentally ill people, and/or women!
the thing about “well-behaved women rarely make history" is that the author, Laurel Thatcher Ulrich, didn’t write it about women who would be considered “badly-behaved;“ she wrote it in a book about a midwife, about women who had been largely ignored and erased from history because as a result of their “good behaviour.” So it’s not a “BAD GIRLS DO IT WELL" kind of quote; it’s a reminder to respect and pay attention to the women who go about quietly living their lives.
it’s a reminder to respect and pay attention to the women who go about quietly living their lives.
ok this is important to me. gaslighting is not a synonym for lying. it’s a type of lying. if someone says to you “the sky is green,” that’s a lie. if you say “the sky is blue” and they respond “no, it’s green, you’re wrong, your eyes are playing tricks on you” THAT’S gaslighting. the crucial requirement is that they try to convince you not only that you are wrong but that you shouldn’t trust your own senses. that you’re imagining something/hallucinating/dreaming. the abuser is trying to make themselves more of an authority on reality than your own mind, often with the goal of making you reliant on them to tell you “truth” from “fiction.”
I saw this on twitter and have been thinking about it constantly since
