If you struggle with anxiety, overwhelm, or just plain feeling like a failure, I have a mantra for you that’s been really helping me out lately:

Just show up.

I used to skip class because the whole thing was so overwhelming: I had to get dressed in something clean even though I never had the energy to do laundry, walk to school, sit in class for up to three hours, plus pay attention, take notes, and participate in discussion. In reality, I was being a perfectionist, and life would have been a lot easier for me if I had Just Shown Up. By staying home because of my depression and anxiety, I wasn’t giving myself the chance to do any of that. I was such a perfectionist that being a “bad” or average student was unthinkable, so I stopped being a student at all.

If you’re having trouble getting something done, Just Show Up. You don’t have to be employee of the month. You don’t have to be valedictorian. Just Show Up.

ime it also helps to be like “you dont have to stay the whole time, you just have to go” bc most of the time once youre there it’s fine. a lot of things are like that, like… you dont have to finish the dishes, just start them. a lot of the time once you start a task it’s easier to finish than to stop, especially if you can trick yourself like “after five more minutes if i still feel bad i’ll go home” or “after washing two more dishes i can stop for today”

even if you don’t finish the task, you started it, and by completing part of it you lessened your future workload and ALSO taught your brain that things may not be as daunting as they seem

This is wisdom! Peace!

you know what years of therapy taught me - Redefine success

so what if no one else gets how the things you define as successes are victories because you have to

so you got to work - success

you used public transport - success

you went to the supermarket instead of ordering online and didn’t just buy things you dind’t want because you got scared - MASSIVE success

Redefine success, your body moved the goal posts, there is no shame in acknwoledging that

‘Cause everytime we touch, I feel this static.

I think the VMA’s was one of Nicki’s “speak the truth, even if your voice shakes” moments, because you can see she almost didn’t say anything, and then the “hell, no, i’m not going to be quiet” part of her took over.   <3

this is why she’s my fave

BO$$ A$$ BITCH

This is so important.

SYRUP IS STILL SYRUP IN A SIPPY CUP

Ad for the Fisher-Price Movie Viewer (Starring Walt Disney Cartoons!), McCall’s, July, 1973.

They had these things at the local library for years.

I had one of these, but Lonesome Ghosts was the only cartridge I ever had for it (I asked for the others but the parents didn’t think I needed more than one cartoon). It was pretty good, though – there was no sound, but you could turn the handle either way, so you could also watch the cartoon backwards. Which I did a lot.

Here’s a question that no one ever has a good answer for: why are cashiers forced to stand? Who decided people need to stand for 4 hours straight between breaks when they don’t MOVE?

YES FUCKING WHO OH MY GOD

I can’t believe that Gabourey Sidibe is wearing my Unicorn Skirt from my clothing line. It’s amazing to see her wearing it at the #teenchoice awards tonight. Im literally in tears because it’s been a dream of me to see her in my design. Dreams are coming true! #designerashley

And now a serious "I am a college instructor" post.

Friends out there with mental illnesses, emotional disorders, anxiety issues, or any condition that might interfere with your school work:

I see a lot of posts about people being too stressed to go to class, complete homework, or take tests. Some colleges are super bad about letting you know your rights and about what resources are in place to help you out with your schoolwork. Even colleges with good resources can forget to actually let their students know about those resources! Your college will have a disability resource center or some similarly named organization that can get you a letter of accommodation. This letter and its conditions must be honored by your professors, no matter how much of a jerk they are. Please don’t be afraid to go get this letter- it will help protect you. If your chronic migraines cause you to miss classes, it will excuse your absences. If your test anxiety causes you to have problems with an online exam or in a room full of people, you’ll get extra time or a private place to take it. Are you self-diagnosed? They can still help. I’ve sent students there who have never had a professional evaluation and they’ve come back with letters granting them extra time on tests and on assignments. Many students don’t know what accommodations can be made. I’m currently working with a student who’s got ADHD and didn’t know that she was eligible for a lot of accommodations. Extra time on exams, take-home assignments, excused absences due to a reaction to a medication… the list goes on. Nobody during orientation told her that the DRC was for students who had psychological issues- it’s not just for physical disabilities. 

Not all teachers, sadly, are understanding about mental issues. I’ve known instructors who are downright mean about test anxiety. A letter of accommodation from your school will make toxic professors respect the terms of your needs. Please don’t be afraid to go to them. Don’t be afraid to give these letters to your professors- they are legally obligated to honor them (thanks, ADA!) and if they do not, your school’s administration will come down on them like a ton of bricks if you complain. I know that it might sound scary, but please don’t be afraid to be your own advocate! There are people out there who will help you if you need it. 

Bringing this back because summer’s winding down. Also remember that this letter will not tell your instructor your diagnosis. It will only tell us the specific accommodations you need! It is entirely up to you if you want to disclose your specific diagnosis to your instructor. (In the case of my student, she told me. I never asked or said that it was required or anything gross and invasive like that.) Some students will tell their instructor because of the nature of the accommodations, but this is never, ever, ever mandatory. If an instructor tells you that it is mandatory to disclose your diagnosis to receive accommodations, they are wrong. (Your DRC or whatever it’s called may require it to give you the letter, but that’s an entirely different scenario. They’re there to help you get what you need to succeed.) Once you give them that letter, they are obligated to help you out, so if you think you need accommodations, you should really consider going to your DRC and getting a letter! Your college orientation might totally gloss over this (I know mine certainly did), but it can really help you!

(Also, if you’re self-diagnosed, your DRC will probably require you to get an evaluation and some paperwork. This can usually be done through your school for free. If you’re in college and you have any mental health issues, there will often be completely free resources to get you the help you might want. I strongly encourage you to look into them- make the system work for you, not against you. Stay safe and look after yourself!)

As someone who’s had experience with accommodation letters from multiple angles, I can tell you this is really important.

Procedures do vary from place to place, but if you think it would help you it’s important to check it out. Basically you go talk to the disabilities center on campus, they tell you what documentation you need, you get it, and you work out accommodations. You then give the letter requesting accommodations to your instructor at the beginning of the semester, and if they aren’t cool with it you refer them to the disabilities center.

If you think an accommodation is something you need, ASK. It can’t hurt– you may not always need it but it’s there if you do. And instructors are generally pretty cool about it– it’s part of their job, and they get accommodation letters every semester– this isn’t anything new to them.

Kind of unrelated but school is about to start again for some folks and this could come in handy… -Kim

Please fire me. I work at McDonald’s and last week I spent 15 minutes trying to explain to an old man they we do not sell hot dogs (McDogs as he claimed it) then he threatened to report me for “withholding products from him”!

hes from an alternate timeline

the McDogs man actually proves the multiverse theory