Growing Feral

EASY HASHBROWN CASSEROLE

Really nice recipes. Every hour.

Show me what you cooked!

♦️  Natasha Lyonne in Russian Doll (Netflix, 2019)

why limit yourself between choosing between a pretty feminine aesthetic or a dark one? if persephone can be the goddess of spring & queen of the underworld at the same time so can you

All For The Game moodboards: Kevin Day (+yellow) for @wehsninski

No one wants to talk about how autism factors into the whole “gifted child to normal adult with self-esteem issues” thing and that’s how we get such nuclear takes as “you weren’t gifted or special you were just white.”

Somewhat unrelated but also it’s not a dichotomy between gifted kid and remedial kid, either. 

I mentioned in the notes of the OP that I was reading at a college level by the time I was twelve. I was reading at a high school level in fourth grade at least. I often had to take the words-per-minute reading tests a second time, with my teachers watching me more closely, because they didn’t believe I was actually reading that fast. In second grade we had to write a short story each week, based on our choice of four given prompts. I often wrote two or three instead, just for fun. (My teacher ultimately told me that I could totally write as many stories as I wanted, but I could only turn in one for her to grade.) 

I was also suffering from a learning disability that made math almost completely inaccessible to me. And this wasn’t subtle at all. I don’t mean I took longer than other kids but would ultimately get the answers right. I mean I would break down crying in the middle of class because I was so confused and overwhelmed. I almost had to go to summer school after second and third grade because I was so behind in math. I was struggling with times tables long after most of my peers had them down; I ultimately only learned them because my teacher started playing songs to help me memorize them. I still have to sing those songs in my head now, as an adult, to do multiplication.

But–in large part because I was gifted in this other area–this incredibly blatant disability went completely unacknowledged. No one believed I was struggling with math.  They thought I was being intentionally disruptive, or that I was bored and wasn’t really trying. They got frustrated with me for embarrassing them. 

And then that impacted my self-esteem, because how could I be so smart and yet have so much trouble with math? How come no matter how hard I tried, my brain wouldn’t pick it up the way it did language? I felt like I was the bad guy, like I was somehow deceiving the adults in my life into thinking I was smart. As an adult, I still struggle with this underlying fear that I’ve somehow tricked the people around me into accepting me, and that if they look too closely I’ll let them down. 

So yeah, it’s more than just “aw poor white people having to deal with being normal #whitetears” or whatever. Like white privilege and the soft bigotry of low expectations etc are genuine issues in education, but also, public schools genuinely have no idea how to handle neurodivergent kids, and neurodivergent adults are allowed to be upset about it. 

I keep saying that giftedness isn’t being in any meaningful way superior to other kids, it’s a neurodivergence. It’s about having a brain that works differently from most other kids’ and being handed a thick wad of half-baked stereotypes and gaslighty half-truths about it, and living long enough to realize how much you were lied to.

“‘Oh dear,’ muttered Aziraphale, not swearing with the practiced ease of one who has spent six thousand years not swearing, and who wasn’t going to start now.”

AZIRAPHALE LEGALLY CANNOT SAY FUCK

I WAS WRONG

follow me on twitter lol

Handmade Scarab Necklace by BIRCHpleaseHQ

sorry if i haven’t replied to your messages i forgot that i’m a human being

PSA: Minneapolis/St Paul area

lyft is partnering with united way to give free rides (2 rides, up to $25/per ride) to warming centers through friday 2/1 with code MSPJAYDEN19

also available in chicago, detroit, madison and mke

me, gay and running out of breath going up the stairs: I bet I could run a farm

me, gay with scoliosis and a joint problem and depression and anxiety and running out of breath going up the stairs: I CAN run a farm I just have to do it in my own way!!

2 yrs later:

Me, gay with a chronic hip injury, anxiety, depression, ADD and STILL running out of breath from stairs even as I type this from my bed in the farmhouse:

me, gay with depression, adhd, chronic migraines & assorted other bullshit, but also with a boulder i dug out from the garden:

sometimes all you can do is lay under 3 large blankets while holding onto a stuffed animal

there is ABSOLUTELY a difference between straight people liking gay-coded villains and actual gay people liking gay-coded villains

pacific rim really went OFF with drift compatibility. like, there was absolutely no reason the jaegers couldn’t be piloted by a single person; a bunch of teenagers managed it just fine solo in evangelion, but guillermo del toro was like “nah, we’re gonna reinvent the concept of soulmates with mecha and kaiju” and then went and did just that, the absolute madman,

if your opposition to antisemitism only extends to antisemitism perpetrated by people you already considered political enemies, then you’re not opposed to antisemitism