Ask Lyra

Bon-Bob! Liza's after me secret formula!

Bon-Bob! Where are ya, me boy?!

Bon-Boy me bob! I teched that throw!

Had to look this one up.

On the one hoof, yeah he made the first 2 and that's quite a pedigree to have returning to your franchise.

On the other, he made a worse FernGully, and that's... well, a different kind of pedigree.

"You see, Bon-Bon!" Lyra shouted over the noise of the workshop, "These magical automations can do all the work for you! It'll free up so much time! No more growing food or manually controlling the weather. It'll all be automated!"

"What about ponies that want to work?" Bon-Bon's curiosity was genuine, but Lyra quickly dismissed her with a wave of her hoof.

"Pfft, well they can try. But once the algorithms are perfected, there'll be no keeping up with a machine. Besides, the world will be better off this way. Can't you see?! A world where leisure time is all the time!"

Bon-Bon drew back from Lyra's deranged grin, "Okay... Leisure. Like sports and games?"

Lyra turned her back on Bon-Bon in a fit of laughter, "Hahaha~! Of course not! These machines will far outperform any living creature. And their ability to communicate instantaneously with one another would result in a far more entertaining spectacle!"

Bon-Bon moved in closer and placed a hoof on Lyra's shoulder, "Cooking then? I love cooking."

But Lyra only rolled her eyes and walked back towards her workbench, leaving Bon-Bon's leg to droop weakly, "Don't be ridiculous. With endless endurance and knowledge, machines will be able to test every possible combination in every quantity to determine the absolute best possible meals imaginable. That one over there has already succeeded in making a couple of things that were edible."

Lyra's leg extended without even looking toward a lifeless animatronic, rhythmically pounding on some kind of sickly green-colored dough. The noise its metal hooves made banging against the counter only added to the cacophony of noise from the other machines.

"And in only a week's time! You'd be doing yourself a disservice to even try to compete. The same goes for crafts, music, theater, reviews- not to mention cleaning, designing, building, sewing-"

"Wait wait." At Bon-Bon's interruption Lyra turned around, only to find a grave look of concern on Bon-Bon's face. Lyra had seen that look recently. "If these machines are supposed to do everything for us, what are we supposed to do."

A meek shrug was all Lyra could manage, "Whatever you want." Then the words she feared followed.

"But what's left?"

Head down, staring into despair itself, Lyra turned back to her station. "I see..." Then further, in a voice coated thick in malice, "So Twilight has gotten to you too, then..."

I swear to Celestia I'll back-hoof the next creature that says humans.

I don't know. Nothing? Like, consider it a crisis and use it as an excuse to loaf around and not do anything? Complain about having breasts? Be forced to wear clothes all the time because I'd lack a coat? Although, maybe in the summer that last bit wouldn't be such a bad thing.

Lyra: Probably pee a little. From what Spike's told me, that guy was scary.

Bon-Bon: Not somepony you'd want to meet for an afternoon lunch, that's for sure.

Lyra: I've seen a lot of "evil" in my life, and the scariest to me isn't the evil that doesn't know its evil. Or the evil that revels in being evil. It's the evil that doesn't care its evil. It can't be pleaded with, it can't be reasoned with or redirected- because it doesn't matter to them. The things they do isn't even with any real endpoint in mind, and that makes them the most unhinged and dangerous.

I don't know... 100% is an awful lot. Maybe between 80% and a 70% depending on the day. Low as the 60s if she's being an especially large ponce. Always a passing grade, but I swear she scrapes it sometimes.

Lyra is the light of my life, the sparkle in the dew, and the ray through the clouds. I was a filly when we met and I waited over 20 years for her to say "I love you".

Frankly, 100% doesn't quite seem to cut it.

Hey dude! If you want a grilled carrot, grab a bun!

Is this entrapment? Have you been trying to get me to say something incriminating?

Even if I wanted to, what could I do to Twilight? She's a hyper powerful alicorn princess. If ever there was a time I could take her in a fight, it was probably a hundred moons or more ago.

But no, I don't want to turn into a human. You know how many times I bashed my wrist or stubbed my toe when I was a human? I'll give you a hint, I bloodied up a sock.

Fingers? Cool. Toes? Suck. Human feet must have been engineered in Tartarus as some kind of cruel punishment.

Uh, this is getting a little dark. Even assuming I was prone to violent tendencies, Bon-Bon is my wife, brosiah.

If she doesn't want to buy ice cream, then we're not buying ice cream. Same basic principle when I stopped drinking alcohol. I'm not going to manipulate or go behind somepony's back for my own selfish desires.

I'd want an explanation, but the actual reasoning wouldn't really matter. If she felt that strongly about it I'd support her. That's how marriage is supposed to work... I think.

No.

His name was Marty Mcfly and he came here in some kind of car and he was super cool. I used to hang out with him and Gilda, back when Gilda was dating Twilight.

Yes all those things happened and are still canon.

Lyra: Rip out her fingernails and gently insert them under her eyelids.

Bon-Bon: Mm, Gruesome. But seriously?

Lyra: I'd eat it anyway?

Bon-Bon: If I asked you nicely not to buy an ice cream-

Lyra: There is no logical reason you would tell me not to eat ice cream. [Pause] Don't you give me that look. This isn't about being uncompromising or disrespectful. [Pause] You're more likely to just give me an ice cream than I am to ask for it! Bon-Bon! [Pause] You guys stop getting me in trouble. [Chair squeak] Bon-Bon!

Bon-Bon: Yes, I despise it completely. ... Is that how you spell despise? Have I never seen despise wrote out before...? Huh. Anyway that was a joke and Lyra doesn't act like a human, as far as I know.

Bon-Bon: I can say I didn't appreciate her going to the human world, disappearing unannounced for... what reason was that again?

Lyra: Searching for some kind of connection- some kind of meaning to... You know in hindsight it didn't make a whole lot of sense, but I swear it did at the time.

What? No dude. Turn those in to the guard.

There's no way to confirm it, but when Trixie was under the amulet's influence, she may have tried to kill Rainbow Dash. That's no joke. That thing is brain poison.

That's like if a human found a gun on the ground. You don't try to figure out if its real or not. You don't touch it and you call the police. Even if you don't like the police, that's at least something they can handle.

Bon-Bon has met human Lyra, and I've briefly met myself.

We've also met human Bon-Bon, but there was nothing posted here about it.

...

God my life is weird...

"Hey have you met yourselves from an alternate dimension?"

"Oh yeah! We've already done that!"

What is wrong with us?

...

So... The thing is... Pony faces aren't exactly... conducive... to that.

"But Lyra! Ponies have long tongues."

Not the issue, sport. See, humans have relatively flat faces that, with a slight tilt of the head, makes it easy to remain orally aligned. Ponies have snouts that open much further on the sides than a human. This makes it a lot harder to maintain alignment though lip contact without being completely perpendicular (which is a little impractical outside of CPR). You'd just kinda slide around licking the other ponies face/nostrils.

Bon-Bon: Also it's disgusting.

Lyra: Yeah not really in our culture. Definitely a human thing.