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Teenage Mutant Ninja Trans

@cutiebanter / cutiebanter.tumblr.com

a depressed, suicidal man with nothing but the christmas spirit to keep me going
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perkwunos

Dwarves shit huge and pee little… elves pee large and shit barely at all

Dwarves work in mines, their kidneys are in overdrive clearing all of the toxins and heavy metals they come into contact with. Their diet is mostly high efficiency foods, such as meat and fat and mushrooms. They probably don’t get a lot of plant matter in their diets.

Meanwhile elves’ diet is almost 100% plant matter (and all of the fiber that comes along with that) and their lifestyle is obsessed with fresh air, clean water, and a pure environment.

Face the facts: dwarves pee huge and shit little, and elves shit large and pee barely at all

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Lyrics: “Cocaine ruin your brain (ay), please don’t do cocaine (ay), cocaine ruin ruin your brain (what), please don’t do cocaine (ay)”

This sounds like a man on cocaine

ardnale

Fammmm

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neoperks

PEAS 🦆

thank you so so much for sharing this. this video is so important to me. i would sell my laptop, my house, and my sister for this duck. this video has enlightened me. i can continue living knowing such a being exists. thank you.

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my cat has been fucking playing me for weeks, playing me like a fucking harp. I feed my cat twice a day with prescribed diet food because she’s really fat and doesn’t know when she’s full so she never stops eating. usually when I come home from class she is all over me like the whore of babylon all over me putting on a pity party and trying to get me to sin and give her more food but no matter what I only feed her the amount of food for her prescribed diet. but after awhile i started noticing that she wasn’t loosing weight at all and was actually just getting fatter. so I called the vet pissed and i’m just like the fuck she’s still getting fat. so I switched her to another diet food and that still didn’t work and I was so confused and frustrated like what is wrong with this cat? so a couple weeks go by and I start noticing that I go through bags of food really fast like a week fast and I remembered how I thought that was so weird like I God honest could not figure out why the food disappeared so fast (my former naive and innocent mind) well y'all ready here’s the fucking climax - the other day my class was canceled and I come downstairs at like noonish and do you know what I see when I get down? I see my fucking cat sitting in the food bin. with my own two eyes I see her sitting in the fucking food bin. my spoiled ass cat has been eating like a fucking queen and living it the fuck up while I’m in class and then pretends like she’s hungry when I get home. and you know what’s the real kicker? when she leaves the lid gets knocked shut which is why i never caught onto her scam. she’s fucking been working the system and playing the food game right under my fucking nose like i want to scream and now I have to call the vet and the morning and explain to him how I, a well educated adult in college, got one-upped in intelligence by my fucking cat

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writterings

i was sitting with a bunch of cis people at lunch who think i’m cis and they literally had an entire conversation on how “nowadays you can’t tell who’s transgender” while i there wearing a trans pride flag t-shirt

bringing this back bc i wore the shirt again today and some guy came up to me and gave me a high five while saying “FUCK YEAH SUPPORTING LESBIANS!!!” bc he thought it was the lesbian pride flag

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pastelbunn
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