(source)

benevolent cocoa giraffe.

my thoughts on the expansion

sometimes i try to guess what the audio to weird videos will be, before turning it on

didn’t expect this one. not complaining either

YOU’RE PATHETIC

dm: so it’s pretty dark -

the whole party in haunting unison: I H A V E D A R K V I S I O N

Middle Earth + text posts

part iii

sorry i missed your call i was dual wielding 

sorry i didnt text back this sword is two handed

No offense but I send a pestilence and plague into your house, into your bed into your streams, into your streets into your drink, into your BREAD UPON YOUR CATTLE, ON YOUR SHEEP UPON YOUR OXEN IN YOUR FIELD INTO YOUR DREAMS, INTO YOUR SLEEP UNTIL YOU BREAK, UNTIL YOU YIELD I 👏 SEND 👏 THE 👏 SWARM 👏 I 👏 SEND 👏 THE 👏 HORDE 👏 THUS 👏 SAITH 👏 THE 👏 LORD 👏👏👏

That player who reminds the DM to make things more difficult  (Robin Wood, Different Worlds 35, Chaosium, July/August 1984)

romesh ranganathan is the most passionate drunk history narrator of all time

“That’s a whole bruvah!”

Just coming through

a gallon of milk but with this kind of cap:

quick suggestion

let me raise you an idea ive been keeping for years, just for this moment

The unholy trinity.

William “DTF” Riker

Someone: Looks like there’s an opening for an exchange officer on this ship full of generally hostile and war-like aliens.

Riker: RAD PICK ME

Someone: Oh shit this alien parasite will die unless we put it in a person.

Riker: I VOLUNTEER MY TAUT WELL-SEXED BODY

Someone: This traditional alien dish is made out of poop from a butt.

Riker: SERVE ME UP A SECOND HELPING YOU FUCKING COWARDS