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1T’S COM1NG…

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Syd Mills  -  http://vetyr.tumblr.com  -  https://www.instagram.com/vetyyr

“Have you determined the source of the problem?”

The engineer looked up and sighed, her eyebrows drawn together in weary consternation. “Yes,” she said, irritation marring the practiced calmness of her voice. “I believe I have.”

The Chief of Police waited for her to elaborate. He hated working with these nerd types, who knew nothing of policing but somehow expected him to understand whatever the hell a positron was. They were always so damn condescending about it, too.

The engineer did not volunteer an explanation. Damn her, he thought, and took the opportunity to yawn disinterestedly and check his phone. She wasn’t going to make him work for an answer she was being paid to supply. “Well? Fix it, then.”

“It’s not the sort of problem I deal with,” she said.

The Chief raised his eyebrow. “I thought you were supposed to be good with computers,” he muttered, aiming for her pride.

“I am a doctor of cybernetics,” she snapped. Right on target. “And there’s nothing wrong with your robot’s brain. Lie detection is an imperfect and unreliable science because human physiology is unpredictable. It doesn’t matter how advanced the software is; a positronic polygraph is only as good as the data it receives.”

“We’ve been using polygraphs for decades, miss. I’ve never had a complaint until now. If you think you know my work better than I do, be my guest! I’ll put in a good word for you at the academy and we’ll see if you have the mettle to even make it to detective. Or,” he added lightly, glancing at the faint outline of wires under her sleeve, “Maybe not.”

Her fist clenched. “You misunderstand me, sir. I have no interest in police work. The problems you have noticed are not on my end - that is, not a flaw or bias in North Central’s design. The physiological responses it measures are accurate.”

The Chief threw up his arms. “Then what the hell is the problem, O Enlightened One?”

The engineer leveled her gaze. God, he hated her. “It has been reading false positives even in control tests, yes?”

“Unless there’s a lot of weird shit we don’t know about our own officers, yeah.”

“And,” she said slowly, “Would I be correct in my assumption that the majority of officers employed in your district are heterosexual males?”

“We are an equal opportunity empl—“

“Not what I asked.”

“Yes.” The Chief said stiffly. “I believe so. It’s not something I keep track of.”

The engineer nodded. “And the women? There are women, yes?”

He shrugged. “Yeah. Sure. If this is some kind of feminist—“

She held up a hand, cutting him off a second time. “And are they heterosexual women?”

“I don’t know!” He blustered. “Maybe? I don’t know every single person who—“

“I would not expect you to.” The engineer smiled, but there was a trace of sneer to it. “I understand that the original housing for the lie detector bot was replaced with a third-party model for ‘aesthetic purposes’, correct?”

“Yes. The original face was… boring. People complained that it looked behind the times.”

“North Central Positronics produces robots for many specialized purposes,” said the engineer. “We have always embraced the belief that form should follow function. I personally disapprove of the use of polygraphs in the first place, but our lie detection models are carefully designed with unremarkable features to minimize respondent bias - the very reason they have replaced human-operated polygraph tests.”

“Get to the point.”

The engineer smiled and spread her hands. “Lie detectors do not detect lies,” she said. “They detect abnormal autonomic responses. Elevated heart rate, perspiration, and skin conductivity. Ours also detect pupil dilation, abnormal speech patterns, and changes in body language. In theory, these signs indicate a state of emotional arousal - such as anxiety about being caught in a lie. But there are an infinite number of other reasons one might exhibit those responses.” She paused, watching the Chief of Police carefully, before continuing with a small smirk. “Arousal, for one.”

“As in…”

“Yes.” She smiled condescendingly. “In the future, I would think twice about adding exaggerated secondary sexual characteristics to a robot,” she said, her tone hard with anger. “It is not necessary.”

“You’re telling me the lie detector robot is too sexy to take accurate readings?” the Chief spluttered.

The engineer stood up, shrugging on her coat and heading towards the door. “I don’t know,” she said with mock sweetness. “Do I look like a detective?”

“hey Ship what’s that you’re writing during your lunch break?” “do you ever sit down and wonder why Isaac Asimov never wrote about robo-tiddies?” “no. I use my brain for constructive purposes.”

The Pinecone Treehouse

© o2 treehouse

people i make myself look good for:

billie joe armstrong is like…the definition of chaotic good. a prime example of this is the fact that one time at a green day concert this guy in the pit was harassing a young girl so billie stopped the show to help her. however, his way of doing so was to jump into the audience, dropkick the guy directly in the face, and then fight him in a crowd of screaming fans

This is missing the best part - when he saw the guy, he tried to be like “Dude, stop” and when the man didn’t stop pushing the girl around he screamed “Fine! You wanna fight? I’ll fucking fight you, then!” and leapt directly into the crowd

There’s a reason Green Day was my favourite band in high school, and Billie Joe Armstrong is it.

Always reblog bisexual chaotic goods

AWWWWWWWW

Heather Penn  -  http://happydorid.tumblr.com  -  https://twitter.com/heatpenn  -  http://momoss.tumblr.com  -  https://www.inprnt.com/gallery/happydorid  -  https://dribbble.com/fastbee  -  https://www.instagram.com/heatpenn

Y’all know when Mulan is sitting in the rain and watches her parents silhouette disappear as the candle is blown out and then her eyes squint in determination and the music that starts to play and you see her go into the family temple and light a match and bow in respect and then sneak into her parents room and switch the scroll for her hair brooch and then the way her reflection is shown as she pulls the sword and cuts her hair?? It’s literally more iconic than any marvel movie

Y’all know that there is heavy symbolism in that scene to show that Mulan is the spirit of the Great Stone Dragon and that’s why Mushu wasn’t able to awaken it?

im sorry What!! i never knew this! my life feels fuller!!! ahhhh

Mulan sits in the rain underneath the statue of the Great Stone Dragon (who is looking down on her), and suddenly decides on a course of action. She looks up, resolved to go to war in place of her father and runs into the temple where she lights the match and beseeches protection for her family. The stone she bows to and that we see lit up by lightening strike is that of the dragon, whose eyes are looking out after her, lit from underneath by the candles. The scene transitions to the divider in the house that also has an icon of the dragon. where she replaces her hair comb with the summons. Then we see the sword hilt, also the dragon, and as she draws the blade we see her face replace it. She ties up her hair, then as she opens the wardrobe, the handles are also the dragon. After donning the armor, the view shows her facing us, with the hilt of the sword (the face of the dragon) in front of her face, where she then turns the sword to reveal her face, and sheaths it. As she leaves, we flash back to the temple, and the eyes of the dragon flash as her grandmother wakes up.

The Great Stone Dragon resides within her. She is the protector of the family.

After this explanation, the scene where Mushu cannot wake up the stone dragon makes so much more sense. I appreciate the symbolism so much more. I noticed the dragon but didn’t notice she was constantly juxtaposed with the dragon!

Canon accepted.

Fate whispers to the warrior, ‘You can not withstand the storm!’

The warrior whispers back, ‘I am the storm!’

Yes.  Accepted.  Yes.

@thelittleblackfo

Happy Pride!

literally where do i buy this fan

Love how he cracks it like a fuckin whip

This puts smile on my face!

Lupita Nyong’o photographed by An Le for Grazia UK November 2017

That’s Louis Rossman, a repair technician and YouTuber, who went viral recently for railing against Apple. Apple purposely charges a lot for repairs and you either have to pay up or buy a new device. That’s because Apple withholds necessary tools and information from outside repair shops. And to think, we were just so close to change.

Follow @the-future-now

Reblog if you:

No one will know which is it

important!!!!!

why are star wars planets more boring than earth and our solar system like sure we’ve seen desert, snow, diff types of forest, beach, lava, rain, but like… 

rainbow mountains (peru)

red soil (canada/PEI)

rings (saturn’s if they were on earth) 

bioluminescent waves

northern lights (canada)

salt flats (bolivia, where they filmed crait but did NOTHING COOL WITH IT except red dust?? like??? come ON)

and cool fauna like the touch me not or like, you know, the venus flytrap.. and don’t get me started on BUGS like… we have bugs cooler than sw aliens

BASICALLY like???? come on star wars you had one (1) job where are the cool alien species

I KNOW!! I did a report on filming locations in Star Wars last year and just made a list of places that looked so surreal they could make a convincing other planet. You covered some on my list but if I could just add a couple more:

Tsingy di Bemaraha, Madagascar

Zhangye Danxia, China (similar to the Rainbow Mountains in terms of appearance)

Chocolate Hills, Philippines

Giant’s Causeway, Northern Ireland

So many missed opportunities with cool ass things on Earth, Lucasfilms smh…

Earth is effing amazing!

Quebrada de Humahuaca, Argentina

Lake Retba, Senegal

Tepui, Venezuela

Tianzi Mountains, China

these would make amazing Star Wars planets OR fantasy material:

Tsingy du Bemaraha, Madagascar again (but a different part)

(those are razor-sharp, if you were wondering. very little of this area has been explored because YIKES)

Lake Natron, Tanzania

(looks cool, but is alkaline enough to Kill Your Shit)

Lake Baikal, Russia

(the deepest lake in the world, seriously)

and I’ll wrap it up with Son Doong Cave, Vietnam, the largest cave in the entire world.

it puts anything Dagobah has to offer to absolute shame:

(seriously, the largest chamber is 660 feet high. you could jam a fucking skyscraper in there and still lose it) 

anyway I really like caves thanks for coming to my ted talk

confession: every time I dismissed Nick Valentine to travel with a new companion (rare) in Fallout 4 I just ended up walking him home

I know he literally can’t die but I didn’t want to make him walk across the wastelands all by himself

Hancock: “Why… are we following Nick across the Commonwealth?”

Sole Survivor: “So he doesn’t get hurt on his way back to Sanctuary, obviously.”

Hancock: “You know he’s marked essential, right? He literally can’t die.”

Sole Survivor: “But what if there’s a glitch? What if there’s a glitch and he dies anyway? What if he starts throwing grenades again and drops one on his head? What if he gets lonely?”

Hancock: “You never walk me across the Commonwealth. We’re literally sleeping together.”

Sole Survivor: “Yeah well you can take care of yourself.”

Hancock: “So can Nick.“

Me: “You’re my boyfriend. Nick is my emotional support robot.”