@jdniemand / jdniemand.tumblr.com
the funniest thing about ttrpgs is that you can create a guy and say "his name is blorbo bleebus. he sucks severely. i hope that many misfortunes befall blorbo bleebus. he does not deserve to be happy." and at least one of your friends will immediately jump in to say "noooo... don't bully blorbo bleebus... i love blorbo bleebus..."
could you imagine being a man, a sis gender man, who is really into sounding other men. It's just the only way for you to get off really. But one day you meet a man that you really like, and you just connect with him on a whole other level. And you guys finally get to the point where not only are you in the bedroom with each other, but you're starting to get more open with each other too. About all the things like. The only issue is, is that this man is transgender. He does not have a penis he has never pursued any sort of bottom surgery. So he still has the whole set, the labia menorah menorah the majora Little China adequate Torres. And he also has a urethra. Now he's willing to indulge in your special weird little thing. You're sounding. And you guys finally get to the bedroom and you have your little sounding pole or whatever it is they use. But you realize some thing very quickly. Do you know where the clitorises you know where the clitoris is, but where… Is the urethra? Riddle me this Batman
i've tried answering this ask in three different ways and each time it deleted whatever i added. labia menorah menorah the majora Little China adequate Torres. Every time i try to find a new angle to work on this answer with i read another sentence that makes me wince so hard i forget 3/7ths of the english language. labia menorah menorah the majora Little China adequate Torres. i literally am trying to think of any kind of response but verbally i keep repeating it. "labia menorah menorah the majora Little China adequate Torres." it's like a spell. it's fucking addicting. it's the only way i know a human being sent it because that was for fucking sure speech to text happening right there for a single sentence. labia menorah menorah the majora Little China adequate Torres.
Y'all have you seen this????
Appreciate the fashion and please don't look in the notes unless it's to find people who you want to block.
everyone loves Predynastic Egyptian Terracotta Bowl with Human Feet. shout-out to a real one
It looks like it would be so excited to run over when you needed a bowl
walkable cities also means sittable cities send tweet
some people are responding to this like its a joke and im going to assume u are the type of people to say "its only a 3 minute walk" when i tell them the nearest bench is too far away
also anyone who thinks "3 minutes isnt THAT bad" you will be old one day. and you will wish the bench was closer
I think this is my favourite spell I’ve ever written. I’m not sorry.
You guys do know you're supposed to reblog things, right
"well i like this post but i'm worried my followers might not" fuck your followers. The entire point of tumblr is to cause irreparable psychic damage to your followers. We are locked in mortal combat on the astral plane. You must win. You Must Win. You Must Destroy Them.
Has it occurred to you those followers are the ones not reblogging?
can i get a normal google search result just once in my life
Me: [stirring my extremely saucey pasta] I think I'm going to need a spoon. Me: [gets up and goes to the kitchen, opens the fridge for some reason] I'm probably not going to find a spoon in here.
Baldur's Gate 3 (2023)
my friend who’s studying to be a nuclear scientist is facing man made horrors beyond my comprehension, and not even the normal ones you’d expect from being a nuclear scientist
like what can I even say
On the topic of Houseki no Kuni pronouns
that is all
It’s interesting how diseases rip through schools at incredible speeds despite being in an arguably modern, clean(ish) environment. I wonder if it has something to do with the whole “you need a doctor’s note to excuse your absence of even one day” combined with the average price of going to a doctor, the lack of education on things like “you’re still contagious even after the fever goes away”, and the overwhelming message of “if you don’t struggle through it, you’re a failure!”
On my campus there tends to be a problem where even I you have the doctors note professors will still take points off of your final grade regardless of how sick you are. I’ve seen people show up to class with the stomach flu, pneumonia, respiratory infections and all sorts of other contagious ailments.
Here’s a fun story:
The school system I grew up in put an absolutely ungodly amount of pressure on kids to Show Up Every Day No Matter What. Many schools are like this, but looking back, my town’s was borderline fucking dystopian. They asked me why I didn’t just “postpone” a surgery at one point— when I was fifteen— to give you an idea of how monumentally obtuse these people were.
So, in elementary school, I started having chicken pox symptoms, right? They were mild because I was vaccinated (yay!) but my mom recognized them quickly and took me to the doctor, because my mom is a reasonable human being with standards. The doctor said “yup, you’ve got those pox, it may seem mild but please for the love of god DO NOT take her to school, she is very contagious even though she may FEEL okay.”
So I had to stay home from school until I got clearance from my doctor to go back. I was an angry little gremlin the whole time, because I wanted to go to the school library and read books about the human skull, but my mother said, “no, you cannot leave this house, and do not scratch the bumps please.” So I sat at home and tried not to scratch the bumps, like a good little gremlin.
A few days into my Chicken Pox Related House Arrest, we got a letter from the school. I was far from the only person with chicken pox, as it so happened. Like… a tenth of my second grade class had Confirmed Pox. We all fell ill within DAYS of each other.
So how did this happen, you ask? Well, a kid had chicken pox, and he came to school anyway. “Ah, well perhaps they didn’t know,” you may very well say. “Maybe his parents didn’t notice!” No. No, they noticed. In fact they KNEW it was CHICKEN POX. They sent him to school anyway.
The kid’s parents…….. were, in fact, teachers at the school. And they KNOWINGLY made him go to school sick, because they didn’t want to risk hurting his precious “perfect attendance” record. They figured that since he wasn’t, like, Literally Dying, it was better for him not to miss school. Never mind the fact that they were actively endangering hundreds of little kids.
Fast forward to my freshman year of college. A kid came to class with mumps because he ‘couldn’t afford to miss’. Guess what happened? Mumps outbreak! Diseases are, as it turns out, good at being diseases! Vaccinations are phenomenal, but they can only do so much, and some people rely on herd immunity to not be killed by preventable illness.
This entire attitude needs to die. It’s dangerous. Food service workers are forced to show up sick, little kids are forced to show up sick, college students show up sick because they’re afraid of flunking out.
And on top of it all, misinformation campaigns are encouraging people not to get vaccinations! It’s 2019 and we’re flirting with the plague! Next thing you know some blogger is gonna be like “actually we should all be fucking rats and eating our meat raw, death to all science and god bless america”
Many kids at my school will show up really sick because we only get like three days of excused absences without a doctor’s note.
this is what those in literary academia call “foreshadowing”
(note the dates)
this post aged like an ice cube in an oven
I don’t think I can possibly say this loud enough but OOF
image embedded in tweet is a full bin labeled "Free Condoms, Be Safe Today!", with the aro flag on both the label and each of the condom packets, next to a full bin labeled "Free Water Balloons, Have Fun Today!", doing the same thing with the ace flag.
This is in fact a funny joke, but it's worth noting that that condoms are stronger than balloons. I say this as someone who has taken a 3 pound bag of water to the face that did not explode.
scribbles in ace diary: Do not... throw... water dicks... at ppl... unless... you... can cover... their... medical bills....
AI has problems re: algorithm training and image ownership, but this image and this image only can stay.
