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My "Fearless" Journey

@nicoledomizio / nicoledomizio.tumblr.com

Hi there! My name is Nicole, I'm 24, I'm from New York, and I am a Stage IV Hodgkin's Lymphoma SURVIVOR. I love the English language, Taylor Swift, and chicken nuggets. This blog is all about everything I've faced/am experiencing throughout my battle with cancer, my journey to health, and recovery to a "normal" life post-treatment. I once fought for my own life. Now my mission is to continue helping others fight for theirs. #ForeverFearless #HodgkinsLymphomaWho #FinishTheFight #BloodCancerAwareness "The truth is that cancer was the best thing that ever happened to me. I don't know why I got the illness, but it did wonders for me, and I wouldn't want to change, even for a day, the most important and shaping event in my life."
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Today I had the pleasure of doing some big girl solo adventuring down into NYC from work to visit the most bad ass babe I know-- my girl, my OG Cancer Sister, @kheeeeeeey ! We have a 2x cancer survivor on our hands so now all she has to do is take over the world. So, SO honored to know you and even more proud to call you my (girl)friend! Keep kicking ass. 😎🏆❤️👯💉🗽🏙 😘🍕🎗#OsteosarcomaWho #MDSWho #HodgkinsLymphomaWho #WhatEvenIsBoneAndBloodCancer #StemCellTransplantWhat #CancerAssKickerz #IDONTWANTTOBUYIT #ActuallyWereDating #ChurchBathrooms (at New York, New York)

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Why don’t people with cancer shave their heads and make wigs out of their own hair?

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byecancer

File this one with “how do bald people know where to stop when they’re washing their face” under cancer jokes I don’t find funny. I LOVE a good cancer joke. Hell, I make like 12 a day. But is there really a person out there who legitimately thought this was a possibility?

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"To me, fearless isn't the absence of fear. It isn't about being completely unafraid. To me, fearless is living in spite of those things that scare you to death."

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Hi everyone! This time last year I was getting ready to participate in my first "Light The Night" walk by the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. These were the shirts I designed for my team to wear! More than my teammates loved them so I ended up selling over 100 and donating the rest of the money to various Lymphoma organizations. I'm posting this because I'm opening the sales back up for my walk this year and hoping more people would be interested and I can donate more money towards Lymphoma research! Besides: who DOESN'T want this bad ass shirt? Let me know if you'd be interested! 💜💪🏼👊🏼

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Last night the MidHudson Bridge was lit up lime green and violet for World Lymphoma Day 😊💜💚 (at Mid-Hudson Bridge)

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The rest of the world was black and white, but we were in screaming color. One year ago today I was told that there was no evidence of disease in my body. One year ago today I was told that I beat a Stage 4 cancer. On a day that has unfortunately been associated with tragedy and loss, I am lucky enough to celebrate a second chance at life 😊💜💪🏼👊🏼💉. I'm not considered "cured" and "completely cancer-free" until I hit the 5 year mark, but this is a great place to start. As my beautiful best friend TAYLOR once sang, "...and in this perfect weather, it's like we don't remember the rain we thought would last forever and ever. " #FuckCancer #ForeverFearless #HodgkinsLymphomaWho #Stage4CancerWhat #DeleteBloodCancer #ThisLifeIsSweeterThanFiction #BeatingOdds #CauseImMoreThanStats #Gainz #EnoughHashtagsForOneDay

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vinnnieg126

For those of you who don’t know, Khloe is a brave, FEARLESS, little girl who was diagnosed with Retinoblastoma, a rare malignant tumor of the retina that affects young children. Khloe was diagnosed on October 16th, only 3 weeks before her 5th birthday. The cancer continued to come back and unfortunately, Khloe had to get her right eye removed today in order to keep our courageous little friend healthy. Please share this so that we can show our support and help bring a smile to Khloe’s face after all she’s been through. Share your pictures as well with your Fearless Khloe “eyepatch” on! Who knows, maybe even taylorswift will see and post a picture too! shann0n13

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shann0n13

I don’t think you understand how much this means to our family, ESPECIALLY our little. I showed her them while in bed today. She has been very low energy but she managed to smile & when I asked her if she liked them she nodded and smiled big. THANK YOU for never letting her fight this fight alone. taylorswift, Khlo hasn’t had much energy since her surgery yesterday but today on the way to her post surgery checkup, she sang every word and lightly danced to IKYWT. Thank you for always being a big source of happiness for her. Ps we know you have big bandaids in the house for those Meredith scratches, maybe post a picture with one on your eye for our girl. You have no idea how happy it would make her! #StayFearlessKhloe #SFKSquad

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September means Hodgkin's Lymphoma Awareness Month. Take the time to not just become AWARE, but become INVOLVED. Hodgkin's is considered a "rare" type of cancer and less than 10,000 young adults (aged 15-30) get diagnosed with it in the United States every year, but that doesn't mean you can't be one. Become involved and donate blood and bone marrow! Blood transfusions helped save my life and for some people close to me, bone marrow transplants saved theirs! Check yourself and your lymph nodes! 💜💪🏼💚👊🏼💉 #DeleteBloodCancer #HodgkinsLymphomaWho #ForeverFearless #Survivor

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Reed–Sternberg cells are different giant cells found with light microscopy in biopsies from individuals with Hodgkin’s lymphoma. They are usually derived from B lymphocytes, classically considered crippled germinal center B cells, meaning they have not undergone hypermutation to express their antibody. Seen against a sea of B cells, they give the tissue a moth-eaten appearance. 

Reed–Sternberg cells are large and are either multinucleated or have a bilobed nucleus with prominent eosinophilic inclusion-like nucleoli (thus resembling an “owl’s eye” appearance). Reed–Sternberg cells are CD30 and CD15 positive, usually negative for CD20 and CD45. The presence of these cells is necessary in the diagnosis of Hodgkin’s lymphoma – the absence of Reed–Sternberg cells has very high negative predictive value. They can also be found in reactive lymphadenopathy (such as infectious mononucleosis, carbamazepine associated lymphadenopathy) and very rarely in other types of non-Hodgkin lymphomas.

Be aware.

Source: Wikipedia
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And just like that-- 365 days of hair growth. This time last year I didn't have a single strand of hair on my head or on my body and now I have enough hair for a little pony tail, for it to blow freely in the wind, to straighten for the first time in a year and a half, to wear a headband in, AND TO EVEN PUT SOME PURPLE HIGHLIGHTS IN TO CELEBRATE SEPTEMBER AS HODGKIN'S LYMPHOMA AWARENESS MONTH. I remember sitting in the oncology office sobbing NOT because I was told I had cancer in more parts of my body than I didn't have it, but because I knew losing my hair was inevitable. Yeah, I "pulled off being bald," but what 22 year old female (or anyone in general given the circumstances) wants to do that? Growing my hair back has been an emotional process between dealing with the awkward stages and random people asking what made me decide to cut my hair so short, and even people who don't know my situation asking if it's "naturally curly like that," but it's finally at a happy, manageable, and peaceful length for me! Thank you x infinity will never be enough, but to @chelseaharris52 not only crying with me as we cut my hair off, but laughing and smiling as we did my hair again after all this. I love you. Thank you for being you. #HairGainz #12MONTHSPOSTCHEMO #NaturallyBlondeAgain #MiniBob #FuckCancer #ForeverFearless #HodgkinsLymphomaWho #Stage4CancerWhat #WorkInProgress #EnoughHashtagsForOneDay

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Dearest taylorswift, I know you remember the beautiful, sweet, and very FEARLESS Khloe. You met her about a year ago, when she had just BEATEN cancer for the first time! However, the horrible beast called cancer has come back to try to hurt Khlo. BUT she’s so STRONG, and she’s fighting hard, like usual! 

Khloe and her Auntie shann0n13 saw you on Saturday night at Staples Center, and Khloe had SO MUCH FUN that her Auntie RaRa is bringing her to another show! 

KHLOE AND SHANNON WILL BE AT THE STAPLES CENTER SHOW ON WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 26 WITH FLOOR SEATS!

Shannon is so unbelievably kind and Khloe is so unbelievably strong and they both hold a special place in my heart. I know you’d love to see Khloe again, and she would LOVE to see you as well! 

Also, if you would like to play Sweeter Than Fiction, it would make Khlo so happy because she LOVES that song so much and it means so much to her. 

(Please reblog this for Khlo, and please keep Khlo and her family in your prayers as they face this difficult time.)

#StayFearlessKhloe #MoreThan4 #NeverEverGiveUpLikeEver #1989TourLA

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shann0n13

Take us back to this night. When we all left our worries outside the walls of the Staples Center and smiled, sang and danced the night away to the songs of one incredible, gracious and beautiful human that has helped our girl and our family find those fleeting moments of happiness on some of our hardest days just through her music. I can’t tell you how many times we’ve watched this video over the past days and smiled SO BIG at the happiness we all felt for those few hours.

Little update– As you know, our FEARLESS girl had her routine checkup this past Thursday under anesthesia. We all went in hopeful and ready to get great news on our girls progress so we could just get out of there and celebrate the next day with TS. While under the doctors found that there was new tumor growth and where the tumors are, make it incredibly difficult to be treated. The new tumor is growing near Khloe’s optic nerve. This is VERY scary because this tumor is majorly life threatening and any spreading of this tumor would not be good. The results were not what we expected and it is with a heavy heart but a faithful mind, that Khloe’s parents and doctors have made the decision to have our FEARLESS girl undergo enucleation surgery in the next week or so to have her right eye removed. It is not a light decision and other testing is possible to make sure our girl is out of harms way and we are looking into all options.

We appreciate you all being patient these past days as our family has tried to process this news. We waited to share with everyone because we also wanted to just enjoy all the fun activities with our girl this weekend and not have to focus on major decisions ahead.

We want you to know that we appreciate all the positive reassurance of how brave, strong, inspiring and FEARLESS our girl is but at the same time, it is heartbreaking to take those words right now because this shouldn’t be her reality and this fight shouldn’t be the reality of any child or any human. We knew with the type of diagnosis Khlo was given that this outcome was a very real possibility but after nearly 2 years of our girl fighting this monster and beating it TWICE, it’s extremely devastating in this moment. After all the chemo, cryotherapy, lasering and countless hospital appointments, it’s come to this. It’s not fair to her. This fight isn’t fair to anyone that fights it. And that’s heartbreaking.

Also, If you are reading this we ask that you please not say anything that will get back to Khloe until her parents have the chance to talk with her about the changes happening. They are currently working together on a plan that helps our girl understand the changes she will experience and also helps themselves have peaceful hearts with this decision, as it is not an easy one. As a family, we are all hurting right now and want nothing more than to smother our girl in hugs, kisses and protect the most important human in our lives from this ugly battle.

We want to thank you so much for all the support, love and most all, prayers that you say for our little and our family. It never goes unnoticed and is never not appreciated. We are so thankful that throughout all the highest highs and lowest lows, you are always there standing with our girl and our family.

One last thing, we’d like to take the opportunity to ask right now, if you take one thing away from this, is for you to get angry with us and all families who have children fighting this monster. September is just around the corner and its Childhood Cancer Awareness Month. PLEASE fight with us for our littles. Their lives, hopes, dreams and childhood are worth MORE THAN 4%! And it is not okay that everyday our children fight, they are shown that the NCI believes they are not. PLEASE, GO GOLD so our children’s childhood isn’t tarnished with this UGLY disease for nothing.

#StayFearlessKhloe #MoreThan4 #NeverEverGiveUpLikeEver #FaithFamilyandTaylorSwift #FUCKCANCER #1989TourLA

FUCK CANCER.

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I'm closing in on "12 Months Post-Chemo."

I've almost been OFF CHEMO FOR ONE YEAR. I'm almost Cancer-Free for ALMOST ONE YEAR. This is so crazy to me. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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shann0n13

taylorswift- Fearless Khloe and the SFK family are coming for you opening night at Staples! And we are STOKED!

After more than a year after you making our littles dream come true, a few things have changed. The most noticeable is her crazy, beautiful head of hair! She has also fought and won her fight again! But in February, more active tumors were discovered and she is now currently in her 3rd battle with Retinoblastoma.

One thing that has not changed is her love for YOU. She loves telling people all about her Auntie Taylor! And she has been looking forward to seeing you in concert again since RED tour. I remember when I told her we got tickets for this tour and she froze with excitement and a HUGE smile on her face.

When you met our little, we remember you read her sign and said to her, ‘you have to hold this up at a show!’ Only problem is the sign was MUCH bigger than Staples rules so we made these instead! And when we were coming up with ideas for tour, Bad Blood came out and instantly Khlo said she wanted us to dress up as that for tour. She bought her boots 2 weeks after and has been SO excited to wear them to tour and calls them her ‘Bad Blood boots’.

We are all so happy that we were blessed to be able to get tickets and experience this night with our girl. We are extra excited to see the new version of WANEGBT! We have not seen any videos for tour, except a little snippet on mute of the USWNT walking out with you because Khlo and I LOVE them, so we are really looking forward to hearing it live and for the first time!

Taylor, you have no idea the impact you’ve had on Khloe’s happiness and how much you have helped her in her fight and as her Aunt, I thank you so much for that. And THANK YOU for all you do for all children fighting this fight. It means the world to all of us to have someone as caring and thoughtful as you to bring awareness to their fight but most of all, to bring them happiness. That’s all we want for our littles, is for them to be happy despite their fight. You make Khlo happy and so many other children you’ve visited happy, THANK YOU for that.

We can’t wait to see this show live and for one night forget what’s outside those walls. Khlo may be in a big fight but thank you in advance for the pure happiness you will bring her that night.

#StayFearlessKhloe #MoreThan4 #NeverEverGiveUpLikeEver #FaithFamilyandTaylorSwift

You know, Tay, if you want to perform ‘Sweeter Than Fiction’ on Friday, that would be RAD! You know that song means so much to us and it would awesome to hear it live.

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