W/ Mint Sauce

if I say "I have to Austin Powers my car out of a parking space," do you understand what i mean

I don't know why but I felt the need to edit them so it looked like they're lined up for execution by duck foot pistol

It’s nice that you let them have cigarettes

the 3.5mm headphone jack was the wound through which light entered your phone it was a little cave for angels to live in inside your phone and big tech got rid of it cause theyre scared of God the wrong way

they have confiscated my phone's anus

[sitting completely still in my own bed] this world is gutting me like a fish

if you don’t know the difference between a hare and a rabbit you’ve never gazed into the cold wild eyes of a hare and known that if it could speak it would speak backwards

do you ever say something and then think "wow this isnt even a bit. im just like this"

do yoo evew say someting and den tink “wow dis isn’t even a bit!! im just wike dis UwU”

This post has been UwU-ified!

i feel dirty after reading that

do yoo need a scwubby wubby? OwO

i think i do need a scwubby wubby to be honest but not from you

When is it my turn to be happy.

ping ponging back and forth between seeing immense beauty everywhere and feeling deeply like i am in hell