Beetlejuice Directed by Tim Burton (1988)

You can identify a fake redneck by their passionate support of “blue lives matter.” Real rednecks have been in at least one physical fight and/or high-speed chase with police officers and would do it again

“redneck” is a valid culture, not a euphemism for “bigot”

So this has probably already been said on this post but I dont wanna scroll through 66k notes to find it.

The term Redneck gain prominence with striking coal miners in Appalachia. They wore red bandanas around their necks to express union solidarity.

And they fucking FOUGHT police and Pinkerton strike breaker forces. It was a period called The Coal Wars.

The poor and working classes have a long history of community support and rejecting police authority.

If you’re pro-cop, you’re not a redneck, you’re a bootlicker who based your personality on a played out Jeff Foxworthy caricature. Get bent. Your ancestors are ashamed of you.

You’re teleported to 44 BCE Rome in your everyday street clothes. You’re brought before Caesar and he believes you might be from the future, hoping to bring him fortune. One day he questions you, asking “How Do I Die?”

“Surrounded by friends”

Ceasers as he’s getting stabbed and remembers:

oldest daughters have more de-escalation training than cops do

“You’ll be no good to your brother dead.”                             “I was never much good to him alive, either.”

basically, i think the general rule of thumb is: if someone REALLY wants the blood that’s inside of your body, and they’re like… a vampire, or a dracula, or some sort of mansquito, then that’s probably okay. a dracula and a mansquito are made for removing things like blood and swords from inside your body. that’s basically fine.

if something wants to get at your blood, and they’re, say, some kind of murdersaurus, or maybe a really big frog, that’s where the problems start to arise. a really frog is not made for removing blood, and your blood knows this, which is why it is so vehement about wanting to stay IN your body instead of coming out. 

unfortunately this will not deter a really big frog, because a really big frog is full of things like prizes, and value, and quite a lot of hatred, and it would REALLY rather like to replace any and all of those things with your blood, and basically by any means possible.

These words scan with a fantastic degree of confidence considering that together they make no sense at all

my personal curse is the knowledge that I function best with rigid structure and strict routine but am almost totally incapable of independently establishing or maintaining that structure and routine

Don’t forget this special feature: at the same time hating when people tell you what to do

my followers who have been here since i made this blog in 2012 watching me make zero impact over the course of 8 years:

Jake Gyllenhaal as Donnie Darko in Donnie Darko (2001) – Director. Richard Kelly

tumblr mobile

*tries to reblog a post*

*accidentally ends up creating 2 new blogs, unfollowing 5 people, following 2 other people, buying a piece of land in antarctica, and causing a global power outage*

TWILIGHT (2008) THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY | “Öga for Öga” (2020)

Malcolm In The Middle (2000-2006)

did not understand what hannibal meant when he said “you are the mongoose i want under my house when the snakes slither by” until a cockroach crawled into sight while me and a hot girl were watching silence of the lambs and she stomped it to death with her huge docs while i stood on the counter. now i actually think everything hannibal says is reasonable

Not Everything That Crinkles Is a Snack For You - A novel by me, about my pets

Sometimes I Open the Fridge For Me - the thrilling sequel

In light of the pandemic/quarantine, I’d like to bring attention to my favorite line from Jimmy Neutron: