Test Dummies

Do what you “otter” do

Earth: does the same thing it’s done for 4.54 billion years

Humans:

your bed is probably as happy to see you as you are to see it. ‘here comes the warmth slab’ it thinks

wrong it thinks “god hope this dipshit doesnt spill beans all over me again who tf eats beans in bed”

stop reblogging this new year new me i havent spilled beans in bed ONCE this year

uh oh

LIES AND DECEIT

A THOUSAND YEARS IN JAIL FOR MOTHER

I was so obsessed with cutting keys. Yeah, your standard house keys in the US these days are probably an SC10 or a KW1, which is what I usually cut, but every once in a while someone would come in with a key for some closet in their house keyed back in 1913 and they’d be like “can you copy this” and I’d be like uhhhhhh and find some keys that haven’t even been in circulating since 1970 and I’d be like “let’s find out” and usually I could manage it but then the real challenge was for the manager to price the thing

also we didn’t have a laser etcher or anything so when people needed their keys numbered or labeled, I got to put them on an anvil and hammer little stamps onto them one letter at a time and I have to say I think in a past life I was a locksmith

Yes I do like to keep cool old keys just for fun!

y’all REALLY like old keys huh

Yes

I’m just going to leave this here…

im on mobile, can someone make one that adds “jews”

Done

Cowards won’t reblog this version.

It took me a moment to check his last name and I thought the student just was 100% done with life and didn’t fear God.

It’s even funnier once you check where the “R” is on your keyboard. He must get this mistake all the time.

Photo of a nearly frozen rare “slurpee wave” in Nantucket, MA

Credit: Jonathan Nimerfroh

WHY AM I CRYING

Most effective camouflage by regional ecotype in the US.

where’s the map

TDS, February 11, 2015

Jordan Klepper looks at the issue of sex education in schools

The lack of self awareness from the woman who’s hair and clothes are hand-me-downs from the 90s

adhd is: telling yourself “ alright time to get started” every 30 minutes and continuing to not move

Art school critiques 🥴

IG: @karenfukuhara