If you’d read the book you’d know the answer to that question

stop playing the victim. that’s not even a real instrument

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book one // book three

the only D youre getting is a duel

me as a trophy husband with no qualifications 

No offense but I deserve to date a successful man I find attractive who spoils me and supports me in everything I do!!!!

Halloween is only several weeks away. You know what that means! PLEDGE YOUR ALLEGIANCE TO THE SKELETON WAR. OR ELSE SKELETONS WILL BLAME US IF THEY LOSE AND PUT BONES IN ALL OF OUR SOUP. IT’S AWFUL.

me, interacting with another 20+ year old on tumblr:

no one looks dumber than a guy who calls a girl ugly after he was just hitting on her

a guy who calls a girl a whore for not sleeping with him is a strong contender

they’re the same guy

katy perry threw the first wig at stonewall 

me and my gay friends sitting around talking about grindr hook ups

They’re literally wearing the same blouse