Praxid

@praxid / praxid.tumblr.com

Fanfiction, drawings, and some thoughts about something

rattlerinthewheel asked:

Hope your holidays were good and your new year’s will be gooder. Just stopping by to say I’m reading Down in the Willow Garden (no fanfic account but favoriting in spirit and following by way of Safari bookmark) and your take on the group’s winter is just perfect. Only on the third chapter but looking forward to the rest of it!

@rattlerinthewheel, did you send this over two years ago? Thank you for enjoying that story--it was a real expression of a lot of my feelings and I've been really gratified by how people responded to it. Even over ten years after I started writing it, people have remembered and how could I ask for more than that? Thank you, and I hope you've found a lot of other people's work that you could enjoy,

Anonymous asked:

Hello dear :) I was thinking about Breaking Bad today and that got me thinking about you and all the lovely commentary you've shared. It looks like you haven't posted in a while, so I don't know if you're still checking in, but if you are I hope you're doing well <3

Thank you! I appreciate you taking the time to remember me, we had a lot of fun with Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul. I do check in periodically, because I do get messages from people like you I want to hear from. Right now I'm making a fully annotated translation of Julian of Norwich's Revelation of Divine Love--not for the internet. But maybe someday I'll finish that Psycho scene analysis I'd been doing when I'm done.

#Thanks so much again #It's so nice to be remembered and appreciated and thought of #I hope you are on to good things too

praxid reblogged

syntheticaesthetic

I am mad that The Last of Us HBO adaption didn't exist when @praxid was on Tumblr because honestly it deserves Praxid's genius far more than The Walking Dead ever did

Gosh, it means a lot to be cared for like that. I hope I can write again sometime, but I know something I’ve taken from those years is the great kindness of my friends. Love you <3

syntheticaesthetic

I summoned you! I am a magician!

GIF by clintcatalyst

I didn't think you logged in anymore!

I may have been feeling some nostalgia for Days Gone By but our friendship now is more special every year!

GIF by muvana

I swear I have some kind of psychic tumblr powers, because the last time I logged in, someone had just messaged me right beforehand. And this time, months later, I log in the once and you’d literally just posted this. Magic!!! I’m very glad we’ve stayed in touch elsewhere so we can keep nerding up the place appropriately.

signlessacolyte

Holy hell Praxid??? I haven't seen you in years!

I still remember that wonderful Merle card you ended up sending me so very long ago.

I hope you've been well!!

Hi!!! Glad to hear from you--I remember sending that! I’ve had some health stuff that’s slowed me down, but I’m up to a lot of new and different things. I hope you’re doing great yourself!

signlessacolyte

I treasured it greatly! I had it on my shelf and showed it off regularly.

I'm sorry to hear you had health issues but I'm glad you seem to be doing better.

I'm doing well myself! There's always rough spots,but I've been well. :)

And if you get the chance, you absolutely should play the Last of Us.

It truly is an amazing game. Excellent story and characters. lots of emotion.

It’s very cool how much people are doing with world creation and characters in games these days--I know Robert Ebert really stubbornly argued they can’t be art, but I think he’s been thoroughly proven wrong. I’ve been playing The Long Dark on Steam, which I like mostly for the sandbox rather than story mode. But I think something like The Last of Us has to be on my list. Thanks!

praxid reblogged

syntheticaesthetic

I am mad that The Last of Us HBO adaption didn't exist when @praxid was on Tumblr because honestly it deserves Praxid's genius far more than The Walking Dead ever did

Gosh, it means a lot to be cared for like that. I hope I can write again sometime, but I know something I’ve taken from those years is the great kindness of my friends. Love you <3

syntheticaesthetic

I summoned you! I am a magician!

GIF by clintcatalyst

I didn't think you logged in anymore!

I may have been feeling some nostalgia for Days Gone By but our friendship now is more special every year!

GIF by muvana

I swear I have some kind of psychic tumblr powers, because the last time I logged in, someone had just messaged me right beforehand. And this time, months later, I log in the once and you’d literally just posted this. Magic!!! I’m very glad we’ve stayed in touch elsewhere so we can keep nerding up the place appropriately.

signlessacolyte

Holy hell Praxid??? I haven't seen you in years!

I still remember that wonderful Merle card you ended up sending me so very long ago.

I hope you've been well!!

Hi!!! Glad to hear from you--I remember sending that! I’ve had some health stuff that’s slowed me down, but I’m up to a lot of new and different things. I hope you’re doing great yourself!

praxid reblogged

syntheticaesthetic

I am mad that The Last of Us HBO adaption didn't exist when @praxid was on Tumblr because honestly it deserves Praxid's genius far more than The Walking Dead ever did

Gosh, it means a lot to be cared for like that. I hope I can write again sometime, but I know something I’ve taken from those years is the great kindness of my friends. Love you <3

syntheticaesthetic

I summoned you! I am a magician!

GIF by clintcatalyst

I didn't think you logged in anymore!

I may have been feeling some nostalgia for Days Gone By but our friendship now is more special every year!

GIF by muvana

I swear I have some kind of psychic tumblr powers, because the last time I logged in, someone had just messaged me right beforehand. And this time, months later, I log in the once and you’d literally just posted this. Magic!!! I’m very glad we’ve stayed in touch elsewhere so we can keep nerding up the place appropriately.

praxid reblogged

syntheticaesthetic

I am mad that The Last of Us HBO adaption didn't exist when @praxid was on Tumblr because honestly it deserves Praxid's genius far more than The Walking Dead ever did

Gosh, it means a lot to be cared for like that. I hope I can write again sometime, but I know something I’ve taken from those years is the great kindness of my friends. Love you <3

#and I really need to play The Last of Us #and watch The Last of Us #it sounds like it's basically universally praised

rattlerinthewheel asked:

Hi. Just wanted to drop by and say I remember your fics from years ago on FFN. The Book of Judith, Little Janie Reed, The Blood Done Signed my Name, Wild, all of it was so well-written, and I really enjoyed Weight too. I was a silent reader that finally got a Tumblr today to get into the fandom proper and I just thought I’d look you up. Anyway—hope you’re doing good, you’re one of the best authors I’ve come across.

Thank you--so much--for this. All of those stories are so dear to my heart, and knowing people remember them and value them is very special to me. I've really lost a lot of my creativity over the last few years--my health has taken some pretty bad turns and I just don't have a lot left I can say. So it means even more that what I did create had an impact. I appreciate so much that you went out of your way to tell me, so many years later.

#thank you so much #really #messages #Praxid's fanfiction

So, how are you guys doing? I’d like to know.

#I'd like to hear how you are #let me know

So this afternoon it struck me that some of Zdzislaw Beksinski's paintings bear an interesting similarity to Caspar David Friederich's. The colors, the composition, the subjects speak to each other. But in Friederich, you get a quiet reverence for God in nature--peace in solitude. In Baksinski, you get a more hollow emptiness out of the same kinds of spaces--like they're haunted by the atrocities of the second world war.

#Zdzislaw Beksinski #Caspar David Friedrich #paintings #landscapes #I know I'm not posting and this is out of left field #but hi and I hope you are well

I’ve had kind of a strange and difficult year. I just want to say hi to everyone I only know through tumblr. I think of you all, and miss talking to you. I hope you’re all coping well with the weirdness out there right now. I’m not around much but I do care about my friends, even those I only see on a screen.

Anonymous asked:

I read your story The Book of Judith. It was wonderful. It made me cry, actually sob. Any chance of you writing Twd Caryl story?

Thank you! And funny you should ask, I happen to have written this one. It’s 8 years old, so expect it to have a different take on canon. But I’m still pretty attached to how it came out.

#I don't know if it's exactly Caryl but it has those elements #down in the willow garden #praxid's fanfiction #the walking dead #carol peletier #daryl dixon #fanfiction #caryl

praxid reblogged

laughingpinecone said: Speaking of his last scene, got thoughts about the last-minute return of the white eyes?

You asked me this over a year ago, but yes: His eyes are clear when BOB is inhabiting him, and when BOB is absent, his eyes are white.

laughingpinecone

I am still very much interested in all your TP thoughts! :D

And here’s something to think about… “the white of the eyes” also got its share of symbolism, and in this case its presence is complementary to BOB’s… interesting. Very interesting.

Yeah, there’s definitely something going on with that, right? But I’d have to really think to decide if we’re given enough to know what it is.

The Horse (which is the white of the eyes, we’re told) seems to be associated with Judy (the one outside Judy’s diner, the one on the mantel, the sound of the horse in the desert after she ejects BOB and other demons into the world, etc. Even the one in Sarah’s living room--where we know Judy spends some quality time with her, later). But what about that is white, or about eyes... I wonder if the meaning operates on the level of poetry and less on the plot level. I don’t know.

The imagery is about as opaque as those white eyes, to me. I’m not sure how far we’re able to penetrate it from here.

#Twin Peaks #The Doppelganger #Judy #laughingpinecone #and thank you so much for remembering me #I've had an absolutely hellish year and I miss the community

laughingpinecone said: Speaking of his last scene, got thoughts about the last-minute return of the white eyes?

You asked me this over a year ago, but yes: His eyes are clear when BOB is inhabiting him, and when BOB is absent, his eyes are white.

#The Doppelganger #BOB #Twin Peaks #Twin Peaks: The Return #laughingpinecone #I did not double check but I am 99% sure that is what's going on

praxid reblogged

When we meet the Doppelganger, in The Black Lodge, he’s an identical copy of Dale. Same hair, same clothes. Same everything:

The only differences are his cloudy eyes, and his demented, senseless laughter. Laughter that doesn’t feel like there’s intelligence behind it. He feels like a true copy–a dummy. A Non-Person. Just a monster in a the dark.

It makes me wonder about him. Was he always there, in the lodge–reflecting Dale like a mirror image, as he moved through his life? Changing as Dale changed? Was he shaped like a child, then a man? Did he change his clothes, every day? Or was he created when Dale entered the lodge–a copy of that instant in Dale’s life?

Either way, he’s Dale’s reflection. He’s made out of him, and guided by him. He’s some inverse copy of Dale’s essential nature.

But… when The Doppelganger finally comes back into the lodge, twenty-five years later, something interesting happens:

He gets to keep his own identity. His clothes, his hair. The ones he chose for himself in his time in the world–that’s what we see. And we see the fire and black smoke he’s created–the black fire of his evil, smoldering around him. He earned that, too. We see the products of his own sense of self, surrounding him.

He’s no longer some blank, person-less copy. He’s his own animal. An individual. One of a kind.

#Twin Peaks #Twin Peaks: The Return #The Doppelganger #Dale Cooper

Laura whispers to Dale, together in The Red Room. She tells him her secrets. In many ways, that’s how their story together began--it’s one of the first things that happens when they meet in his dream. And it happens again--(it is happening again)--after twenty-five years, in The Return.

It’s the last view we have of them, together, in the final credits sequence, as Badalamenti’s gentle music plays over the image.

And we all wanted to know what she really said.

But like most things with Lynch, that linear course of thinking isn’t really profitable. If you look at that, and want to know what she’s saying, you’ll never know. We’re not given access. If that’s how you try to get meaning out of this final moment, it’ll forever evade you.

I think it’s the image itself, where the meaning lies. Laura comes to Dale. She kisses him--bonds with him. They’re connected. And she opens up to him. Tells him her secrets. That relationship is the point. She speaks, and he hears. That’s the endless cycle of Twin Peaks. Our two protagonists forever speaking and listening, together. A storyteller and her audience, creating something in an endless moment.

It isn’t what she says that matters. It’s that she’s saying it at all. That she’s saying it to Dale, and always will be.

#What she says is between them #We aren't invited #Twin Peaks #Dale Cooper #Laura Palmer #Twin Peaks: The Return

So I just watched El Camino, and I was struck by Mike and Walt’s scenes with Jesse. Both men take a paternal sort of interest in Jesse’s future--but their demeanor and intent is so different, as they do it.

Mike resists giving advice at all, at first--tells Jesse he isn’t him, and can’t know what he should do. Then he shares his honest opinion when he’s asked. And it’s not the most practical of advice. It’s more of a dream, really. Go to Alaska. The last frontier.

You picture clean snow and a horizon full of possiblity. It’s not a plan--more a distant hope for what Alaska represents. It’s a desire of the heart.

Walt, though... his advice comes completely unsolicited. And it’s concrete--mundane and practical. Go to college. Make something of yourself. Then he ignores Jesse’s thoughts about sports medicine and tells him business is the place for him. Something he sees as a channel into greater things. To making a mark. Because that’s what Walt wants and always wanted--to be perceived as important. To do something “really special.” Jesse is unimpressed.

None of this is special to him.

So you can see why one set of advice lands and the other doesn’t. Jesse doesn’t want to be seen and appreciated and known for what he’s done. It’s nothing he could ever be proud of. He tells Mike he wants to make it right--even though Mike knows that’s something he can never do. He cares about the destructive effects of his choices, and nothing for how people see and know and fear him.

So instead of righting wrongs, Jesse disappears. Unlike some Ozymandias--carving his works into stone--he erases his own name. Takes on a new one--unknown to everyone--and vanishes into the snow and trees.

#El Camino #Breaking Bad #Jesse Pinkman #Walter White #Mike Ehrmantraut #El Camino spoilers #Breaking Bad spoilers #spoilers

chamblerstara asked:

Happy birthday! I hope you're doing well and that you have an amazing day!

You remembered!!! Thank you, lovely Molly <3

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