Mother Nature knew exactly what she was doing when she made berries

enough tedtalk….. it’s time to tedlisten………

parades at disney: here’s a 40 foot tall mechanical dragon that actually breaths fire

parades at universal: y’all remember Hop(2011)?

Ight but you can openly drink and there are kiosks full of alcohol at Universal So Take ya pick

have fun dehydrating at the amusement park, you stupid shit

Disney has more accidents recorded than any other amusment park franchise ever :/

Meanwhile Universal has had only about 21 major incidents

Wow. The company that has had parks open for over 60 years on four different countries has had more recorded accidents than the company with three parks that have been open since the 90s.

amusement part discourse 

id like to state for the record i didnt remember hop (2011) at all before this post

this post has everything… parade ratings… disagreements about day trip nourishment… flawed statistical analysis… hop (2011)…

the floor is life without depression

girlfriend: *tries to boop my nose*

me, knowing if she does so the top of my head will pop open to reveal a gamecube disc reader: haha babe stoooooop

Alexa release the serotonin

im gay

gratefully accepting your donations to me via paypal

In my defense, your honor, I really am the dumbest bitch alive

Quick question is anything real

me to my alarm in the morning: I was literally sleeping but go off I guess

Bottoms need to stop fighting over tops and make them actually work for it so that they don’t go around thinking their entire job is to stick their dicks in and put zero effort because they’re “in demand.” Bottom solidarity.

when tumblr user sodomymcscurvylegs rises up against the Capitop and ignites the revolution as our Bottomingjay

Me on my way to destroy the TOParchy and liberate my fellow bottoms from oppression:

Is that Mariah?

No, it’s me going to liberate my fellow bottoms from this TOPtalitarian regime.

mood: the mexican dude who told judge judy “this is your show but this is my episode”

me at god

customers wanna be right soooo bad. like damn go clock in since u know so much

WHO MADE HIM FEEL LIKE THIS?!?