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@squidsun / squidsun.tumblr.com

what up im bri
26-bi-she/her
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modismod

So kh fans what’s the lore behind utada hikaru being able to dual wield two keyblades? Who had to seek refuge inside utada’s heart?

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zaelic-deity

Tell me you didn't find refuge in her heart the first time you heard Simple and Clean.

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reblogged

Bah okay this is. This is like not my best work because it's literally a vent fic and those are never anyone's best work but idk I wrote it all in one sitting it was kinda wack and it actually sort of made me feel better so you know what wtf I'll post it here

Trigger warnings: Negative self-talk, depression, and disordered eating (not an eating disorder, just disordered eating that's not intentional). For as awful as a headspace I was in when I wrote this it's actually not really that dark

Summary:

Kocho pauses for a moment more before she continues, “I know you like to keep to yourself. But this,” she gestures to him; Giyuu winces. “This isn’t what I would call ‘keeping to yourself.’ This is what I would call isolating yourself to such an extent that you don’t even know what day it is.” Her voice is uncharacteristically gentle when she speaks her next words. “This is a problem, Tomioka.” All he can do is choke out another apology. “I’m sorry.”
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reblogged

Ah yes, 3 of my favourite types of characters:

No thoughts, head empty

pathetic wet rag of a man

malewife

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LETTERS TO SANEMI

This can be read as a standalone, but if you'd like you can read my previous thoughts on Genya's literacy.

dear aNiki,

kocho gave me a Notebook today aNd told me to write down any after efects or experiNces after eating a demoN iN here but said I should also keep a jourNal to show you oNe day. she gave one to tokito to for his memory loss I thiNk.

she started teachng me how to write receNtly. she said if I caN’t become a hashira or talk to you by the time i've fiNished learNiNg, i can come up with a good apologi letter for you.

himejima-saN is very proud that I'm learNiNg how to write. he was sad he couldn't teach me Himself but Now I can help Him deliver messages he caN't write or Read.

i caN't do aNy breathiNg techNiques, but himjima-saN’s traiNing is iNteNse eNough that i can slay demons eveN without eating them sometimes. maybe i will be able to become the first hashira without a techNique.

Im Not sure yet Of what to write iN here, so thats all for Now. I hope you like the ohagi I seNt you. kocho said she'd pass it for Me.

***

Dear Aniki,

I'm very embarrassed to say this, but when I showed Kocho my writing it turned out I got a lot of things wrong. She was very nice about it when she saw how red I was but couldn't teach me today so the Butterfly Girls had to do it. I think they were too scared to laugh but it's embarrassing anyway to have them know more about writing than I do.

For one apparently I got all my captal (is that how you spell it?) letters wrong. Small letter n and captal letter N are also very different and it's confusing. And I'm glad Himejima-san won't find out I didn't write his name correctly.

The demon I ate the other day left me with a very weirdly shaped hand that hasn't gone away yet, so I'll stop writing for now since it's tiring to hold a pencil with talons. Kocho offered to cut my nails for me but I said no because she was going to use her katana.

***

Dear Aniki,

It really hurt me to find out you threw away my apology letter. I really want to apologize for that night but you keep pushing me away. Are you disappointed in me for joining the Corps or because I can't use breathing techniques? I promise I'll do better.

At least you didn't reject my ohagi. I found out because Tokito was eating it when I met him today. The Mist Pillar is really weird. I didn't know his amnesia was so bad to this state he wandered into the room I was staying in at the Butterfly Mansion thinking it was his. I found him standing by the window holding my gun without moving for about ten minutes. I thought he was a girl for a second so it kind of stunned me into silence. He didn't even notice I was there until I yelled at him to put it down.

It was really awkward at first because I had to explain to him it wasn't his room and he had to explain to me he wasn't a girl, then there was an awkward pause where we just stared at each other. He called me a rooster too…which is still confusing.

I find it really hard to believe he's fourteen and already a Pillar. Jealous, really, because he gets to see you and I don't. Although he called you a wolf and I'm not sure what that means when I asked him where he got the ohagi from and he said the “old white wolf looking Hashira…I forgot. I think I bought it…wait, but I didn't bring any money.”

Somehow I ended up agreeing to his demand of training with him first thing tomorrow to show him how to use a gun. Thankfully the side effects of the demon I ate is gone now.

Kocho told me he'll probably forget about it though.

***

Dear Aniki,

Today's my birthday. Do you miss me as much I do for you? I wish I can still celebrate it with our siblings and mom, or at least with you.

Kinzaki and the Butterfly Girls made me a cake. Kocho gave me a new yukata after I ripped my old one from my last fight. Her tsugoku gave me a coin for whatever reason. But I got really shy and didn't say much.

Muichiro forgot it was my birthday and thought it was Kocho’s, so he gave me her present. He thought it was funny to pin the butterfly to my hair. The girls started giggling at me so I chased him around the Butterfly Mansion.

Himejima-san gave me a cat. She's very cute. I named her Shizu, after mom. She followed me everywhere and even peed on Muichiro’s foot. He said she was stupid but later on I found him carrying her around.

Her white fur made me think of you. If you ever forgive me one day I'm sure you'll love her too. She likes the smell of ohagi too apparently.

***

Dear Aniki,

Rengoku-san the Flame Pillar and Kanroji the Love Pillar came to visit Himejima-san today. Rengoku-san gave me ohagi, so I thanked him but he said it wasn't from him. I'm praying this means you don't completely hate me.

Muichiro came over to Himejima-san’s estate today too by mistake, but he decided to stay and train with me anyway. He asked to see Shizu and that's when I realized she was missing.

How hard could it be to find a snowy white cat? That's what we thought until we (me mostly, Muichiro kept forgetting where he had looked) hunted everywhere for her. Then Rengoku-san said he saw her run pass him and when we looked she jumped off a tree and took off.

I still can't stop turning red whenever I think about how I slammed into Kanroji chasing Shizu, so I immediately ran off with Muichiro. I hope if I meet her again she'll have forgotten about it.

Dumb cat.

***

Dear Aniki,

Today that Kamado kid - the one who broke my arm back at Final Selection after I grabbed the Ubuyashiki girl; hope she doesn't hold it against me - picked up the stack of letters I accidentally dropped. You know it's the anniversary of everyone's death today, so I was planning on taking the letters I've been writing to them to burn. Usually I would just leave flowers and prayers at the shrine Himejima-san helped me make because we never got to bury them, but since Kocho taught me to write I decided to make a new tradition.

Anyway I knew he didn't mean to read them but I got mad anyway until he told me his family died the same way and he was happy that I was still honoring their memory of whatever. I wish me and you were like him and his sister. I wonder what would've happened if we had stayed together? I never meant to hurt you like that.

I don't remember writing any of this. Did I change my handwriting or something? Who's Aniki?

I've just chased away Muichiro. I can't believe he got our notebooks mixed up and started reading mine. I hope he didn't read anything…too personal. Foggy brained idiot just stared at me and left.

He came back later. He didn't apologize but handed me a watermelon. He's forgiven…I guess? I don't even want to know he got it from, especially when I can hear Kinzaki and that pig head boy shouting.

***

Dear Aniki,

Today's the day before the final battle and I don't have much time to write as much as I want to, so I'll make this entry quick.

Muichiro has become a much nicer person, and I've had a lot of fun with him over time. I'm gonna miss training with him and talking and cloud gazing together afterwards. I hope we both don't die. He called me his best friend the other day and although I got really flustered I don't want it to be the last time.

Kocho and the Butterfly Girls celebrated my “graduation” of learning how to write the other day. Maybe one day you'll be able to come and celebrate some other occasion with us.

I will never be able to repay everything Himejima-san has done for me. I owe him for the slayer I am today. I hope the wooden bracelet I carved will be able to convey it. I can write now but I'm no good with words.

I'm really grateful to Kamado and his sister for reminding me during the battle at the Swordsmith Village why I joined the Corps. I'm going to prove myself to you and apologize for once and for all. I don't know what I'm going to do if you keep pushing me away even after all this. I miss you a lot.

I swear we'll be brothers again after this battle.

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