trans messiah

if you’re american and coming to australia, I’m gonna go ahead and say that you should be 100 percent way more worried about being king hit by a dude named “dane” in a bintang singlet than any fucking spiders that exist here

what does this say in english

“Good sir, if you are a resident of the United States of America and coming to visit the sunny land of Australia, allow me to inform you that you should be rather more concerned about being sucker punched by a gentleman named ‘Dane’ who is likely to be seen wearing a wifebeater with a beer company logo on it than by any of the dangerous spiders that exist on this lovely continent”.

ok so what does it say in american

“You’re more likely to get sucker punched/cold-cocked by an asshole than you are to be bitten by a spider”.

thank you

Well rattle my spoons, that don’t make a lick of sense. Wot in tarnation does this hootenanny say?

“If ya mosey on by Australia, you best be fixin’ to get to some fisticuffs more'n checkin fer spiders.”

This is a Rosetta Stone for a single language

Story time

A friend of a friend has the superpower of making people realize their trans. Pretty much anyone he's come in contact with has later realized they're trans.

This power is so pronounced that he got into a car accident and a few weeks later the person in the other car came out as trans.

Power of trans your gender

Not a major car accident, just a little gender bender

I can't believe straight people think butch lesbians are scary. I see a butch lesbian and I'm immediately like I would trust you with my life

reblog to get the person you reblogged this from ABORTED

An Electric Toaster circa 1920

gay thoughts

Old dude came in the shop and when I said "lemme know if you have any questions" he goes "what was the name of Alexander the Great's horse," thinking he was so funny. I told him Bucephalus, and he was so disappointed. Like his whole day was hanging on beating me at trivia. He says "you're only the second person who knew that" and I said "well, probably the third if you count Alexander the Great." He left without buying anything, and did not say goodbye. I think I honestly hurt his weird little feelings! Sorry I'm a bitch, old man!

If you can’t reblog this, unfollow me now.

it’s fucking disgusting that i just lost 6 followers

GET OUT YOU MCNASTIES

Baby Clifford & baby Snoopy

I love u tumblr crop