SHE'S NO YOU - CH 16
It’s been too long… over a month nearly 2 months since I put out chapter 15, and I’m so disappointed. I’m royally annoyed that finally when I’m able to get back into Tumblr, my lovely daughter decided it was fine to spill some stuff on my computer… I lost so much work :( so I have literally had to re-write everything you see from Now on and it all be on my phone for now.
I’ve had to shorten the chapters because this Tumblr app on my phone is shocking lol
This is unedited because I’m too exhausted to re-read this, I’m just happy I’m finally posting this! I love all you patient people and I’ll be writing the next chapter tonight so give me a few days :)
CHAPTER FIFTEEN - HONESTLY
“Linda-” it didn’t matter how many times I repeated that women’s name, when she goes off in one of her many tangents there was no way you could get through to her. “-jesus mom, stop thinking and just sit down for a moment. Your fussing isn’t helping the situation.” I rubbed my temples, trying to ease the sudden onset of a headache.
“Seriously Rachel for once stop trying to be so damn independent all the time and let me help you. You got out of hospital yesterday, tomorrow is ruby’s birthday and here you are on the sofa trying to organise a party and not in bed!” She huffed, her fists resting on her chubby hips as she stood before me. “Do you need another pillow? Here let me get you one-.”
“Mom! I’m fine please… I’ve been in a bed for months, I need to get some normality back into my life and if that means organising a party in a day, then so be it.”
I was exhausted beyond belief but I needed to get back into the real world. It didn’t help that my mom had practically moved in with me, well she hasn’t left yet let’s put it that way. Don’t get me wrong, I love my mom but the best way to deal with her was in small doses. Not extended overnight stays.
“Fine, I give up! But don’t come crying to me when you start complaining about being sore, I’ll only say I told you so.”
“I’ll be fine” I stressed. “Finn will be here soon…”
My mother’s movements stoped. I could feel her eyes move across me as I tried to busy myself with the many phone numbers scattered over the coffee table. The distraction wasn’t working, it was obvious I wasn’t getting away from this one.
I sighed. “Just say it mom, whatever has your mind working so hard must be important."
"What’s going on with you and Finn?”
I knew this question was going to come up in conversation soon, but honestly I still hadn’t prepared an answer.
“I don’t know” I shrugged, “we haven’t put a label on anything but I’m not sure if I’m ready for that type of commitment yet. It still hurts, all the words he said to belittle me when we were apart are still wirling around in my head.”
“Hon, that man loves you more then anything. Rachel baby, you didn’t see him when you were in hospital… He was there by your side everyday holding your hand, and if he wasn’t doing that he was being a single dad.”
“I know…” I had already been informed by Robert of the stress and exhaustion that plagued Finn everyday. Not once did he complain or speak about how he was feeling, and still to this day he hadn’t opened up to me about what had happened over the last few months. He wanted the here and now, a sort of new beginning with a twisted past.
I guess that’s what scares me. I’m not sure if I can go back to who I was before, I changed when my marriage ended. I had to learn how to become independent and parent a different way, no more relying on people. Heck, I can’t remember if I even asked Greg for his help.
Memories don’t fade fast; good or bad. So much nastiness had been spoken between us, and I’ll admit I’m scared. Getting back to a place that I left behind years ago, frightens the shit out of me.
“Well you know exactly what you have to do. No more excuses, you know deep down that everything he said during that time was blinded by rage, he couldn’t have you and that hurt him. You hurt each other, and to build that back is going to take work but I know you’ll get there.”
I wiped the tear from my face and smiled at my mother. She always knew what to say when I had to face something i didn’t want to. She is my number one supporter in life, and for that I’ll forever be in her debt.
“Thank you mom” I smiled. Of course she took the opportunity to smother me in a motherly hug, before she realised she was hurting me of course. “Shit! I’m sorry.”
I leaned back and tried to not show her how much pain I was truly in. “Its fine mom, it’s just still a little tender.”
She patted my check without saying another word, then left to finish her duties in the kitchen whilst I continued to plan my princess her birthday party.
I snuggled into the comfort of my bed, my body exhausted by the sheer volume of work I put into tomorrow and the party. Even if I managed to do it from the lounge room sofa, it still exerted my energy.
The kids hopeful were asleep, thanks to their father. Who like last night made sure they were clean and tucked away in their beds. He had been incredible since arriving home, and hasn’t allowed me to lift a finger. I can’t really complain about not having to do housework now am I?
The door cracked open and in walked the person in question. His suite jacket long forgotten, along with his tie. It was a sight I had seen often, but still got aroused by. His muscle more noticeable under the expensive cotton, even as he turned to shut the door behind him my eyes still found their way to his impressive behind.
“The kids are asleep” he spoke softly as he moved towards my side of the bed. He perched himself on the side of the bed and grabbed my hand. His thumb drawing a pattern on my palm, no words were spoken for a moment.
His head jerked upwards and he stared into my eyes a little confused.
“For all of this with the kids. Your going out of your way to be here and do everything when you don’t need too.”
Finn shook his head, “Rae they are my kids too, and you need me. I’m more then happy to lay my jacket across a puddle so you don’t get wet.”
He smiled, and captured my lips in a barely there kiss. “Id do anything for you, remember that.”
“What are we?” I burted out before I had the choice to second guess myself. Logical question, poor timing.
“What do you mean what are we? Aren’t we back together?”
“I don’t know you haven’t exactly said we are back together or not, you know” I huffed a little, causing his smile to grow.
“I just assumed since the ‘i love you’ was swapped at the hospital it meant you were officially mine again.”
“Well you could of told me that.”
He leaned forward and kissed my pouting lips again and chuckled.
“Did you want me to ask you officially?” Finn raised and eye brow, “get down on my knees and beg you to be my girlfriend again?”
“Or did you want me to get down on one knee and beg you to be wife again?”
Only a few hours ago I was worried about putting a label on us, and now he was talking marriage. It was too soon, I had only adjusted to letting him back in. I wasn’t ready for that type of commitment yet.
“Too soon?” He laughed, and my panicked face turned red with embarrassment.
“Yeah I little bit too soon” I smiled up at him.
“I’ll give you time to get use to us again first, but I promise you that I’m going to make you my wife sooner or later. Whenever your ready so am I, I’ve missed you Mrs. Nelson.”
I moved the blankets next to me and patted the empty space. He was quick the strip out of his work attire, only leaving his boxers on. Finn slid his warm body up against mine, being careful of my still healing injuries.
“The next few months things are going to change” he whispered in my ear, “at work, between us. And it’s all going to be for the better. I’m not going to let them get away with this, I’ve waited long enough.”
I knew exactly what he was talking about. I leaned towards his warmth more, our bodies were flush, the skin on my body tingled.
“You do what you have to do.” I knew there was no stopping a man like Finn. He was ruthless when it came to it, a business man of his stature didn’t get to the top playing nice.
“I love you” he whispered just as my eyes fluttered shut.
I don’t believe I managed to say the words back before I fell asleep, but he knew I loved him more then anything.
I hope I got all the tags!
