Whenever I’m bored I just listen to sad music and think of old memories

i can smell depression 

Ding Ding

 we’re just living in a web of lies now aren’t we

this was physically difficult to read

hooray for the ladies

who are using their fame

to get shit done

(not intended to be a complete list)

Hey, it’s uh… It’s me. I know that I’ve been gone too long and, uh… It’s– I just, I want you to know that it’s not about you and it’s not about our fight. Okay? Something came up and I will explain it all when I see you. I just… I want you to know that I’m not mad. I’m just sorry. About everything. I don’t want you to get hurt at all. And I don’t wanna lose you. Just make sure you heat up some real food, okay? Not just Eggos. And I want you to eat all the peas, even if they’re mushy and gross. And… I will be home soon.

Drake Help Me Through This

mondays more like

Set your WIFI password to 2444666668888888, when your friend ask just tell him it’s 12345678

i sat here for like 10 minutes trying to figure this out.

HERE, HAVE A JOKE IN SPANISH:

“-sabe inglés?

-si

-como se dice ”un zapato” en inglés?

-a shoe

-salud

-gracias”

I’m never making another text post again

honestly fuck viruses they’re not even alive they’re just strands of punk ass DNA that go around fucking up us normal and god fearing life forms you don’t even have a nucleus you stupid bacteriophage looking horizontally transmitting RNA clump

Some dude: Hey bro you got the time?

Me: Yeah it’s fuckinuuuuuh [pulls a cat out of the inside of my jacket and looks it dead in the eyes] about 6pm