Pancakes for Two

AVATAR: The Last Airbender fan art by ROY THE ART

I NEED THEM ALL SO BADLY 

(via)

I uhh redrew Zuko as the girl laying by the pool meme, someone help me find a funny caption

               Come and deliver us too.

It’s been like three thousand years and they still haven’t figured it out.

characters from something I’ve been brewing

the idea of getting banned from twitter for saying mean things is so unbelievably foreign to me . every time this site updates people tag staff and say shit like “gargle my dick and balls” whereas on twitter if you insinuate that maybe you’re not the greatest fan of Papa John’s and would like to stop seeing their ads twitter kicks your account into the void for a week

Somebody got banned for impersonating Elon Musk

Identity theft is a serious thing, indeed, but these were the tweets

im thinking about them (honey bear bottles)

Some girls, Kelly Beeman

you have to unlearn social cues to be a lush employee

Lush employee once asked if i wanted to sample some soap. I said sure, thinking id smell it or she’d let me wash my hands with it or something. She takes me by the arm and leads me to a sink. And fucking washes my entire arm. Up to the shoulder. I short circuited from how bold and intimate that was. It was my first time in a Lush, as i was an edgy mall rat in my teens so they wouldn’t let me in growing up. I had no idea of the intricate rituals that take place there.

buttered bread really is the epitome of goodness & purity

This video made me really happy

Man: Hey French guy, how do you say yes? Oui. How do you say no? Non. How do you say maybe?

[Said with strong Southern accent]: Puh-tater.

This post has killed me.

My favorite thing is that Europe is spooky because it’s old and America is spooky because it’s big

“The difference between America and England is that Americans think 100 years is a long time, while the English think 100 miles is a long way.” –Earle Hitchner

A fave of mine was always the american tales where people freaked out because ‘someone died in this house’ and all the europeans would go ‘…Yes? That would be pretty much every house over 40 years old.’

‘…My school is older than your entire town.’

‘Sorry, you think *how far* is okay to travel for a shopping trip?’

*American looks up at the beams in a country pub* ‘Uh, this place has woodworm, isn’t that a bit unsafe?’ ‘Eh, the woodworm’s 400 years old, it’s holding those beams together.’

A few years ago when I was in college I did a summer program at Cambridge aimed specifically at Americans and Canadians, and my year it was all Americans and one Australian.  We ended the program with a week in Wessex, and on the last day as we all piled onto the bus in Salisbury (or Bath? I can’t remember), the professors went to the front to warn us that we wouldn’t be making any stops unless absolutely necessary.  We’re headed to Heathrow to drop off anyone flying off the same day, then back to Cambridge.

“All right, it’s going to be a long bus ride, so make sure you’re prepared for that.”

We all brace ourselves.  A long bus ride?  How long?  We’re Americans; a long bus ride for us is a minimum of six hours with the double digits perfectly plausible.  We can handle a twelve hour bus ride as long as we get a bathroom break.

The answer.  “Two hours.”

Oh.

English people trying to travel around Australia and wildly underestimating distance are my favourite thing

a tour guide in France told my school group that a particular cathedral wouldn’t interest us much because “it’s not very old; only from the early 1600s”

to which we had to respond that it was still older than the oldest surviving European-style buildings in our country

China is both old and big. I had some Chinese colleagues over; we were discussing whether they wanted to see the Vasa ship (hugely expensive war ship which sank on it’s maiden voyage after 12 min). They asked if it was old, I said “not THAT old” (bearing in mind they were Chinese) “it’s from the 1500s.” To my surprise they still looked impressed, nodding enthusiatically. Then I realised I’d forgotten something: “…I mean it’s from the 1500s AFTER the birth of Christ” and they went “oh, AFTER…”.

My dad’s favorite quote from various tours in Italy was “Pay no attention to the tower – it was a [scornful tone] tenth century addition.”

My last boss was Chinese, and she said when her parents came to visit her from Beijing they pronounced Chicago “A very nice village.” 

This post keeps getting better