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fireproof

@smolkittenlouis-blog / smolkittenlouis-blog.tumblr.com

salad in the wind
i draw and make edits. check 'em out.
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bethaboolou
Anonymous asked:

But It wasnt an anon who submited. The person is a larriie and says they spent 100dollars on it.

Well then they got fucking cheated. You get a legit paper copy WITH A SEAL.

Also it’s never 100 bucks. My marriage certificate copies were like 15 I think.

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I called mattmike.

Me: Hello? Mattmike?
Mattmike: Yes, hello!
Me: Hi. So I have some questions.
Mattmike: Shoot.
Me: About how much have you spent on bear and bear accessories in the last 12 months?
Mattmike: Somewhere in the neighborhood of $5,000.
Me: K. And plane tickets to events that were not shows you worked on? Assuming you weren't contracted to work at every event One Direction put on in the last 12 months.
Mattmike: Probably another $5,000-$7,000.
Me: Ok. So you've spent in the neighborhood of $10,000 or more to both simultaneously mock Larries and educate them about LBGTQ+ culture in the UK?
Mattmike: I like to mock and educate. It's education through mockery.
Me: Interesting technique. Ok, and again, you're just a crew member who somehow managed to fly around the world at the drop of a hat to prove a point to people who found this a fun experience?
Mattmike: Correct!
Me: And when you deactivated the Twitter, rather than actually prove the point by revealing you are indeed behind the bears, you simply deactivated leaving everyone to believe what they already believed?
Mattmike: Yes.
Me: Stunning. I guess that's it then. No further questions. This all seems perfectly logical.
Mattmike: I'm glad. Goodbye, my child. WESTSIDE!!!
Me: Wait, a goddamn-
Mattmike: [click]
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