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Well someone displeased the sky gods didn’t they

My first thought was someone pleased the sky gods, because this is a SHOW. 

That’s the problem with gods; their pleasure and their wrath often look the same.

why is this fire quote from a tumblr post

Because tumblr is the real world equivalent of infinite monkeys using typewriters eventually producing Shakespeare.

World Heritage Post

It's okay if it takes a little longer than you thought.

Ok now that the boops are gone and i can be grumpy again

"yeah the boops are fun but don't let them distract you from--" PLEASE let them distract you. Please take one goddamn day off from thinking about the world's problems. And if you can't figure out how to do that, for the love of god don't insist that everyone else be stuck in "I'm not allowed to be happy about anything ever" hell with you

If you insist that everyone be focusing on "the problems" at all times that is at best performative and at worst actively harmful to the cause you're trying to support. Taking real action uses up energy, often times a LOT of it. Insisting that no one ever takes a break means insisting that no one ever take time to rest and begin to gather more energy for another actual action. Being "on" all the time isn't your duty, it's an impossibility.

Take a fucking break. And remind everyone that they need to take breaks too.

one of the best academic paper titles

for those who don't speak academia: "according to our MRI machine, dead fish can recognise human emotions. this suggests we probably should look at the results of our MRI machine a bit more carefully"

I hope everyone realises how incredibly important this dead fish study is. This was SO fucking important.

I still don’t understand

So basically, in the psych and social science fields, researchers would (I don't know if they still do this, I've been out of science for awhile) sling around MRIs like microbiolosts sling around metagenomic analyses. MRIs can measure a lot but people would use them to measure 'activity' in the brain which is like... it's basically the machine doing a fuckload of statistics on brain images of your blood vessels while you do or think about stuff. So you throw a dude in the machine and take a scan, then give him a piece of chocolate cake and throw him back in and the pleasure centres light up. Bam! Eating chocolate makes you happy, proven with MRI! Simple!

These tests get used for all kinds of stuff, and they get used by a lot of people who don't actually know what they're doing, how to interpret the data, or whether there's any real link between what they're measuring and what they're claiming. It's why you see shit going around like "men think of women as objects because when they look at a woman, the same part of their brain is active as when they look at a tool!" and "if you play Mozart for your baby for twenty minutes then their imagination improves, we imaged the brain to prove it!" and "we found where God is in the brain! Christians have more brain activity in this region than atheists!"

There are numerous problems with this kind of science, but the most pressing issue is the validity of the scans themselves. As I said, there's a fair bit of stats to turn an MRI image into 'brain activity', and then you do even more stats on that to get your results. Bennett et. al.'s work ran one of these sorts of experiments, with one difference -- they used a dead salmon instead of living human subjects. And they got positive results. The same sort of experiment, the same methodology, the same results that people were bandying about as positive results. According to the methodology in common use, dead salmon can distinguish human facial expressions. Meaning one of two things:

I cannot overstate just how many papers were completely fucking destroyed by this experiment. Entire careers of particularly lazy scientists were built on these sorts of experiments. A decent chunk of modern experimental neuropsychology was resting on it. Which shows that science is like everything else -- the best advances are motivated by spite.

Being on Tumblr from ten years ago until now and seeing how it's aged is so funny. When I first got here everything was like "haha lol so random, superwholock, taquitos, tumblr university!" but today I just scrolled past three different memes about tax season

no one can make twilight double-guess his looks besides anya

My wife: Are you making a list of fonts?

Me: No, worse. I'm replicating the titles of video games but it's the fonts that they're in

My wife: What does that mean

Me: This

some more for you

It was kind of interesting to me that out of all the people in our training group, the ones that were the quickest to form social bonds were the people from way out in the country and the city people just kind of quietly kept to themselves.

But I was definitely accepted as one of the bumpkins.

Oh! This is actually an example of Rural vs Urban manners.

In rural/less densely populated areas, the polite thing is to offer people your time and social energy which is why country people will talk your ear off at the slightest acquaintence- it’s kind of lonely when you have to make an effort to see people, so you Make An Effort ™

In Urban/Densely populated areas, you’re meeting people whether you want to or not, because you are physically close to each other constantly. So the Polite Thing there is to kind of ignore other people and keep strictly to business, so you’re not imposing upon thier (probably already drained) soical spoons.

The city folks will warm right up to you once they get to know you well enough to know that talking to you won’t piss you off.

I grew up rural and live in the SF Bay Area now, and this is exactly how it is.

Appropriate city behavior is about *efficiency*, creating the least friction possible in every interaction because everyone has somewhere to be and is trying to pretend they don’t have strangers in their personal bubble *all day long*.

In SF, chatting with the bank teller a second longer than necessary is rude AF because there are 10 people in line and the teller is running behind and you are inconviencing *everyone*. They will deal with 1000 customers today and they genuinely don’t have it in them to form a friendly relationship with you.

In the little forest where I grew up you could stop your car in the middle of a one lane street to chat up a friend on the sidewalk. Any other cars would just go around you. There wasn’t much traffic, it was fine. If you’re one of 50 people the bank teller is gonna see today and there’s no line, it’s actually nice to ask how their day has been and commiserate about the roadwork at the single downtown traffic light.

City & country folks are operating under very different pressures and both are “right”, but it can be hard for city people to remember how to just…shoot the shit with strangers.

the thing about modern suburbia is that it is the worst of both worlds in this regard

i think this is probably true of every office, but there's a middle aged woman working in business who doesn't hold any particular place in the chain of command but is Sovereign. i was running support and she has access to more secure network drives than i do. im pretty sure she has an admin account. i was having trouble with my parking pass and my boss just said to talk to kristen- one day later i had parking in any garage on campus. she's not even in charge of parking in our building

This is also true of academia. In pretty much any department of the university — in my experience at least — there’s a person with a small-but-private office and an unassuming title (probably including a word like “secretary” or “assistant”), usually an older woman, and she actually runs the place. Faculty defer to her; department heads come and go, but Jill has been there for thirty years and knows how everything works, and she’s the person you go to if you want to get anything done. You’ll know her because when a professor directs you to her they won’t say “you need to talk to the Office of So-and-So because this falls under their purview”, but “you need to talk to Jill.” Her official job title is basically irrelevant because her actual role is acting as eminence grise for this whole operation.

I’ve personally had the experience where my advisor told me “you should do such-and-such certification, go talk to Jill,” and I went to talk to Jill & she said “actually you can’t do such-and-such because XYZ,” so I went back to my advisor to relay this, and he just kind of shrugged and was like, “well if Jill says no, then it can’t be done” and that was the end of it. Complete veto power, no higher authority to turn to, because the only reason Jill can’t do something is if it’s literally impossible.

Honestly there’s probably a whole dissertation about invisible labor and gender dynamics in there waiting to be written.

The one in my undergrad department was Linda C, and I think her hypercompetence must have risen to the point of allowing her to manipulate time itself, because in my experience, every time you needed to talk to Ms. C, you would end up chatting with her for at least an hour (which was both enjoyable and informative) and yet she got so much work done--it just didn't seem physically possible.

Take secretaries and administrative assistants out of any organization and you'll see it crumble in no time. They are the holder of the secrets to understanding red tape and other administrative nightmares.

The whole project of corporate IT was trying to get rid of this type of person and it's why nothing works anymore and we're all dying

Nålhus aka needle houses aka needle keepers made with wool fabric, protected by a ceramic case. Stamped patterns with inspiration from plants and nature in general and the geometrical lines somewhat inspired by runes.

One of these are still in the shop now at nymla.se

This is really pretty! 💜💜💜

And useful! I've made myself several from leg bones of deer and sheep.

People often don't realize that needles used to be really hard to make in the olden days. Imagine having a fragile little piece of bone and having to drill a hole to it! (This is why the oldest bone needles didn't have holes but a little cut on the side to hold the thread and that the 1st holed needles are considered a huge leap in early human technology.)

Needles were vital for survival because that's the thing you need to make and fix your garments! Fine needle work was literally a skill that kept you from dying of exposure to harsh weather, that kept your seams water proof* if done right. It's a precious item you wanted to protect from breaking or getting lost, and having a needle holder like this, which you could hang on your belt, is a genius way to keep your needles safe!

Ancient crafts textile Artisan nerding here, why yes I am. I just really love these and think they're super cool! 💜

*if you're curious and want to read more, I highly highly recommend Betty Kobayashi Issenman's book Sinews of Survival: the Living Legacy of Inuit Clothing.

Reblog becaaause that was a lovely text about needles 😍 So interesting!

So do people realize that we aren't building new train tracks when we expand the amteak network, I have multiple times seen people say that we shouldn't expand the network because it would destroy protected lands, which would be a fair criticism but Amtrak doesn't build new tracks, we use existing tracks. We are not destroying protected lands, we are using land that has already been clear for a century

Also the alternative is more highways which destroy significantly more land for less capacity than railways. So the question is do you want to keep complaining about something that isn't happening and let the environment get damaged as a result or do you want to actually learn how things work

So, wait... Were the tracks not in use at all? Or was it like *only* commercial transport on those tracks? Either way, its good that amtrak will be able to use them again, but one would be much more frustrating

Almost all rail tracks in the US are either abandoned or only used for freight rail at the moment

Jesus, we really have no excuse for having such a lackluster rail system, do we?

Sure we do! The US government hate both rail and you personally

So I go to the dentist and the appointment I had was not the appointment that I thought I was going to have (normal maintenance vs deep clean) so i warned the dentist "hey heads up I burn through dental anesthetics super quick and also I'd like to use as little as possible because putting the dental anesthetics in my body is the most painful part of the process unless I'm having a root canal or something" and she's like "Hmm. Okay. Is it just the injection site?" and I was like "no, it will feel like burning on the opposite side of my face and in my nose and eyes and stuff." And she was like "Hmm. Do you turn really red when this happens?" And I was like "I don't know, I can't really see myself when it happens." And she was like "are you willing to experiment with this a little?" And I was like "sure, no worries" and she injected me with one anesthetic and it hurt like a motherfucker and she and the assistant both went "OOOH" and she was like "Yeah you got really red right away let's try the other," and it was the same thing and then she was like "okay I think this is the one that will work" and it hurt a little bit but it was fucking NOTHING compared to the comprehensive full stabbing burning facial pain from the others and long story short the dentist was like "You're reacting to the epinephrine in these other anesthetics," which I guess is fairly common for people who have autoimmune disorders.

So I guess this is to say: If you get spreading, burning, stabbing pain when you are being injected with local anesthetics it's not supposed to do that and you should say something.

THAT’S-A SPICY LIDOCAINE!!!

Sorry if it’s a little cramped- had to make this all fit in ten photos. Hope you guys like it….. and again…. sorry Andrew

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The window visual did me in I’m wheezing

NO

WELP

I haven’t seen this in years and yet it is burned into my memory forever.

This is on the short list of Eternal Reblog because it’s fucking legendary.

At the gate for my flight home from visiting friends and there's a woman here with a service Shiba Inu. No pics because he has a Do Not Disturb vest and taking pics of strangers is illegal but I need to stress how ON DUTY this animal is. Ears up. Eyes doing Lazer scans of everything. Examining everyone who passes within 10ft like a security guard. Ass planted on her feet. I have never seen a dog with such intense chivalric guardian energy before. He has tiny eyebrows and they are FURROWED with concentration.

Man behind me having unhinged phone conversation. There is an internationally famous dairy in the area I was visiting and he was commissioned by the lady on the other end of the phone to collect specific cheeses from there. The lady is very high strung about the type and condition of the cheese.

The man does not know from cheese. The man "ain't never seen no cheese but orange before" and "I showed ya list to the cheese lady so if it's wrong it's her fault ok?"

I am 80% sure she sent him there for a really specific bleu cheese, 40% sure he does not have the very specific bleu cheese, and 100% sure he's done with her shit.

Our flight is delayed.

He does not have the cheeses in a cooler, just a regular backpack.

I need to emphasize that there is no cooler bag in the backpack. He has Jansport backpack that is jam-packed with cheeses. There is apparently $405 dollars worth of cheeses in that backpack, which I know because he has been trying to get the lady to venmo him the expense, which she has failed to do. It is unclear whether his relation to the lady is romantic, familial or what, but I'm leaning towards "what".

Two more people have joined us. One is a very elegant man with a perfect manicure in a tailored business suit, the other is a neon-haired person of indeterminate gender wearing a fox kirigumi. The Shiba Inu has been staring at the latter for three minutes now.

Uh oh.

Cheese man has been demanding payment because apparently he went like six hours out of his way and paid with his own money and between the cheese and price of gas, he is pretty sure he does not have enough money in his account for an Uber home.

The lady is FLABBERGASTED that he is demanding payment at all, as she was under the impression he was doing this for her out of the goodness of his heart.

He's not having it. He's insisting she told him she would pay him back- he would have gotten her maybe one cheese somewhere closer to his business in the area out of love, but he went out of his way because she agreed to pay him costs+ extra to cover it.

HE RECORDED THE CONVERSATION IN WHICH SHE PROMISED TO PAY FOR THE CHEESE, SHE'S THAT MUCH OF A FLAKE.

I am about to offer this man cash for some of these cheeses because our flight is now more delayed.

"YOU ALWAYS DO THIS! YOU ALWAYS DO THIS AND I FALL FOR IT EVERY TIME! NO! NO! FUCK YOU! IF YOU'RE NOT GONNA PAY ME, YOU DON'T GET FANCY CHEESE."

"OR ELSE WHAT?"

"I'm gonna-? THE BABY SHOWER? MONICA CAN'T EVEN HAVE THIS CHEESE SHE'S PREGNANT!"

"The cheese lady asked if it was for someone because the mushrooms or whatever in the cheese are dangerous for the baby or something?? You wanna poison Monica?"

"WHY WOULD I LIE ABOUT THAT?"

"YEAH OF COURSE I GOT THE CHEESE, THATS WHY I DON'T GOT MONEY FOR UBER!"

"YEAH, GO TELL! GO TELL MOMMA I STOPPED YOUR STUPID ASS FROM KILLING MONICA OR THE BABY! FUCK!"

*hangs up phone*

*head in hands, borderline hyperventilating*

The man in the three piece suit is in the chair next to him. He waits a moment, then reaches into his carryon and pulls out an entire bottle of wine with the TSA pre check sticker on it, and taps cheese guy on the shoulder.

"If your friend doesn't want it, would you be amenable to having it right now?"

Naturally, I have volunteered my box of wheat thins and offered to buy one of the harder cheeses which should be fine if it makes it home.

Meanwhile, Kirigumi has noticed that the Shiba Inu is staring at her and is correctly intimidated.

1. This is some fucking great Camembert. I have compensated cheese guy accordingly. So have like six other people. He's recouped like half his losses.

2. Cheese guy is crying a little about the cash and opening up about his problems. The cheese lady is his younger sister. Suit guy is being very generous with his Pinot Blanc. We are having a picnic/improv family therapy session.

3. This is apparently the latest in a long string of his sister asking for something and then flaking when he asks to be paid back. Started with paying him back only some of what he was owed, then claiming something she paid for him was of equal value when it was not, then recently telling him his memory is wrong and he said it was a gift or that he'd do it for free.

"Yeah, the specific thing of trying to convince you your memory is unreliable is called gaslighting and it's really fucked up." I say

"yeeeeah. The other stuff I forgave because she's never really had a good job so she can't pay me back all the time but at least she was making an effort y'know? But that was. That was over the line."

"If you haven't already, check on the rest of your family's finances. My brother started trying to gaslight everyone when he started stealing from our parents." Says Pinot Blanc.

4. Shiba Inu Lady has purchased a cheddar. Apparently, the dog's name is Donut, and he's her service dog because she's severely visually impaired.

"Oh, he's a guide dog?" Asks cheese guy.

"oh, no." She laughs. "He's too short, and the way my eyes are, it's easier for me to navigate with a cane. No, the problem I have is that some morally impaired people see the cane and think they can get away with stealing my bag or assaulting me because I wouldn't be able to give a description- which is wrong, but rather than deal with that I got Donut, and he helps me by howling at anyone who gets in my personal space and biting anyone who grabs me!"

"Uh." Says Kirigumi. "He's been staring at me do I need to back up or..?"

"Ohdear! No, no- He wasn't looking at you! He loves cheese but he knows he's not supposed to beg so he decided the way to deal with something he wants but can't have is to stare in the other direction."

"OKAY!" Says Kirigumi. "I'm wearing fox pajamas and thought like. He thought I was another dog or something."

"No, no- he doesn't care about dogs, and you get a warning before he goes for the calves. Very helpful, when I was living in Italy!"

"Oh what part? I have family in Tuscany." Says Pinot.

"Does he want a cheese? There is still so much cheese." Says cheese guy.

Plane may be arriving. I am paying for in flight WiFi to keep y'all updated.

1. Cheese guy has sold all but two or three cheeses that he an Pinot are going to eat on the flight.

2. I know they're planning to continue because Pinot talked to the gate agent so he and cheese guy can sit together and talk about family drama and cheese.

3. Pinot has been teaching him about different types of cheese and how to enjoy them.

4. Cheese guy apparently repairs computers and other technology devices for a living and is currently doing the software version of scraping barnacles and other crap off Pinot'macbook.

5. Pinot is now convinced that cheese guy is the smartest and most interesting man in the world.

Ok so the Wifi wasn't working on the plane (also like, nonstop turbulence) and also they got seated in a different row from me, but:

:)

Anyway, it's 2AM, I need to sleep, if you feel like supporting this kind of hard-hitting reporting, I have a Tip Jar!

being a manager sucks balls half the time but the cashier kids im in charge of trust me enough to dick around in front of me so ive been keeping a running list of the shit they say that makes me laugh randomly: -"guys, is it cheating if you play fortnite with your ex" [4 seperate others, immediately]: "YES" -"there must be like… infinite sentences" -"bro what bro what the fuck bro what's that mean bro why'd you say that bro what" <distraught response to a girl randomly greeting him with 'hey there big boy' in an old timey transatlantic news reporter accent

[a ticket reads that a customer wants their burger cut in half]

-"What the hell why are they so picky??? That's like for kids. That's like something my DAD would-- wait i don't have a dad-- that's like something my MOM would do"

-"BRO WHY ARE YOU CUSSING ME OUT IN SPANISH???" for some reason shouted so loudly that customers still in line all start laughing

-i open the restaurant and notice the kitchen is still kind of dirty and try to glean who closed last night, and i overhear two of the boys talking about yesterdaay

me: "so, you helped in the kitchen last night?"

IMMEDIATELY: "IT WASNT ME I JUST DID THE FRYERS LAST NIGHT"

me: "I DIDNT EVEN SAY ANYTHING YET"

i accidentally tripped over a gas line while trying to clean behind the stove and made a loud fear noise and the kid helping me clean the kitchen goes "dude your screams scare me. They remind me of when i accidentally step on my dog's tail"

the Real Adult in charge went to go give someone a break in another store and I'm chilling in ours for a bit and 5 mins one of the girls rushes up to me like "DID YOU KNOW WE HAVE AN ATTIC?"

I did. I have never seen the attic so I go check it out and there's already like three of them up there

me: the fuck are you guys doing???

clerk: they wanna do the grimace challenge up there

one of them has never heard of vampires

update about this one because another coworker wouldnt let it go: he insists he's Heard of them but thought they were, quote, "like, really big bats"

Clerk 1: dude don't mix that isn't it like toxic? What are the chemicals you're not supposed to mix--

me: WHAT'S IN THE SINK.

Clerk 2: We're trying to clean the sink

me: Which cleaners did you MIX

Clerk 3: All of it

me: DRAIN IT.

[one brief emergency explanation about never mixing cleaners and what mustard gas is]

Clerk 1: oh yeah didn't they use that during like world war two

Me: yeah man it's like, a war crime now. It's just such a horrible way to die that we can't use it anymore

Clerk 2: wait fr???

Clerk 3: ohh. What about opium?

Me: ...what?

Clerk 3: like the opium war.

Me:

[one brief emergency explanation about what the opium war was later]

Explained to the two boys helping me in the kitchen why we submerge our lettuce at night to help it keep. They proceed to have a conversation where one is absolutely messing with the other by trying to convince him that both lettuce and reptiles are living things that need to be soaked to survive, and are therefore related. he speaks with so much conviction and just keeps doubling down and the other one just gets increasingly angrier and I'm just trying not to crack up over the fryers

and then the exasperated kid whirls around at me and goes "IS LETTUCE REPTILES???" and I lose my fucking mind

I run this place with one other person who i Do Not Like and the kids are well aware of our stupid restaurant manager beef and love to gossip

They keep moving shit to inconvenient locations and I hate it and keep having to move shit back, then once on my day off they decided to call in help and move my Entire Fucking Kitchen around and I was real fucking pressed about it for like the rest of the week (put off opening the next morning to move all the big ass machines and fryers back my damned self to establish territory or whatever)

A week later one of the really sweet girls who helps me in the kitchen goes "hey I have a confession. me and (other kid) were there while they were moving your kitchen and we knew you'd hate it. I was going to say something"

"Oh no worries, it's not really your responsibility to go between us like that"

"no no, I was going to tell her to at least ask you about it first but then I was like 'hmmm....let's see how this plays out'. for the drama."

"...ok I guess I should probably be mad but that's actually really fucking funny"

today i turned around and saw this