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have mercy on his smol heart suguru o(>< )o

I’ve never seen this breed of dog as a puppy I just kind of assumed they appeared every full moon fully grown and already the size of a horse

In fifth grade a boy tried to impress me by swallowing a whole tadpole live and I punched him so hard that he puked and the tadpole was fine.

I kept it in a terrarium and it became a normal 🐸 despite everything. About a year afterward (I thought) it died, so I sadly put it in a shoebox in the shed until the ground thawed enough for a proper funeral but when that day came I opened the box and the frog was fine.

This is funnier than anything I have ever said.

This post is to Easter what a Geiger counter is to radiation.

I see it’s *looks at smudged writing on hand* Lent again.

details:

father.

“counterspell” or as i like to call it “Nuh uh”

wagging my finger and everything

talk to the mage hand

compliment to the chef (no spoiler in the tag please!)

alright i can get possessed my homie said it was chill

Ling Yao my baby boi 🫠❤️💛

ehe~🎶🚨🚓

i have neither a good imagination nor aphantasia, but a secret third thing

I just imagined a creature that would scare you soooo bad dude

no hope for you even at all