some of my favourite sign fails <3

​i wish this was in my cart and not someone else’s

you can just take it from their cart. its not their possession if they haven't bought it yet

if i were thrift shopping and you put your hands into my cart to take a unique handpicked item i was intending to purchase i would break your legs

PSA: Don't use Open Office

I keep seeing people recommending Open Office as an alternative to Word, and uh... look, it is, technically, an open source alternative to Word. And it can do a lot of what Word can, genuinely! But it is also an abandoned project that hasn't been updated in nine years, and there's an active fork of it which is still receiving updates, and that fork is called LibreOffice, and it's fantastic.

Seriously, if you think that your choices are either "grit your teeth and pay Microsoft for a subscription" or "support free software but have a kind of subpar office suite experience", I guarantee that it's because you're working with outdated information, or outdated software. Most people I know who have used the latest version of LibreOffice prefer it to Word. I even know a handful of people who prefer it to Scrivener.

Open Office was the original project, and so it has the most name recognition, and as far as I can tell, that's really the only reason people are still recommending it. It's kind of like if people were saying "hey, the iPhone 14 isn't your only smart phone option!" but then were only ever recommending the Samsung Galaxy S5 as an alternative. LibreOffice is literally a version of the same exact program as Open Office that's just newer and better – please don't get locked into using a worse tool just because the updated version of the program has a different name!

I use LibreOffice. It's wonderful.

Show up at work like hi boss sorry I'm late my I was helping my mother track down one specific 90s dungeon crawler for the purposes of obtaining a muffin recipe the developer hid in the files

Anyway shoutout to Stonekeep (1995)

This really deserves to be one of those million note posts

whenever i'm trying to talk myself out of buying something i don't need i always hear my old russian professor's voice echoing in my head: "WHAT??? WILL YOU DIE THE RICHEST MAN IN THE GRAVEYARD?" and then i make an unwise financial decision

i'm so glad i happened to see these tags this is the best thing anyone has added to this post so far

elon musk admitted under threat of perjury that this is his burner account

God. no matter how sad and disappointed I feel in myself at least i did not grow up to be this sad and pathetic.

big shoutout to the gas station near my house which is running a deal on energy drinks and thought the best way to express this on their large LED sign was to make it read BANG MONSTER 2/$5

update: you'll be pleased to know that they rethought their sign and have changed it to read MONSTER BANG 2/$5

i have terrible news about the economy

they raised the price of monster bang :(

Monster bang inflation 😵‍💫

to learn more, type 'Monster Bang Inflation' into your work computer

Paying 5 yuan for hot gossip

English added by me :)

Ohio Total Solar Eclipse

For once. We CAN have shit in Ohio 🙏

if I say "I have to Austin Powers my car out of a parking space," do you understand what i mean

like this?

i would've fucked so hard as a court jester in ye olde i would've jangled my balls and done a little dance and sang my silly tunes i'd be so good at my job. alas i have to be on tumblr instead which is like a poor imitation of it

bells. i meant bells

don’t do this to me

still fuckin hate that “bee-free honey” that’s made from……… apples. bitch who you think sexed up those apples

A farmer, by hand and with love and care

wild bees still sexin em up when he’s not looking

old mccuckhold had a farm it seems

The world of modern aesthetics owes so much to Jean Pettine yall dont even know

To clarify, shes the graphic designer of EVERY can and container of AriZona tea

damn she knows how to choose her colors

her website is literally a picture of the arizona green tea bottle and her contact info

from the replies: “second paragraph sums up his strategy. gotta love the brutal honesty of overfunded unicorns adding headcount to show “growth”. man is just gaming the system”

bonus:

hey siri how do i physically hug a fictional character specifically laios touden