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copacetic

@c-ollapsingcities / c-ollapsingcities.tumblr.com

did you cut your hands on me? are my edges sharp?
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Let me talk first. Let me say this. Then you can tell me your decision. I'm not sure how this happened, I'm not one hundred percent I understand how we got here, but I know I had a part to play in it. I know that it is things I have said and things I have done that have made you think and feel this way. And I wish to god that this had happened sooner, so it wouldn't be so painful, or hard, or maybe it'd be more salvageable. But please listen to me when I say this, I do not need you, I just want you. And I want to be whatever you want me to be, that won't hurt me, that could never hurt me. I just want you to be happy, and if you think that is without me then fine, I will leave. But if you just need your space, if I was just being too intense, I can change that. I would've and always will change that. It won't change how I know I feel about you, but I will express that emotion in the way that feels right for you, in the way that makes you comfortable. All I want is for you to be happy, and if there is any chance you want me around to be happy, I will love you in whatever way you need me to. All I wanted was to love you, I was doing it wrong, I was just going off my gut instinct and it's not what you wanted, and I didn't know that until it was too late. But now I know and I want try, try to be the person you want me to be, to give you what need me to give you, no more than that, and no less. I just want to try.

Please let me try.

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I had a dream last night that you said you loved me, that it was a mistake. I didn't think my heart could break anymore than it had until I woke up this morning.

If the worse thing I’ve done to you is love you, then that can’t be so bad, right? I just wish I’d loved you in the right way.

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