imagine being the first amish bitch in your village to like get your body done like ass shots titties done and like beat face contoured… and then you walked into like the saloon or whatever amish people have and everyone dropped their irish fiddles and was shookedt? like everyone churning butter was just in shock and you walked across the artisanal wood floors in your wantmylook.com thigh high lace up heeled boots like your life depended on it… yes god

my mans jedediah looks away in humility but you KNOW he’s churnin butter that night……milkin a different cow…..

Why y'all doing this when you know the Amish are not here to defend themselves.

the Amish can definitely defend themselves they got rakes

this is the best post on this website why do we all keep trying

LOOK WHAT I DID FOR YOU TODAY

*shows up 15 months late with starbucks* anyway here’s my vine compilation

Fuck, Millennials are fucking hilarious

I always feel better about youths after a good vine comp.

t-t-t-t-t-target!!!!!

“Do you speak any Japanese?”

“I’m Chinese I don’t speak any-”

“‘Cause if you do, I’ll sleep with you right now.”

“MITSUBISHI, TOYOTA”

“Bitch cone get me, not only is he ugly but his dishes talk!” “Who you talking to Belle?” “Uh… No one…. bitch that was his plate!”

I have this thing called ‘I consider this person my friend but I don’t know if they consider me theirs’

when youre watching movie with family and theres porn scene

Do you ever eat popcorn out of the palm of your own hand with such ardent desperation that you feel like both a wild horse and the gentle schoolgirl feeding it treats to gain its affection 

this is the funniest thing i have ever read

i knew it from the FIRSTold fashioned we were CURSED 

it hit you like a SHOTGUN SHOT TO THE HEART

isn’t it, 

           isn’t it

isn’t it, 

           isn’t it

isn’t it, 

           isn’t it, 

isn’t it, 

           isn’t it, 

delicate 

—New Year’s Day, Taylor Swift

they say the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree

stumbled across this link today and damn

I didn’t believe these so here are some sources

I LOVE IT ALL I WANT TO READ A MILLION MORE.

Zodiac Signs + Running Away from Love

Why Aries might run away from love: They fear showing their softer side or losing a sense of independence and individuality.

Why Taurus might run away from love: They fear loyalty won’t be return at the same level as their own or fear eventually losing the person.

Why Gemini might run away from love: Fear that the individual won’t truly “get” them or they can’t really become close to them.

Why Cancer might run away from love: Fear of betrayal, fear of vulnerability, or fear of losing them.

Why Leo might run away from love: Fear of ego being unwrapped and exposed or hesitance to sacrifice.

Why Virgo might run away from love: “Too good to be true” syndrome or still doesn’t meet their idea of perfection. Some Virgos can fall into thinking they aren’t good enough for the person.

Why Libra might run away from love: Fear the person isn’t “the one” or fear of uncovering their ugly side.

Why Scorpio might run away from love: Fear of being truly vulnerable or not in control or self-loathing in someway.

Why Sagittarius might run away from love: Partner doesn’t truly trust them, fear of being tied down still exist, and could fear being judged or analyzed by their partner. 

Why Capricorn might run away from love: Fears showing their emotions and desires, doesn’t want to lose control, and fear of unfaithfulness.

Why Aquarius might run away from love: Fear of intimacy, fears or knows they can’t give enough, or fear of loss of autonomy.

Why Pisces might run away from love: Fears that their partner’s love is all lies.

we all kno what he really gon keep up

danny phantom getting ass since 2000

if danny fenton’s crossed eye ass can get a goth girl why cant i?