The Beast that Bothers

How will you age?

Absolute himbo mc

Call that a "brotagonist"

And his adversary, the misogynistic "mantagonist"

I bet octopuses think bones are horrific. I bet all their cosmic horror stories involve rigid-limbs and hinged joints.

To an octopus, a human is like a thinking being with blood-stained coral growing inside it.

I need to sit down and breathe into a bag for a while.

Its parts were obscenely limited in their movement. Each hinge could open or close only a small amount before reaching its limit, yet by working in concert they demonstrated unexpected dexterity, moving and manipulating the objects before it with cunning equal to my own. It was more torso than limb, as though a seal had been stretched and warped, given long grasping tentacles filled with bones like bars of coral.  It’s head was most horrid of all, flat and ovoid, jutting out too small from the trunk as though it belonged to a beast half its size.

The thing rose upon its lowermost appendages, two long trunks that ended in flat, protruding flippers that branched into stubby, grasping mockeries of a sucker. It’s triple-hinged uppermost limbs were similar, but the ends branched into five smaller tentacles, each with three hinges of their own.

I froze, as the thing’s gaze fell upon me and it opened its hideous fish-jaw, filled with thick, many-shaped teeth like white shards of stone, and spoke in a shrill, discordant babble. I felt its horrid dry grip on my flesh, as those hinged appendages closed on me like the legs of a crab.

I felt the heat of its body, tasted its noxious, oily flesh through my touch, and prepared for the end, and all went black as a swoon overtook me.

I awoke, some time later, the cold and comforting water, banished back to the comfort of the sea and the dark. I should be grateful I am alive. I should cast aside the experience like a half-remembered dream.

I shall never again go swimming in search of lights above. The last thing I recall before the darkness took me was my right eye popping free of the thing’s grasp enough to see into the distance for one brief moment.

I saw thousands of lights.

ok so it turns out “horror but it’s about something mundane from the perspective of a non-human animal” fucks severely

I can’t stop laughing at this 🤣😂🤣

Source

Show up. Fight back

Parrying Dagger Italian, ca. 1550–75

big fan of platonic expressions of devotion actually. yeah we're best friends of course i'd find you and hang out with you in every universe.

everyone say thanks to the four bears that gave you autism today

im at a restaurant right now and there's this like 16 year old kid sitting at the table next to me completely alone with like 6 racks of ribs. hes eating like 1 rib every 10 seconds and the poor server who was assigned to him has to keep getting him new ribs. ive been here for an hour just watching this kid inhale ribs like he's gonna die the next day. he probably will given the amount of hot sauce he put on them

i cannot stress enough that this is a stick-thin teenage child sitting alone at a restaurant absolutely going to town on these ribs. this child is eating like hes trying to personally rid the world of ribs. i've been timing him, he orders a full other rack of ribs every 2 minutes. this is fucking insane i dont know what to do

obsessed with the fact humans successfully made computers to do math so now we are making computers worse at math

This is why it was a huge mistake to dub something the way of the future and dump billions into it before seeing if it has any crippling flaws.

I’ve said it before and I’ll keep saying it:

Even the engineers working on this shit, who should know better, seem to be laboring under the illusion that they’re building a robot friend. That these large language models are one step away from Johnny Five, from Lieutenant Commander Data, from Bender Bending Rodriguez.

And they’re just not. They’re not even close.

It’s an absurd delusion.

But, in their defense, giving you wrong answers 98% of the time sounds pretty on brand for Bender.

its so disgusting that you actually have to practice skills to retain them. just stay in my brain for retrieval pleaaaaaaassssssseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee