Quest acquired: Pet the kitty!

Requirements: Pet the kitty.

Reward: Petting the kitty.

Doctor: $140,000 a year

Furry artist on Patreon: $160,000 a year

i think you’re lowballing the furry art amount tbh

I’m sorry for the inaccuracies, Doctor Yiff

no matter how I respond to this I don’t look good, well played. i walked right into that

Well, furry artists are typically more competent and courteous than your average doctor, so I can see that.

Did you just legitimately tell me that a person who draws wolf ass is more competent than a dude who spent 8+ years in a university to give you your lung transplant?

doctors are bullshit and furry artists perform an infinitely more valuable service to society compared to them

You will die in 7 days

It took doctor’s like 10 years to diagnose what was wrong with me, some insisting I was faking for attention while a furry artist I knew just went “that sounds like crohn’s” after hearing me complain once and ended up being right

Also I can’t go to a doctor and ask them to draw Rouge the Bat wider than she is tall with tits to match, now can I

You could if you weren’t a fucking coward

We naturally put millionaires and billionaires in the same general class of person, but the only reason to do that is because the words are similar. Since these aren’t numbers we can actually visualize, it’s important to understand what a billion of something is. To travel a million inches, you’d have to travel from the Southern-most tip of Manhattan and go to the Bronx. To travel a billion inches, you’d have to fly from New York to Shanghai twice. A million seconds is a little over 11 days. A billion seconds is nearly 32 years. A million ounces is about the weight of a train car. A billion ounces is 4.5 Eiffel Towers. Use these to conceptualize what the difference between a millionaire and a billionaire is, and the absurd amount of wealth we’re talking about.

Millionaire: I can buy a fancy sports car, and a huge house!

Billionaire: I can buy THE SPACE PROGRAM

Ithe UN estimates $30 billion a year could end world hunger.

Jeff Bezos, owner of Amazon and richest person in the world, has a net worth of $113.1 BILLION in 2018, according to Forbes. This man could singlehandedly END WORLD HUNGER for nearly FOUR YEARS. all on his own, with money he has access to right this moment.

THIS is the shit we’re talking about when we complain about the filthy rich. Your friend making like $60K - $250K a year with a sports car and a pool and a nice house and a comfortable savings isn’t the problem. The people whose net worth is in the 9 digits are the people we’re talking about.

Oh no what a fucking tragedy

Why don’t you Google average wait times to receive a medical procedure. There are Canadians that come to the U.S. to get medical care rather than wait over a month to get it done in Canada.

I had cancer and im canadian dumbass i know full well what the wait times are like and its only long if its shit that can wait. Im sorry but im ok with waiting with a non life threatening injury if no one gets turned away from healthcare because they’re poor. The only canadians that go to the united states are rich enough that they are willing to spend the money to save a few hours waiting

Except people with life threatening injuries have to wait as well. My father had to go to the ER because the screws in his knee busted making his stitches rip open and my parents waited for hours before finally leaving when they noticed an elderly woman with a head injury and broken leg waiting at least four hours BEFORE my parents arrived.

 http://www.ctvnews.ca/health/death-after-34-hour-er-wait-was-preventable-judge-1.2144671

Brian Sinclair’s death was completely preventable, yet he waited 34 HOURS in the ER for treatment that would have taken 30 minutes to an hour at most.

There are pros and cons to Canada’s healthcare, and if people want to spend extra money for arguably better treatment and shorter wait lines, I’m personally going to support them any way I can.

Yeah, that happens in the US too though. Literally every single day. Go into any ER in the country at like 9:30 pm and you will see dozens of people with painful injuries waiting hours to see a doctor. People die in the US waiting to see a doctor. The only difference is that it costs them hundreds of thousands of dollars to do so.

I had to wait six months to see an endocrinologist in the US and when I wanted to switch doctors I had to wait another six months to see somebody else, who are these people in the US who don’t have wait times?

You know what the Canadian system has that the US system doesn’t? Actual in-depth documentation of actual wait times. Here are the 50/90 numbers for my tiny-ass chronically underfunded province. Here they are for a populous and well-funded one. You’ll notice that the general trends of those numbers are either flat or downward - which is not the case in the US, from what I can find. You’ll also notice that the 30-day benchmark cited in that paper is… not very far at all from most of Ontario’s 90s.

(Brian Sinclair’s death, by the way? It’s a terrible tragedy… but the problem there was not that health care resources are spread too thin. It was racism. They saw a native man and assumed he was homeless and drunk, not in distress. As the study I cited above shows, racism is also a factor in US health care.)

So basically, you’re paying a lot more, at both the end-user and governmental levels… but you’re not actually getting a lot more.

Finally: You know what else Canada has that the US doesn’t? Wait time guarantees that require offering a faster alternative if they’re blown.

All those stories of Canadians coming to the US? Yeah, they’re basically made up. Even the highly shady right-wing think tank that Fuckface von Clownstick got the story from, trying to make the best possible case for privatization, only found that 1% of Canadian patients received health care abroad. One. percent. And that’s not “went to the US for health care,” that’s “received health care literally anywhere else for any reason, including just happening to be in another country when we got sick or injured.”

The actual numbers? Well, this study is old, but… out of a pool of 18 000 respondents, they found twenty who went to the US specifically for care.

Twenty. 0.11%.

They found that this data was consistent with Canadian payment records and US border region hospital data, so… yeah. It basically doesn’t happen. And when it does? Frequently that’s because there is an issue with the normal procedures in Canada… so the provincial government covers the cost of getting the patient to the US and treating them there.

I’ll take that over “you must be this rich to live” any day of the week.

It was also found Canadians who are treated in the States are far morely to be there because they became sick or injured while on vacation or are snow birds rather than they purposefully crossed the border.

‘Cause let me tell ya, as someone with a few chronic issues, if my choice is a 20 minute trip to the local hospital in bad traffic, where I’ll at least get coping treatment while I wait or an hour trip, plus border wait, to the States? Yeah, I’ll go local every time. The whole not having to shell out money thing is nice.

I also live near the second busiest hospital in BC. (Possibly Western Canada) Longest I have EVER waited is two hours.. and that was for a shot of toradol for pain treatment.

Another thing the liars above leave out is the huge number of working people in the US who just… don’t go to the doctor when they get injured. Because they know they can’t afford either the cost or the time away from work to get treatment and let it do its work. The US is filled with manual laborers -from roofers to bartenders to painters to stockers- with chronic pain conditions, un- or poorly healed injuries. How do they live with it? Every advil/tylenol/aspirin commericial tells you how. The importance of pain-meds to Pharma profits and easy availability of blackmarket opiates suggests an alternate answer.

The US is 300million people largely self-medicating their pain-management because they don’t want to lose their jobs, can’t afford to see a doctor for it, and don’t trust doctors because of previous bad past experiences caused by the private healthcare system. These people are, effectively, stuck in life-long wait-times, yet conservative defenders of our broken system always seem to forget to mention them when the subject of public healthcare arises.

@allthecanadianpolitics

I have a friend who right now is waiting for a surgery to fix her very badly torn ACL. You know, the ligament that makes it so you can walk, which is kind of important for basically all kinds of work. She is in constant pain, and she already has depression problems so it’s really a precarious situation for her to be in mental-health-wise. She can’t work, so she’s losing money sitting at home unable to do anything. They won’t give her a wheelchair, and she had to pay for her crutches so she can hobble around her house. She can’t drive with her leg jacked up, so she’s homebound. They’re making her wait til the end of March to get it fixed. (It happened late December.)

Oh yeah, and she’s in the US. She’s being told to wait because she’s on a bad insurance plan (the only one she could afford) that won’t let her go to a further away specialist, and the only one in her area is booked up through March. She can’t afford to pay out-of-pocket for the specialists further away and since her insurance won’t let her go there, she’s stuck waiting. Tell me again how great American health systems are and how we don’t have wait times because of it?

On top of this, can anyone explain to me how a shortage of available personnel is the fault of the insurance system and not the physical limitations of population size in proportion to currently standing/staffed hospitals and doctors? I’m trying to wrap my head around “more people getting seen” being a bad thing, is the US system’s solution to this “poor people just do not get care so there are fewer people in line”? Wouldn’t the solution to the problem be “encourage more people to become doctors and nurses, subsidize education and build more emergency care centers”? I’m??

So like can we stop pretending that just because Canada hasn’t absolutely perfected it’s healthcare yet that it somehow isn’t still a far better way of doing things?

When I had my consult with the neurosurgeon for my decompressive craniectomy, it was in early March. Since it was not a life-threatening situation and the doctor was also the chief surgeon and the head of oncology in a neurological hospital, I was told I’d likely have to wait a bit, and was given an estimate of “Early June”. So, three months. Not terrible for a non-urgent procedure by an incredibly busy, incredibly qualified doctor. I got a phone call in the beginning of April telling me that some space had opened up and my surgery would now be April 19th. I literally did not have time to train a replacement at work, get a will done up, etc. So yeah, the wait times here in Quebec can be pretty irritating for non-urgent things, but when it’s stuff that really needs to get done, *it gets done*. And often even sooner than estimated. My surgery ended up costing a whopping $240, because I requested a private room and WiFi access. Had I been willing to sleep in a ward and just use the internet on my phone, it would have been free. Same procedure in a similar facility in Colorado that specialises in neuro procedures? Estimated $140,000. And a six-month waitlist.

OK, time for the US to wake up and realise all they think they know about healthcare in other countries is pretty much just lies and propaganda to make them accept their broken system.

Lets see if I’m following here. 

Wait times happen because the health system has a supply/demand mis-match, thus priority has to be given to some patients over others. Wait times based on medical need mean that people with less severe issues will wait longer.

This is unfair, says the person against socialized health care, because who has to wait for service shouldn’t depend on the severity of their issue, but instead, their capability of paying for the access. 

So we have, in essence, two proposed solutions to there being a shortage of health care, one is that the people with the greatest need would get priority, and the other is those with the greatest wealth will get priority. This is the fundamental flaw with treating issues of public good as commodities. The millionaire with the cold gets the room, doesn’t matter if someone else has a broken arm.

If you’ve ever wondered how lakes are stocked with fish, here it is! Thousands of native fish are being dropped from an airplane. Video is from the Utah Division of Wildlife Resources.

this is so funny to m

Goodbye bitches

PetSmart Fish Lady:  You have to be very careful not to jostle the goldfish, then let him sit in the bag in the tank for an hour to let his temperature adjust to your tank, and then carefully pour it into the water.

Utah Fish Official: BOMBS AWAY FUCKERS

(via jackbutcher_08)

gifted student™ brains are about as functional as horses when you get right down to it 

which sounds like a shit post but consider: horses? hypothetically MADE for running. look at this magnificent muscle beasts. look at those legs. they must be so good at running, right? wrong. horses are fragile as fuck. horses break their gotdamn legs so so easily, and if they break their legs you just have to fucking shoot them. if they run, the thing they are MADE FOR, too fast their lungs will start bleeding. I just googled horses to see if I was missing anything and apparently if they lie down for a day their organs start collapsing or something so they can’t rest from their One Horse Purpose even when they’re hurt. they’re made to do one thing but they can only do it under Very Specific Conditions and if a single thing changes they just die.

 which, you know. gifted students™ get applauded for being naturally smart when we’re five or whatever and then develop a terrible inflated sense of self that makes us highly averse to anything we’re not naturally good at, because it challenges our fragile childbrain egos and if we wait too long we’ll develop mental fences around entire subjects and skillsets (mine are math and studying) because we think we’re Bad at them, when in reality we just need to practice but are frustrated by that because it’s harder than being ~naturally talented~ was. we get applauded for doing One Thing but the second we run into slightly different things that our brains don’t comprehend as readily? it’s a Bad Time. I still have so much anxiety over things I don’t feel Naturally Talented at that I’ve been sitting here writing this post for like 10 minutes rather than read the feedback on my religion paper. I got a 100% on it, but I’m still That Scared of anything other than straight heaps of praise because that’s what my childbrain was acclimated to. just send me to the glue factory already. 

Its important to note that a lot of horse problems are because of how they are exploited by people, pushed too hard and made beasts of burden that they were never meant to be. I think this strengthens the analogy

this year we oppress apple users

Like y'all can see shit anyway all your phones cracked from dropping it a centimeter off the floor

sorry i cant hear you im too busy looking at someones pores from a mile away with my iphone 7 plus camera with HD retina display and 1920-by-1080-pixel resolution at 401 ppi focus

I know you can’t hear because they removed your headphone jack

Anyone got a hot take on Gen Z students at Hogwarts?

Me, a new professor desperate to connect w the youths: and so expelliarmus will ‘yeet’ the wand right outta their hand

THIS EXCEEDS ALL EXPECTATIONS. THANK YOU

Your wife changes her hair color every season and her personality adjusts slightly. You’re secretly only in love with Autumn wife. She just came home sporting her Winter color.

it’s my fault. it’s just that when we met it was autumn; her red-orange hair and crackling laughter. there’s a little spooky in her, a lot of play. and what a better time for falling?

i didn’t realize it for the first few years - something shifting, something so subtle. the winter makes us all cold, the summer makes us all a little out of our minds. i just loved her, because she was incredible, and i was the luckiest person alive.

it’s just that i realized that spring came with sudden bursts of cold. it’s just that summer frequently raged in with fire sprouting from her lips. it’s just that winter was the worst of all, her eyes dead. it’s just that autumn loves me different; throws herself into it without the clingy sweat of summer. i used to love that summer girl, you know? i loved how wild she was, the way in summer she took every risk she could. but i carried her home drunk one too many times, cleaned up one too many of the messes she made for no reason than to enjoy the sensation of burning. and winter was worse; the shutdown, the isolation. how she became distant, a blizzard, caught up in her own head, unable to tell me what was wrong and unable to think i actually wanted to listen.

she comes home, her hair bleached white. a dark smile on her lips. the shadowy parts of her are back. they loom like icicles overhead. she kisses me with her body held at a distance, a peck on my cheek that feels like an iceberg. she makes polite conversation and we go to bed early, our bodies untouching. 

it is a lonely season, i think on the ninth day of this. winter is cold. winter is known for the death of things. when i look at her, i see the girl i fell for, inhabited by an alien. she was the first women i loved so much i felt it would kill me. i can’t leave. when i wake her up with my crying, she tells me to shush and go back to sleep. she’s different like this, quiet, doesn’t eat. 

three days later i stare at myself in the mirror. i wonder if it’s me. if the fat on my body or something in my face or the wrinkles and she doesn’t love me. i try prettier lingerie, lean cuisine, i try different hair, more makeup, try harder. it doesn’t work. she looks at me the same; that empty gaze that neither loves nor condemns my actions. 

somewhere in februrary i lose it. we’re fighting again, from car to restaurant to car to home again. we fight about stupid things, small things; i tell her i feel she doesn’t love me, she says i’m not listening. the circle goes around and around, old pain peeling back, new pain unhealing. i sleep on the couch.

i wake up when i hear her crying, white hair around her all messed up. the kind of sobbing that only comes at two in the morning, heavy and thick and hurting. my winter girl. my heart is breaking. she looks up at me like i’m her anchor. “i’m sorry i’m like this,” she says. and i start saying, it’s okay i’m here we’re married, but she just shakes her head and says, “I know this isn’t the real me.”

i hold her cold hand. she stares at the blankets. “i am different in winter,” she whispers, “i know i am and i’m sorry.” she looks at me. “why do you think i dye my hair? cut it off? get rid of the old me?”

i tell her it’s okay. we’re together and it’s okay, and then she whispers, “i’m sorry you married four of me.”

we lay there like that, her head on my chest. she falls asleep. i stare at the ceiling, thinking of the way she sounded when she was crying. how i helped put her in that pain. how i promised in sickness and in health and everything in between.

the next day i spend at the library. there aren’t enough books on how to love someone with seasonal affective disorder so i make my own, notes and pages and little ideas on post-its. and i take a deep breath and make myself a promise.

she comes home to her favorite dinner and we kiss and she’s uneasy but that’s okay. the next day i bring home flowers and the next day she finds little love notes in her pockets. i love her quiet, the way winter demands, understand her sex drive is faltering; spend more time just cuddling. we drink wine and we kiss and some part of her starts relaxing. 

the truth is there is no loving someone out of their mental illness. the truth is that you can love someone in despite of it; love them loud enough to give them an excuse to believe they can make their way out of it.

and i learn. i remember the rebirth of spring, when she starts thawing. we kiss and have picnics in pretty dresses. i remember her joy at little birds and her rain dancing. i fall in love with the flowers in her cheeks and the little bursts of cleaning. i fall in love with summer’s slow walks and milkshakes and shouting to music playing too loud on the speakers. i fall in love with her dancing, with the sunfire energy. and when winter comes; i am ready. i remember that snow used to look pretty. i fall in love with the hearth of her, with the holiday, with the slow smile that spreads across her face so shyly. i fall in love with how she looks in boots and mittens and every day i find another reason to love her the way she deserves - they way i always should have.

she comes home with her white hair and dark smile and a package in her hands. i ask to see what it is and that small shy grin comes creeping out. it’s a sunlamp packed in with medication. she looks at me with those wide eyes and that beautiful winter blush. “i’m trying to get better,” she whispers, “i promise.”

recovery doesn’t look immediate. sometimes it isn’t neat. i can’t say we never fight or that we’re suddenly complete. but each day, that tiny girl’s strength gives me another reason. i love her. i love her while she tames the roller coaster of spring; i love her for reigning in the summer storms; i love her for taking her winter and trying to be warm. it is hard, because everything worth it is hard. she spreads out her autumn leaves; mixes the best parts of her into everything. learns to take winter’s silence for a moment before yelling in summer. learns to take autumn’s spice and give it to spring. we are both learning.

one day she comes home and her hair is different, but it’s a style i don’t know. i kiss it and tell her that she’s beautiful and the inside of me swells like a flood. i’m so glad that she’s mine. every part of her. the whole. i am the luckiest person on earth. and i always have been. but she’s hugging me and saying, “thank you for helping me,” and i can’t explain why i’m crying.

this is what love is; not always an emotion but rather your actions. the choices we make when we realize our lives would be empty if the other was absent. this is what love is: letting them grow, helping them find their way in out of the cold. this is what love is: sometimes it takes work to see how the thing you planted together actually grows.

this is what love looks like in an autumn girl: it is winter and she glows.

I’m actually sobbing jesus christ

my heart is aching??? this is gorgeous

Wow. Worth the read, don’t scroll.

This is everything.

Everything about how to love.

I was not prepared

Nor was I.

“this is what love is; not always an emotion but rather your actions. the choices we make when we realize our lives would be empty if the other was absent. this is what love is: letting them grow, helping them find their way in out of the cold. this is what love is: sometimes it takes work to see how the thing you planted together actually grows.”

Tumblr is finally catering to me

dogs are incapable of sin

but not of mischief !!!

you’re right

house arrest is so funny to me. you commited crimes, stay home

its getting grounded but for adults

I made a difference in the world!

REBLOG TO SAVE YOUR QUEER HEART FROM BREAKING

I’ve seen a bunch of people in the notes concerned (like I was) of comparisons of members of the lgbt to dogs: but upon visiting their website I was reassured that they monitor a variety of content, including (but not limited to):

THIS IS A GOOD SITE

idk if I’ve posted about this before but by far the strangest things that’s happened to me in retail was the time someone’s total came out to my birth-year and I said “hey! that’s the year I was born!” and then the next customer’s total came out to like $12.57 and just bc I’m a weirdo I said “hey! that’s the year I was born!” and without missing a fucking beat this like, 70+ year old man said

“Ah! Another like me! We’re few and far between these days, aren’t we?”

And I was like oh man this guy’s sense of humor really aligns with mine! And I laughed and made some other joke about being immortal and thought that was the end of it,

but this man.

He stood by the register for five more minutes. Maybe more. Which let me tell you is an EXCRUTIATING amount of time for something like this to happen.

And he just kept upping the ante!! He starting talking about some REALLY specific details regarding day-to-day life in the 1300s to the point I started getting worried that I’d misled a genuinely immortal being to believe I am also immortal.

He eventually politely left when I got too busy with other customers to awkwardly respond.

Who the fuck was that guy.

I think it’s also important to mention this happened at Cracker Barrel.

hey siri add to calendar ‘vandalize todd howard’s wikipedia page’ on april 25th, 2018

the day approaches

straight people are an enigma.. “oh i met my ex-fiancé in november then we got together for a few months but he left me for my best friend.. then when he left her i got back with him and we were engaged in february but he cheated so we broke it off. also he had no job or car so he was always using mine and wrecked it” really? Really? that’s really

“this isn’t realistic” i had a coworker tell me this an hour after meeting me for the first time