One Step at a Time

say what you want about millenials but at least we dont lick our fingers to turn a page

Can y’all get off my post about forgiveness talking about how I need to forgive for me to be happy?

How many times do I have to say I’m hateful and happy?

People get so upset when you tell them that you're healing just fine without having forgiven the people that have hurt you. Some people truly don't believe that anger is a healthy emotion and that you can live a happy life with it

For a lot of people, being able to be angry at an abuser in the first place is an achievement.

Abusers don't want you angry. They want you to take the bad things they do without complaint, they want you to forgive them always. Anger at their actions is one of the biggest things they stamp out because a lack of anger lets them keep being abusive without consequence.

There are a lot of survivors out there who've spent their lives doing nothing but forgive their abusers over and over and over, because that was the situation they were forced into, because it helped them survive, because they wanted to give their loved ones the benefit of the doubt, because they're taught from a young age to hate and fear their anger.

When they learn that they can, and should, be angry for how they've been treated, that's a step toward healing. I'll say it again for the people in the back; for a lot of people, feeling anger in the first place is a huge step in their recovery. Learning not to forgive an abuser, after a lifetime of forgiving everything by default, is a step in the right direction.

Don't tell survivors who are expressing anger that they need to forgive in order to feel better. There's a good chance that forgiveness is the problem that they're trying to unlearn.

"Abusers don't want you angry. They want you to take the bad things they do without complaint, they want you to forgive them always. Anger at their actions is one of the biggest things they stamp out because a lack of anger lets them keep being abusive without consequence."

Omg, YES!!! This is so true. One of the things my counselor had me work on was to allow myself to get angry. I never used to, because I felt that it was a waste of time. As a result of holding in my resentment and anger, my physical and mental health took a serious hit.

It is ok to dislike, hate, or never forgive an abuser. It doesn't even have to consume your life. You can control what you do with that feeling. There are people who I will most likely never forgive; they occupy absolutely none of the hours in my day.

*gets penalty* “that’s bullshit” *watches replay* “.. yeah okay”

This is flawless. I can’t stop watching.

he really said 😬

My autistic brother created a new family Christmas tradition

Cute, right?

Well, for whatever reason only known to my brother, he decided that he wanted to put Barry in different rooms of our house and it usually scares the shit out of whomever happens upon Barry; usually the person who finds him is the person that my brother wanted to scare.

So far, Barry has been found

On our dining room table

On my dad's side of my parents' bed

In my parents' closet

Outside their bedroom door (at 5 in the morning and scared my mother shitless)

Near the kitchen door

Near my fucking bed

At the bottom of my sister's stairwell

In our bathroom

And down the hallway

This has gone on for 9 days and it doesn't seem to show signs of stopping. Most of the time we know who gets Barry because it's always followed with a very loud "FUCKING BARRY!!!!!"

My brother is the funniest fucking person I know.

Update:

He found his way into my sister's room.

And my brother is cackling maniacally downstairs.

Holy fuck this doll is creepy

Another update:

The soft glow of the Christmas tree seems to quell his bloodlust

vote to replace the evil surveillance Elf on the Shelf with Barry the Chrismoose

Broke: Elf on the Shelf Woke: Moose on the Loose

Bruh

Yooooooo…

Levels

I wanna say Thats violation but that means he was gone send her that unwanted shit too 😂😂😂

black mirror season 4

Savage

Oh wow

This is super epic. 

He was obnoxious to begin with, it is true, but if he moves forward in this wooing as a respectful dude, he will text her something nice like it was fun to meet her or maybe ask her on a date.  Mom will text him back and there will be a bit of confusion before he realizes what happened.  He’ll be a bit chagrined and mom will probably feel bad enough for him being rejected to make him cookies or something.

HOWEVER

If he starts in with that fuckboy shit (asking for sex right out the gate, dick picks, asking for nudes, etc.), he will learn the ultimate lesson. 

In short, he is only fucked if he fucks himself.

This is Greek Mythology levels of savage.

#In which a man is in command of his destiny #And does not know it

YOOOOOOOO

i learned that in August 2014 Women’s Voices for the Earth commissioned testing of four types of Always menstrual pads, manufactured by Procter & Gamble. The certified laboratory STAT Analysis Corporation analyzed the products for volatile organic compound.

“The results of the testing indicate that both scented and unscented Always pads emit toxic chemicals, including chemicals identified by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services National Toxicology Program, the Agency for Toxic Substances and Disease Registry, and the State of California Environmental Protection Agency as carcinogens, and reproductive and developmental toxins. None of these chemicals are disclosed on the product by the manufacturer.” (x)

I switched to dye free fancy cotton pads, after years of having periods so fucking bad I would sometimes faint, and now i just get like. regular cramps occasionally, they’re not even that bad anymore.

i switched back to these after using fancy organic cotton pads during my most recent period & they caused PROBLEMS out of the blue - 100% confirmed, these are not good to use

been using these reusable menstrual pads since november 2019 and im never going back to these commercial pads. commercial pads like these always gives me skin rashes which is so annoying. switch to reusable i swear you’ll not only be period-ready but also rashes-free!

psa they also have a starter pack in case you want to switch and you dont know what to get and an xl size for plus sized women!

EXPLAINS ALOT. WOULDVE BEEN NICE TO KNOW AWHILE AGO. COOOOOOL.

Plus, there’s a study that showed that vagina are highly vascular so, basically, every chemical you put down there is absorbed by your body real fast and really well. In short, ditch tampon too.

TAMPONS are dangerous frequently the direct cause of TSS  TOXIC SHOCK SYNDROME

Yeah, reusable pads were one of my first major eco-friendly changes but my body has been way happier that way. They are infinitely more comfortable and effective, and I just throw them in my washing machine on the hand wash + extra rinse and hang dry. I can’t say being on your period is ever pleasant, but it’s way better than before - ESPECIALLY in situations where you can’t change as often - and I don’t feel like the harbinger of the end of the world when I look at my restroom trash can anymore :)

I always buy generic brands but wasnt “always” the ones who were sending fucked up pads to women in africa just a few years ago too???? Fuck always brand.

PSA!!!

they now have a budget-friendly trial pack so you no longer have to worry which pad fits best for you. you can just buy the pack to get one pad of each size!!

Could the fact that i use Always brand be the reason i get such bad cramps?? I must test this theory…

Nina Himmelreich (@nhmml)

Serene by burntoshine