If I ever ended my blog, this is the picture I would use to do so. It’s amazing. That is all.
I don’t know if it’s because of the tumblr theme I’m using, but I can’t see the date this photo was originally posted. I wanted to be able to write something dramatic like “5 years and 21 days ago I said this and today it’s coming to fruition” but now that’s been ruined because I don’t know the date. Ha.
But anyways.
If you’re seeing this, this is The End of this blog and of my time on tumblr. After I post this, I’m going to change my password to a mis-mash of letters (I’m literally planning to furiously press random buttons on my keyboard so I won’t know what it is) and I’ll log out one final time.
Quick thoughts.
I am so appreciative of the thoughtful posts I’ve read, thankful for the incredible art I got to gaze at and ponder, and blessed by all the detailed answers I got to every question I ever asked of people I admired.
I’m thankful to have "met” my tumblr mutuals through their writing and struggles and celebrations and quirky personality traits. Each one of you left an imprint on my life somehow, and I want to say thank you. Just so you know, all of the imprints are good ones. :)
Tumblr was a great place to download my thoughts and get my feelings out of my heart and onto paper (virtual paper?). But it’s also been a hindrance to me in a few ways-- it’s been a good excuse to not open up to friends in real life and a way to keep my vulnerability and struggles secret. Going forward, I want less of that. I usually keep private thoughts and struggles to myself, but I’m at a place in my life where I need real community where I’m not afraid to be honest. Now, I need it... but my body wants to rebel and keep hiding. Today I have to be brave and do what I NEED to do.
So with that, I’m logging off.
I’m going to find my out-loud voice. I’m going to find new friends and continue my relationships with old, treasured ones. I’m going to give myself permission to be messy in real life and I’m going to learn how to take up space.
Because I’m worth that. I don’t have to hide. I’m worthy and I’m forgiven by the Father and I’m loved just as I am. And people are waiting to hear my voice.
So Tumblr and all the friends inside, thank you for being a part of my journey. You’ve taught me a lot... especially about myself. That is simply invaluable.
Any friends out there-- if you want to follow my life as it unwinds, the best place to do that would be my instagram (@)kindredcinema. The handle may change in the future but at least you’ll be able to find me there for the next few months. Find me and tell me who you are in a DM! I’d love to journey with you in real life.
Love,
Kristen