Shit I Like

I do wholeheartedly believe Wes Anderson is a sick sick freak. I like his movies but I definitely think this guy has like a hidden room in his spacious french apartment that he slips into quietly each night and it is just filled with tiny little doll replicas of all the actors he's ever used in any of his movies and he puppets them around and mimicks their voices and shit. and sometimes he'll text Owen Wilson pictures of his little doll with a comb or something from an untraceable number and pair it with like "see how I take care of you Owen?" and then the following day Owen Wilson will find him at the service table and go, "Geez Wes look at this," and Wes will pretend to be all concerned and horrified but there is this calculating almost eager look in his eyes that unsettles Owen Wilson. and the next time Wes is having a little soiree with all his actors, his beloved beloved actors, maybe Owen Wilson will accidentally get lost on his way to the beautiful bathroom and find that little room and see all those dolls and his throat will hitch with horror. And before he can call Bill Murray or Adrian Brody to look a dark silhouette will appear in the doorway and Wes looks sort of resigned when he says, "I see you finally found my secret, Owen," and Owen Wilson will try and pretend that he's fine with it but they both know better. and Wes will go (the look in his eyes back again) "We both know this can't get out, right?" and he'll grin very suddenly and Owen Wilson will laugh along very nervously and leave the room and eat some brioche and when the evening is over he will rush over to his Prius and frantically click his keys but over the cobbles on the beautiful beautiful street there is the sound of footsteps. and tears are running down Owen Wilson's cheeks but he can't say a word and Wes, emerging from the shadows, will gently touch him on the shoulder and say, "look, I'll drive you to the airport, huh?" and Owen Wilson will try to refuse but they both know it's futile. and, halfway through the drive, Wes Anderson will smile and say, "I'll miss working with you" and then perfectly jump and roll out of the car, wiping off his corduroy pants, while Owen Wilson's Prius swerves into a local patisserie, bursting into flames

so i just finished watching the extended editions of the trilogy which is nearly 13 hrs long and this meme is correct somehow. this is the only line legolas speaks to frodo in the entire series. the only other debatable line is a scene in fellowship where legolas is speaking to gimli but frodo just happens to be near them and he’s cut to for a reaction shot. i wouldn’t really count it though since it wasnt directed at him.

someone already posted this but the kicker is at the end of return of the king where frodo sees the fellowship again and calls out to everyone by name except for legolas lmaooo

This is it. The one true limit. This is the worst thing I've ever seen someone do to someone else that was still funny.

gays dress like everyone from Jurassic Park tbh

Fair point

Not even sure if these are types of gay, but here we are

I feel like my closet is full of all these outfits ngl

Oh that’s so romantic!

Oh…

If you think they’re not having the time of their lives

The catch means affection. The immediate dunk into the ball pit means love.

just made the best non-looping gif i think

i said it was non-looping i'm sorry what am i supposed to say!!!!!!!

Everybody looking at this post

More favourite tropes:

dick

star wars / batman au and bruce is a mandalorian who picks up foundlings like nobody’s business and loudly & vocally disapproves of the jedi even though half his kids are proficient in the force

bruce’s helmet has little points that stick up like bat ears and his armor is mostly black so the non-mandalorians who don’t know his name call him “the bat”

EVERYONE is scared of the bat except fellow mandalorians cause they know he has 7 foundlings & would be willing to take more

everyone in the tags saying “clark is a jedi” is RIGHT. clark is the only jedi bruce marginally can tolerate 

Bruce actually bothers to learn non-lethal takedowns and goes out of his way not to murder people indiscriminately unlike his fellow mandalorians. Which only makes him scarier because now there are survivors to talk about what mandalorians look and act like.

The entire planet of “G’tham” lives in terror and awe of their Mandalorian bounty hunter.

Meanwhile whenever civilians ask other mandalorians about Bruce they all just sigh and are like

“Yeah, that’s the Bat, he’s a bit of a weirdo, we love him but he’s a total pacifist for some reason.”

And the awestruck civilian who’d had 8 bones broken and his house burned down by Bruce is just:

“This is what a Mandalorian pacifist looks like?!?!?”

This is a story I would read

Bruce himself was a foundling, adopted by the Mandalorians after his parents were murdered. Sometime in his early adult life, his biological parents’ protocol droid AL-4RD (actually an IG central memory unit in a protocol chassis) tracks him down and is like “Master Bruce! Finally! Your parents left you everything in their will and i’ve been trying to track you down two decades” and suddenly Bruce is the richest guy in the sector and doesn’t really know what to do with it all

someone made it better

@blackkatmagic

AU where Tony knew Aunt May and Uncle Ben in college so that in Iron Man 2 when Peter goes to the Stark Expo it becomes a “Charles and Ellen Mulaney meet Bill Clinton” scenario in the Parker household.

Peter: My aunt gets the invitation to the Stark Expo in the mail, and she goes, “We gotta go! We gotta go see Tony!” and without looking at her and just turning the page in a newspaper my uncle goes, “Why? It’s not like he’s going to remember you.“ 

With great power comes great responsibility. Same motherfucker.

So my aunt says, “Fine, I’ll take Peter.”

And I go, “Heck yeah!” and I slide out into the living room in my Iron Man mask and we walk out the door.

So we walk into the Stark Expo, and everyone is there. A real Who’s Not of New York Celebrities. J. Jonah Jameson is there. JJJ was the Daily Bugle editor who would do fun things like scream about how superheroes were ruining the world. He’d say like “Ant-Man is a menace! What is stopping him from going full Godzilla on the Empire State Building!” and we’d be like “man that’s the wrong movie monster, J.” He was there. Everybody.

And in the sky above the main stage, we see a glimmer of red and gold. And it was him… Tony Stark. The Iron Man. But he’s up on stage with Justin Hammer and all these prototype drones, so we can’t get close.

Then, the drones start going nuts and shooting at Mr. Stark. And we run, but somehow I get separated from Aunt May. All of a sudden, I’m alone and facing down this drone by myself. Just me and my plastic Iron Man mask. And then the real Iron Man lands behind me and blasts it! He flew off, and I find Aunt May, and I’m telling her what happened as the Expo explodes behind us. And as everything calms down, he lands nearby. Tony Stark. He’s immediately mobbed by reporters, though. So, what are you gonna do?

Well, if you’re my aunt, you ball up the back of my hoodie, and you push me forward like a human shield. And then you start jogging while yelling “this eight year old has to meet America’s greatest hero!” Kind of implying that I might be dying. My feet were not on the ground. She was swinging me like a snowplow, I was just mowing down loud New York reporters left and right. I think I kicked J. Jonah Jameson in the face.

We get through the crowd and land at Tony Stark’s feet. Mr. Stark turns, looks at my aunt, and says “hi, May” because Tony Stark never forgets a bitch, ever. My aunt melts. She goes “hi, Tony.” Then it becomes apparent that she has no plan. So she pushes me towards him and says “this is my nephew, Peter. He’s also going to be a hero one day.” And i was like “what the hell are you talking about? I’m not gonna be a hero” because I had no superpowers and no crazy advanced suit of armor. Yet.

Based on my eight year old memory, Mr. Stark is about 13 feet tall. And he leaned down because, well, besides the Iron Man mask, i was also wearing this button I had bought outside. It was a cartoon button, and it had Justin Hammer on it, and it had a pigeon in Iron Man colors flying over him, and it was shitting on his head. And it said “bird-brained,” and I thought that was very funny. And Mr. Stark leaned down so only I could hear and whispered “hey kid, i like your button” and I said “you can do whatever you want forever” and he took my advice and invented time travel and then fucking died in front of me.

Hey abby do you have a mailing adress? I gotta send you my medical bill for the whiplash this gave me

Peter Parker, a Gen Z kid, screws up: Fuck, guess I’ll kill myself.

Steve Rogers, an artist during the 30’s and a soldier during WWII who knows full well what Dadaism and fatalistic humor are: There’s bleach under the sink–

Bucky Barnes, the guy who listened to Steve’s art rants in the 30’s, watched his back in WWII and went through 70+ years of shit: –And a rope in the supply closet if you want options.

Rest of the Avengers: ?????!!!!!!!?????

Shuri, also a gen z kid: don’t be a coward, jump out the window. Have some style would you

Vision, the human internet who knows what Gen Z humor is: do a flip

🎥 by thund3rbolt

omggggg

that kitty really went

JDHSKXHSK I’M LOSING IT OVER THIS

Zuko: And finally, allow me to introduce the Avatar, Aang.

Aang: Ambassador Aang.

Zuko: Ambassador of what? You’re the only member of your nation.

Aang: And whose great-grandpa’s fault is that?

Zuko: Touche, ambassador.

Aang: I changed my mind now I’m King Aang.

Zuko: What.

Aang: King of the Air Nomad.

Zuko: That doesn’t even make any- whatever. Let’s just proceed with the meeting.

Vice President Aang

Zuko: Wait, who’s the president then?

Aang: *lifts baby Tenzin*

Aang: Don’t forget Lord Momo of the Momo Dynasty.

Zuko: I am not calling him that.

Aang: You’re disrespecting his dynasty, Zuko.

Zuko: Since when does he have a dynasty?

Aang: Well, most of it is gone, now.

Zuko:

Aang: Because of your great grandfather.

Zuko through gritted teeth: Your Momoness.