[video by emersonbrophy. caption: no celery was wasted in the making of this video (very sick of ants on a log)]

Twenty years ago, February 15th, 2004, I got married for the first time.

It was twenty years earlier than I ever expected to.

To celebrate/comemorate the date, I'm sitting down to write out everything I remember as I remember it. No checking all the pictures I took or all the times I've written about this before. I'm not going to turn to my husband (of twenty years, how the f'ing hell) to remember a detail for me.

This is not a 100% accurate recounting of that first wild weekend in San Francisco. But it -is- a 100% accurate recounting of how I remember it today, twenty years after the fact.

Join me below, if you would.

@pangeaseed

every single day I think about how american black vultures are known for engaging in allopreening (preening between different species)

and they have a specific relationship with crested caracaras, in which the black vultures assist them by not only preening them after meals but also leading them to food in the first place— due to their superior sense of smell— while the caracaras assist the black vultures by acting as a warning signal in case of danger

and while this is more typical of black vultures, this is not common at all for any member of the falconidae family— it’s a special bond!

yet another post in favor of vultures everyone , hope you enjoy:) and I implore you to do some more research on these incredible birds !!

...he is weaving the chocolate. Do you copy, this bitch is WEAVING CHOCOLATE

We are so damn lucky Chocolate Guy has a passion for chocolate and crafting beautiful, lifelike desserts.... because if he chose to put this level of work, dedication, and sheer determination into anything even slightly nefarious (instead of nearly breaking the laws of physics in order to create culinary masterpieces) we would be so epically fucked.

did I really just watch this man cheerfully force a block of chocolate through a pasta making machine?

Relationships are easy, you show her the eroticism of the machine and she shows you the eroticism of nature

Robot cock in tree pussy

ROBOT 👏 COCK 👏 IN 👏 TREE 👏 PUSSY

the worlds most loved puppy has just sighed peacefully in his sleep

this best thing about this is the meme format conditions you to expect a follow up statement and it’s absence contributes to a sense of stillness, simulating the experience of just sitting in your truck

Once while driving through Iowa we were flipping radio stations and heard “you ever just walk across your cornfield?” it will haunt me for the rest of my life….

(okay no, but put in the tags something youre the unofficial influencer of. Like something youve purchased enough, used enough, bragged about and endorsed enough to others that you should be an influencer for)

for real tho what is the name of that shell with the markings on it that look like glyphs but its just how the shell pattern grows i cant find it i think its a freshwater mollusk???? im so upset i cant remember it and i dont have any photos to reverse search OTL

LIOCONCHA HIEROGLYPHICA

A SALTWATER CLAM MY BAD HELL YEAH

sharing

google should add more animals to its google docs anonymous readers function thing, like the noble sand dollar

Ty France HBP in the first Ms ST game

baseball is so back

CATEGORY FIVE MARINERS MOMENT

cal was LIVING in mitch's HOUSE last year aaaaaaaaaaa

Developing something called the "gloves and bathroom model of intimacy", which states that if you are doing something involving another person, gloves, and a bathroom, you have reached a new level of intimacy in your narrative

options include, but aren't limited to, hair dying, sex, wound care, and disposal of a body

then there's the most intimate of all: cleaning a bathroom together

thinking about the matte blue scooby doo fruit snack

enigmatic,