This cat is too fluffy for me to comprehend in slow motion

wow continuants wow

WOAHHHHHHHHHH

Me: “Do you guys want to see the fluffiest cat?” Coworkers, immediately and loudly: “YES SEND IT NOW.”

I love cloud cat

that cat is wearing a functional neck ruff

hello elizabethan cloud cat keep up the good work

tfw you come out in class because the discussion needs a gay voice and all of a sudden everyone looks either uncomfortable or like they are charging up their Ally Cannon to blast off as soon as you’re done speaking

straight people just don’t understand that coming out happens every fucking time i want to talk about being gay with a new group of people, be it classmates or teachers or friends or whatever, it’s constant and constantly exhausting

Quick how-to

A lot of comments criticising this post have popped up, I realized the problem and I’ve fixed it.

i don’t really think the relationship between generation z and millennials is comparable to the relationship between baby boomers and millennials

mostly because largely speaking. baby boomers are the parents of millennials but millennials aren’t the parents of generation z

your older sibling telling you you’re an idiot for eating laundry detergent just isn’t the same thing as your parents berating you for not having a job in a shitty economy

“i’m sad i wasn’t born in the era of -” bitch do it! if you like love letters, write them! if you like poodle skirts, wear them! society is imploding as we watch on in abject horror! do whatever you want!

Time to buy a guillotine

taken literally 1 minute apart

Ah, the ‘ol scream and sleep.

ellen degeneres is turning 60 years old this week and i’m not sure how to process that information like…. i never knew how old she was and i never really thought about that fact that she has an age…. i feel like she just exists on this planet as an ageless entity

wh–

what the hell???

we opened at 11 this morning. i watched an old man literally pry the fucking sliding doors open at 10:43 and stand there just staring into the empty store and my coworker & i were like sir. for the love of fuck

I worked in a restaurant for while and a woman climbed past an A board sign, ignored the sign on a the door saying the opening times and trotted on in. When told we were not open she asked why the door was unlocked. My manager explained that it has to be unlocked when people are in the building to comply with fire regulations. Which lead to my favourite exchange with a customer: Woman: But there are no people in here. Manager: Madam. The staff count as people. Woman: That’s ridiculous. *Storms out*

“The staff count as people” has me dead

Ever wonder how big wolves are and why running from them is a really bad idea?

This had me so fucked up the first time I worked at the zoo. Because honestly they just look like big German-Huskies when they’re not wild. They look like big puppies. And then… they get close to you… And it’s suddenly kinda fucking terrifying. Like “oh this is the animal that used to scare people shitless.” “This is the animal that used to run through nightmares and poems so much.” And you suddenly fucking get it. As cool as these animals are far away, as important as the animals are in their natural environment, as much as we need them to survive… they’re still pretty fucking terrifying 

can you believe these things became our friends

And then people domesticated them and now sleep with them in their beds.

We’re not a species meant to last

I’d actually argue the opposite!

We took these super efficient killing machines and befriended them and now they love and protect us as much as we (ideally) love and protect them

Cats basically domesticated themselves so that they could share in our food, medical care, and affection

In urban spaces, prey species know that there’s a higher likelihood that humans will help you if you’re stuck or injured than them killing or maiming you

It’s just, over time we see trends of our species overcoming environmental pressures that would and do lead to extinction in other species by sharing and forming close bonds with other sentient organisms and just kinda… aggressively community-bonding our way out of it?

For a long time there’s been this pervading idea that we, as a species, are just innately violent and terrible and “sinful” and it’s been that violence that let us survive (see the hunting hypothesis of human evolution). But that’s not what we see

We are, at our core, a species that looks into the face of something other, and thinks “I wonder if they want to be friends?” so long as the individual isn’t actively trying to kill us. Sure, tons of people do awful things every day, but for every terrible act or thought on this Earth, there are a dozen acts of kindness that people do casually for complete strangers

So yeah. We looked at these massive fluffy monsters with the sharp claws and crushing jaws rooting in our garbage just beyond the campfire and thought, the way no other species before or after us has done to the same extent; “They look friend-shaped!”

And they were. And that is how we got to be the dominant species on this planet

“They look friend-shaped!”

why are 18 year olds so stupid

excuse you i’m almost 22 and i’m still a fucking moron

me, age 15: i cant wait to be 20 when i will finally reach my full potential, peak me,

me, on my 20s: i cant wait to die

If you see this

You were visited by the magic kitten of rest. Reblog to have a good night’s sleep.

Being afraid to check your bank account is the adult version of being afraid to check your grades.

College is when you’re afraid of both

moe anime girls are brachycephalic that’s why they make those shallow snuffly snorty breathing sounds when they get excited or do any kind of physical activity

I’m watching Clannad and the moe brachycephalic hypothesis could also explain why the girls have such dazed movements, slow soft voices, and glazed over eyes. They just aren’t getting enough oxygen to their brain.

selective breeding has rendered moes biological abominations

Hot take but like…. trans people like don’t have to disclose that they are trans if they don’t want to. Trans people can work with you, be friends with you, and yes, even flirt with you, and not have to tell you they are trans. Our existence doesn’t require a full disclosure agreement.

And furthermore, someone not disclosing that they are trans doesn’t mean they are any “less proud” of being trans that someone who doesn’t disclose that they are trans! So quite telling trans people they need to be out everywhere all the time (potential putting themselves in dangerous and uncomfortable situations) or they’re “ashamed” of themselves!!!