Random Time with Ashlee

Perfect napping weather

untitled by knuckle puck

Why is book insurance not a thing?? Pfft if my house burns down you think my top priority will be finding a new place to live? Nah man, the first place you’ll find me is at the bookstore trying to recreate my library

Why is this so hard? It’s hard because not everybody gets to have what we have.

When you learned of the god of war, you thought he’d be tall and muscular and angry. When you were about to meet him, you braced yourself for the worst.

You weren’t quite expecting the short, scrawny, shy kid you ended up getting instead.

Olive skin, black hair, skinny, dirty face with pale lines where tears had sliced through the ash and dust. A white chiton dress and a threadbare shawl draped over her shoulders.

A pair of wings - huge, black vulture wings, far too large on her tiny body - were the only things that suggested she was divine.

The general shifted his weight from foot to foot. Obviously respect had to be given to gods, but… “Er - I’m sorry, I was invoking Ares? The god of war?”

The child god shrunk in on herself, and pulled the shawl over her shoulders. She muttered something. “Sorry?” the general asked.

“Ares is the god of slaughter,” the child god said in a slightly louder voice. “Not war.”

The general looked at the priest. The priest shrugged, clearly lost at sea. “Well,” the general said, “then maybe Athena? Goddess of tactics in war?”

“Tactics,” the child god repeated. “Not war.”

There was a long, ugly silence, as the huge vulture wings shifted with the whisper of brushing feathers. “My name is - was - Iphigenia. Daughter of Agamemnon, king of Mycenae, commander of the Greeks who stormed the walls of Troy. When my father disgraced Artemis, and the winds of Greece would not blow her battleships to Troy, I was brought to Aulis. For my wedding, I was told. I was-”

She sobbed. Teardrops dribbled off her chin and fell to the temple floor. “I was fourteen. And then I was brought to the highest altar in Aulis, and - and then - and-”

Another sob. “I was fourteen,” she said.

The vulture wings draped over her, and she disappeared under the cloak of black feathers. When they parted, and when the child god looked up at the general, he fell backwards. Those eyes. Eyes he’d seen a thousand times in battle -

“I am the true spirit of war, general,” the child god said. “I am the goddess of bloodshed, of sacrifice, of the slaughter of innocents. I am invoked when men ravage, burn and pillage. I am invoked when mothers cry out, when sons die, when daughters are stolen. I hear it all, general. I have heard it all since the fall of Troy.”

The terrible wings opened up. The child god loomed over the fallen man, twenty, thirty feet tall. Somewhere, the priest was screaming. “How dare you call upon my name.”

Iphigenia

Inktober 11

I didn’t know if I should post this by itself but this is fan art of that super dope story and also of that super dope art. So I figured this’d be the easiest way to credit them.

I laughed way too hard at this

in case anyone is looking through the notes trying to find the original artist it’s will mcphail !! feel free to check out his site but also here are some other things he made too !!

OOOHHH CLICK ON THAT LINK THIS GUY IS FUCKING GREAT

HOLY SHIT

this guy GETS IT

What I expected moving to texas: oh hm, cowboy boot... steak..,? the ole' prairie. youve been invited to,come lasso a tumbleweed,! 'howdy there sherriff' as a tramp stamp tattoo. Sweet teA hp potion... country girls make do

What I got when I moved to texas: i cant really leave the house bc theres about 20-30 of these big blue crabs that came up from their underground tunnels bc of the wet and rainy weather all standing on the patio having a fucking clawnference meeting

Texas:*spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spawns crab* *spa

✨"And you are good. Most things are awful most of the time, but you’re good.“✨

Forgot to post this here, happy New Year’s Eve!! ✨ ✨

never tell me the odds ❤️💙

from RED, WHITE & ROYAL BLUE, which everyone should go read right now because i am never going to shut up about it anytime soon ((pls click for better quality!!!!))

She never looked nice, she looked like art, and art wasn’t supposed to look nice, it was supposed to make you feel something. 

This is it this is my favorite video in the whole wide world

he taps

“I’ve been through a lot personally and the band have been through a lot. I doubted if I could write the record that I loved as much as self-titled record. And then I thought, man I’ve been working my ass off for thirteen years! … the only thing that was mine was this music.” Thank you @yelyahwilliams for these bitter-sweet precious declarations 😻😿 Here’s to @yelyahwilliams #pmorealbum5 and many many more to come!!!😺😸💪🏾

Someone died in my resturaunt and she is definitely not happy about the wait times here… so dramatic

Reblogging for adorable shark and ‘boop the snoot.’

i’m having a stroke