Hi.

I miss Tumblr. At least, I miss making .gif edits and photo edits. Crazy how much life has changed over the last few years. I’m 25 and divorced (and remarried, lmao-- so grateful for my hubby tbh). I’ve been sexually assaulted, have attempted suicide (twice in the last few years), lost quite a few friends and gained quite a few pounds. I have been battling major depression and anxiety in a way I never have before and I find myself missing my days when I was 18/19 and spending hours on photoshop, enjoying K-pop and just chilling. (Though I suppose days are always better in retrospect, so maybe 18 year old me would disagree. She hadn’t been through what I’ve been through though. So... lmao.)

It’s my birthday today 🤗

I don’t care too much generally but my best friend sent me the sweeeeeetest messages right at midnight and it made me feel soooo special, so good. So I feel more inclined to celebrate the fact that I actually made it to 23! I survived the worst of my depression! Survived the suicidal thoughts and attempts! Survived the self loathing and multiple episodes of hurting myself! I survived an emotionally abusive relationship and finally chose to put myself first! Survived 2017! I am alive! How amazing is that!? Feeling proud of myself for choosing to live another day.

I think I’m gonna start posting on soshibnw again.