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Once upon a time, not so long ago, there was a bountiful and busy society. And people of this society decided that if they were to be more bountiful they would need to be more busy. So they slept less, ate less, they even cut back on breathing and stretching. How could that be?
Well they had discovered the perfect drug. It didn’t interfere, much, with busyness: it stimulated them when they were fatigued, relaxed them when they were tense, suppressed their appetite so they could skip meals and as a bonus even got them to breathe properly. All in all, it was the perfect drug.
The years past and the bountiful society’s busy scientists discovered the perfect drug wasn’t so perfect after all. Not only was it harming people, it was killing them. Some people stop taking the drug but most said “I need it to be busy and it’s a risk I’m willing to take.”
More years went by; then government and businesses discovered that the perfect drug was costing them Big Bucks and that was totally unacceptable.
But what to do? The busy society needed this drug to be bountiful.
So everybody put their heads together and came up with some solutions.
One group said ‘what if we modify the perfect drug so it is less harmful?’ and that was done.
Another group said ‘we already have a drug for something else but it also causes people to not want the perfect drug’. So it was repackaged and sold for that purpose.
And finally, another group said ‘we’ve designed a new perfect drug to replace the old perfect drug’.
And people said ‘Thanks we will use these drugs to help us quit the perfect drug when we get around to it.’- except most of them never did. So this story has no ‘happily ever after’ … yet.
What does Cognitivequitting have to offer? - Stories.
Once upon a time some seekers sought far and wide, for years and years until, weary and defeated, they returned home only to discover …we all know how this ends….That what they sought was there all along.
How can that be?
They weren’t paying attention.
They didn’t notice.
It was simply overlooked.
Recently on the Antique Road Show a man brought in a plain, simple blanket that had been in his family for generations. He was just curious about it. It was worth half a million dollars.
The first stage of cognitivequitting is about paying attention to what has been there all along, though overlooked and recognizing its true value.
The next stage of cognitivequitting is about Mistaken Identity. There are way too many stories about mistaken identity to sum up easily so I’ll just remind you of a few: the frog is really a prince, the ugly duckling - a swan, the beggar at the door is a king or god in disguise. Beauty marries the beast and the nerdy kid next door grows up to be Bill Gates.
Things aren’t always what they appear to be.
So how can you know? Well, you learn to match appearance with performance. If a frog is extremely well mannered, pucker up. If you’re always there for a friend and they’re never there for you. It’s time to reassess the friendship.
Cognitivequitting is about discovering exactly what nicotine does for you - not what you think it does.
The final part of cognitivequitting is about dealing with monsters. We all live with an interesting psychological dynamic…. What we desire is usually paired with what we fear. We want love but fear rejection. We want success but fear failure. So, in the fairy tales every castle has a giant, every bridge a troll, and every treasure is guarded by a dragon.
So how do you deal with monsters? There are three ways.
The first is to slay the monster. That’s pretty straightforward and requires a great deal of personal courage.
But some monsters are immortal so those you can only outwit. When you make a deal with the devil, you need to find the loopholes.
The last is my favourite because it requires thinking outside the box. What if you tame the dragon, befriend the giant and hire the troll? Then you could fly anywhere with some muscle to back you up and never worry about your infrastructure crumbling.
Cognitivequitting is about recognizing that the problem is actually the solution. Cravings are a powerful force that you can use to your benefit once you know how.
Cogntivequitting deals with:
What has been overlooked?
In addition to addictive needs, you have been taking care of some basic physical needs with nicotine. Once you are past the physical addiction, hunger, fatigue and tension remain so besT yourself. Deep breathe, eat and stretch in Time.
What has been mistakenly identified?
You think you were smoking because you were angry. The real reason you smoke is because your muscles are tensed up when you are angry and a cigarette will ease the physical discomfort of being angry.
So the question is no longer, “why do you smoke?’ The question is really “what exactly does nicotine do for your body and how can you do it for yourself?”
What do I do about these overwhelming persistent cravings?
Cravings are simply your body’s way of insisting that you take care of it and it’s always your choice how to do that. As soon as you take care of your body’s needs in a timely, appropriate and effective way, your craving for nicotine will dissipate.
How’s that for ‘happily ever after’?
