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So Bright Against The Dark Alleys

@benny-tallboy

My Valentine~
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kaity--did

Okay in my house we have a strange tradition. My mother builds this beautiful Christmas village.

It wraps all around our house through the rooms and under the trees and it’s wonderful.

Every year she hides the Christmas Vampire

This started when I was a very small got child and spread to all of my friends, including my best friend from elementary school who I just so happened to grow up and marry. Now that we have grown up and moved nearly 600 miles away we still always go home for a week at Christmas for multiple reasons, including the Christmas Vampire.

Needless to say we still partake and things have gotten heated.

Stay tuned for the epic conclusion and to see my husband and father in Lin-Manuel Miranda’s sooty costume when I find the Christmas Vampire First!

Happy Haunting!

Dad has no fricken clue how to trash talk and I don’t trust him in the slightest.

The saga continues. Mom hasnt finished the village yet and it’s starting to get to her….

Hahahaha, I mean I love this on multiple levels.  But what really threw it over the top was the mom’s anxiety over the world-building and city design being right.  I feel you vampire-hiding mom, I feel you.

Yeah, but who found it???

We haven’t gone home yet! And my dad is being a CHEATER so he’s been disqualified.

It’s down to two. Stay tuned.

Will he take the bait? We shall see

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if youve never physically been in the presence of like, a real live wolf, and you probably wont get the chance to, heres some stuff about them you should know

  • a wolf’s fur is so unbelievably thick that you can get like, your whole hand into it while petting. and then you can keep going
  • wolves are a lot bigger than you think they are. think about how big you think a wolf is then just like double that
  • they dont really smell like dog but they DO smell and youre not going to be able to figure out if its a good smell or not
  • a wolf really wants to lick the inside of your mouth. he will not stop trying to lick the inside of your mouth at any cost, and generally speaking you need to press your lips together kind of tightly when he approaches your face so that he doesnt worm his damn tongue in there to give you what he thinks is an appropriate greeting
  • a wolf doesnt really want to look at you while you pet him but he wants you to pet him. hes embarrassed
  • if a grown ass wolf decides to lay down on you, you just have to deal with it and thats your life now
  • young wolves, much like young dogs, are overwhelmingly goofy and stupid. a teenage wolf will see your very fragile, very human shoulder and go “i can probably step on that with my full weight” and then he will do it
  • letting a wolf eat out of your hand is actually not remotely frightening, and youll want to do it all day

I wanna know who did this research.

well, i did!

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game: you can buy clothing and accessories for your character, but we advise that you focus on other, more important things like- me, walking into the marketplace:

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Tribute to Steve Irwin, a guy who genuinely loved nature and animals.

This man was beyond real

“Crocodiles are easy. They try to kill and eat you. People are harder. Sometimes they pretend to be your friend first.” - Steve Irwin (r.i.p.)

okay but that snake bit him right in the neck and he didnt even flinch

thats how you know he’s australian….

Funny joke aside, he also knew that the snake he was handling was not venomous, it was only biting him to show it was not happy with the situation it was put in. If it was venomous, he wouldnt have had it that close to himself

“If we can teach people about wildlife, they will be touched. Share my wildlife with me. Because humans want to save things that they love.”

- Steve Irwin

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penny-anna

Pointless LOTR headcanon of the day: Frodo & Merry both take after their mothers, meaning Frodo looks more like a Brandybuck than a Baggins and Merry looks more like a Took. This is a constant source of petty contention.

(Pippin meanwhile absolutely takes after his father & is the most Tookish looking)

Merry: call me a Took one more time

Gandalf: if it looks like a Took and acts like a Took it’s a Took

Merry: I will END you

Gandalf is the only nonhobbit in the fellowship who understands the minutiae of Took Vs Brandybuck Vs Baggins rivalry & he delights in it, everyone else baffled

Frodo: look it’s perfectly simple. The Brandybucks don’t like the Tooks because they play golf and think they’re better than everyone because they occasionally go on adventures. The Tooks don’t like the Brandybucks because they live on the wrong side of the river and like boats. And nobody likes the Bagginses because they’re annoying.

Aragorn: are you… Including yourself in that

Frodo: I said what I said.

Frodo: now the Bagginses don’t like the Brandybucks OR the Tooks because they’re highly disrepectable but also richer than they are. And as far as a lot of the Bagginses are concerned I’m a Brandybuck because I grew up in Buckland and I have the Brandybuck Profile

Merry: which just means he’s not pug-ugly

Frodo: quite.

Aragorn: this is all ridiculous. Keep going.

Gandalf: Hm now I wouldn’t say UGLY but… every Baggins I’ve ever met has been perfectly Round or perfectly Square… There is no middle ground.

Gimli, baffled: Frodo isn’t round OR square

Merry: that’s because he has the Brandybuck profile

Gimli: so… Is he a Brandybuck…

Merry: ABSOLUTE not

Frodo: slander!! I’m a Baggins how dare you

Pippin: was your father a Round Baggins or a Square Baggins

Frodo: my father… Was the ROUNDEST Baggins who ever lived… A perfect Sphere of hobbit…

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